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I can't deal with my BF's smell

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
in Wedding Woes

Dear Prudence,
I have always had an extremely sensitive nose, and I have learned to block out scents that I’m around for short periods of time. My boyfriend, who is a great guy, has a smell I can’t ignore. He is a very clean, hygiene-conscious person, but I hate the way he smells. It’s just his natural odor and it makes my stomach turn. When we first started dating it wasn’t a problem, but as it got more serious, he started spending the night and leaving his scent on my bed. It’s become nearly unbearable. I’ve done his laundry with my detergent to make sure it wasn’t that and also checked out his deodorant and cologne, which are fine. He’s a wonderful guy and I see a bright future for us, but his natural scent is almost a deal-breaker. What do I do?

—A Sensitive Nose

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Re: I can't deal with my BF's smell

  • VarunaTTVarunaTT member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    DH has a natural scent that is different from the majority of other people.  His dad has the same scent (this resulted in a funny story when we had to stay with them during the ice storm that knocked power out for 11 days.  FIL walked up behind me, I turned around for a kiss, and freaked out.  FIL and DH find this hilarious).  It's not unpleasant or bad smelling, it's just a scent that seems to be different, I can't really explain it.  MIL and I have discussed it, b/c she can smell it too.  His older brother smells the same, younger brother doesn't.

    The All Free and Clear gets it out of his clothes.  I have to launder the sheets weekly if I don't want it to build up, so I have 2 sets that I change out.  We also make sure to buy nonscented body washes, b/c there's something about mixing other scents in that will make it unpleasant.  It's almost like when you have a hormonal boy around (though I do think hormonal boys usually are kind of stinky).

    If she cares about this guy,she's going to have to find a way to work around it or break up.  And I hope she doesn't tell him, b/c how self-conscious is he going to be after that (though DH knew about it).
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  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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    VarunaTT said:


      It's almost like when you have a hormonal boy around (though I do think hormonal boys usually are kind of stinky).


    The hormonal boy funk is just so gross.  The kiddo insists on playing video games in his room with the windows closed and you can chew on the scent when you walk in his room.  I'm always telliing him to open a damn window. 

    Also, my sister has an odd natural scent.  Sometimes it's stronger than others.  I can just move away from her and I don't live with her, so it's not something I'd bring up to her or anything.  I do get what the writer is saying.  
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  • dharmabunnydharmabunny member
    Ninth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    This is pretty much why I hate skippy, jif and their ilk.

    There were numerous little kids (some of them disgusting little balls of foulness) that ate PB sandwiches day in and day out. And I swear I could smell peanut butter on them, not on their breath, but as an extension of their body scent.

    So skippy smells like filthy little booger crusted children ;)
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  • VarunaTTVarunaTT member
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    Yes, our neighbor's son has a bromance going on with DH (she's a single mom, DH is a gamer, so he comes over to play video games).  There are times I'm like, "kid, I love you and you're well-behaved and polite, but day old 13 year old boy is kind of gross".
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  • GBCKGBCK member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    Yeah, my almost-sister has a smell; clothes I've borrowed/inherited from her have it for at least 2 or 3 washes (it's fine, I 'like' her smell--and some of it is her soap).

    I know that I have a fairly strong personal scent too--I'm not sure how it smells to other people since I mostly can't smell it, but I know it's there.

    I'd say Mrs. Conn needs to buy him a variety of of different soaps and lotions and have them test them to see what combines well to improve his smell. Not to just cover it up (because crap + Christmas tree isn't an improvement), but that combines well to make it tolerable.
    (like the character on Alphas had to do.)
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
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    i wonder if changing his diet would make a difference. 

    i don't understand why you'd want to stay with someone if you can't stand the smell of them. 
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  • PMeg819PMeg819 member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    It could be something medical. Maybe he has a skin infection or something. I don't know, I'd say something MrsConn.
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  • HeffalumpHeffalump member
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    edited September 2014
    mrs.conn23 said:
    VarunaTT said:


      It's almost like when you have a hormonal boy around (though I do think hormonal boys usually are kind of stinky).


    The hormonal boy funk is just so gross.  The kiddo insists on playing video games in his room with the windows closed and you can chew on the scent when you walk in his room.  I'm always telliing him to open a damn window. 
    When we bought our house, I was like "Why are there eleventy dozen damn plug-ins in this house?"  Then I found out the family we bought it from has five boys, and I understood.

    ETA:  I feel like it should read "had five boys" because the rest of that sentence is past tense.  But the boys are still present tense, it's not like they only have four now or anything.  Maybe if Bmom is still around, she will straighten me out, gramatically.
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  • tawillerstawillers member
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    Heffalump said:
    mrs.conn23 said:
    VarunaTT said:


      It's almost like when you have a hormonal boy around (though I do think hormonal boys usually are kind of stinky).


    The hormonal boy funk is just so gross.  The kiddo insists on playing video games in his room with the windows closed and you can chew on the scent when you walk in his room.  I'm always telliing him to open a damn window. 
    When we bought our house, I was like "Why are there eleventy dozen damn plug-ins in this house?"  Then I found out the family we bought it from has five boys, and I understood.
    Ha!  Our basement is Son's pad.  He's got the bedroom and a furnished living room to stink up.  I had to get a Glade Sense & Spray and I have to spray the couches regularly.
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  • baconsmombaconsmom member
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    Honestly? I'm thinking their DNA is too similar and they should break up. Scent is one of those things that can't be changed, and we react to it for a reason. 

    And hormonal girls aren't any better. Bacon is a stinker, and she's not yet hit the "I can't be embarrassed by anything or my social life will be over" stage, so we have to force her into the shower every night and harangue her about washing her uniforms. So gross. 
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  • larrygagalarrygaga member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    You know that smell of textured hair? FI has that and I love it. He has a natural smell and it's really nice, but he says I don't have one at all and I usually just smell like my face lotion. 

    Smells are so weird.
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  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited September 2014
      
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