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I don't know how to handle this...

mocarski002mocarski002 member
First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment 5 Love Its
in October 2014 Weddings
So RSVP date is today. Last night I get a text from my uncle who lives in FL - I'm in CT. He tells me he sent his RSVP back earlier in the week and apologized for it being so close to the RSVP. Then he tells me how many are attending and meals. I only invited him and my Aunt. He tells me 1 chicken 4 beef so he is bring his 3 sons (my cousins). Who I have never met. The youngest is a senior in high school. I didnt invite them since I figured 2 days home alone is not a big deal. I have only seen my Uncle a handful of times in my adult life. The first time I saw him ince I was a toddler was my freshman year of college. I really only invited him to be respectful. I didn't think he would come. My older sister didn't even bother. Now I am stuck in this situation as to let it slide or speak up. We are paying for a majority of the wedding ourselves. I'm stuck.

 

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Re: I don't know how to handle this...

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    PepperallyPepperally member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited September 2014

    I guess you just need to be honest and say "I'm sorry but we have limited space and the invitation did not include children."  I wouldn't worry too much about it since you aren't that close with him.  I know it's awkward as hell but unless you plan on accommodating his whole family, you just need to be very honest about it. 

     

    Ok, also thought of this:  This is the brother of either your mom or dad...could they help facilitate the conversation so you don't have to?    I just thought, if it were me and it was my mom's brother, for instance, I'd ask her to talk to him and explain that his kids aren't invited.  she knows him better that I do.  I guess it depends on your situation but I may try that route if it were me (because I don't have close relationships with most of my aunts and uncles so I understand the awkwardness).

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    rsbloomrsbloom member
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    I agree with PP, ask your mom or dad to tell him kids aren't invited, or that the invite was only for him and his wife. I've been having my parents and FIs parents do some of that so we wouldn't have to.
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    Dignity100Dignity100 member
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    Part of me wonders if he might have already bought air fare.  If he's already made accommodations I'd feel really bad calling and saying 'Hey, that invite was just for the 2 of you'.  I'm the type that hates telling a person 'no'.  


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    Kerigirl9Kerigirl9 member
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    My cousin informed me via email that her two daughters would be traveling from Seattle to Massachusetts for my wedding. Unfortunately they had not been invited (they are both in their 20s and I haven't seen either of them since they were about 10 years old. The cousins are making a family vacation out of the trip and coming a week early to enjoy the sites before the wedding weekend. I sent an email back letting her know that the invitation was for her and her husband only but that I would love to see the girls at the after party! She never responded but then returned her RSVP including the daughters. I sent an "I'm so sorry if there was any confusion....." email including my hope that she could understand my situation. She finally responded that she understood. But boy, that was awkward.
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    mocarski002mocarski002 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment 5 Love Its
    Thanks everyone. Since its my side of the family and its my moms brother (my mom passed away when i was 3) I will be the one to let him know. Just gonna put on my big girl pants and do it!

     

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    mocarski002mocarski002 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment 5 Love Its
    After the stress and awkward text/messages to finally make it clear the kids aren't invited and confirming just my Aunt and Uncle are coming, I found out last night (4 days prior to my wedding) that they aren't coming. My Uncle told my grandmother he spoke to me this past weekend (haven't heard from him). Its just too funny that I said to my FH earlier this week "I have a feeling they aren't gonna show". I'm mad but not as mad as I could be/should be. At this point I'm ready to get married and party my butt off!

     

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