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Will there be a cash bar?

perdonamiperdonami member
Fourth Anniversary 250 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Okay, super rude question to ask I know, but I am curious to know if the wedding I have been invited to attend this weekend is cash bar or not? 

So far, they have had a bridal shower without registering anywhere and instead requested cash for their honeymoon via a cutesy poem on the bridal shower invitation. Hardly much to go off of, but I just have a feeling it will be a cash bar. 

My SIL asked me point blank if she needed to bring cash for her family's drinks and I just laughed and said, "no, of course not." However, this is obviously an offensive question to ask.

Probably best not to ask and instead plan to bring cash just in case. 
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Re: Will there be a cash bar?

  • auriannaaurianna member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    If she isn't above having a cash shower then she's not above anything.

    Go in expecting the worst and bring cash (some weddings are so bad they even charge for water).
    Hopefully you'll be pleasantly surprised.
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  • perdonamiperdonami member
    Fourth Anniversary 250 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer
    jacques27 said:
    Ugh.  I would bring cash. 

    Actually, if you were planning to give cash for a wedding present, I would bring THAT cash and then take your drinking money out of that.

    Hopefully you'll be pleasantly surprised when you get there and discover it's not a cash bar, but all signs seem to point to it.
    I actually thought of doing just that, bring cash as their wedding gift and deduct from it as we purchase drinks, but I would feel too guilty doing that. 

    However, if it wasn't for this site, I would have no idea that people do this to begin with at all! If they didn't take debit cards, we would be forced to dip into their wedding gift to buy something to drink. 
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    They shouldn't have a cash bar, but if you have reason to believe that there is going to be one, I'd be prepared and bring some cash.
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  • SachaBeeSachaBee member
    Seventh Anniversary 100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    perdonami said:
    jacques27 said:
    Ugh.  I would bring cash. 

    Actually, if you were planning to give cash for a wedding present, I would bring THAT cash and then take your drinking money out of that.

    Hopefully you'll be pleasantly surprised when you get there and discover it's not a cash bar, but all signs seem to point to it.
    I actually thought of doing just that, bring cash as their wedding gift and deduct from it as we purchase drinks, but I would feel too guilty doing that. 

    However, if it wasn't for this site, I would have no idea that people do this to begin with at all! If they didn't take debit cards, we would be forced to dip into their wedding gift to buy something to drink. 
    You shouldn't feel guilty!! You're not obligated to bring a gift. They ARE obligated to host their guests properly. Think of it like a tacky tax.
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  • wrigleyvillewrigleyville member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    perdonami said:
    jacques27 said:
    Ugh.  I would bring cash. 

    Actually, if you were planning to give cash for a wedding present, I would bring THAT cash and then take your drinking money out of that.

    Hopefully you'll be pleasantly surprised when you get there and discover it's not a cash bar, but all signs seem to point to it.
    I actually thought of doing just that, bring cash as their wedding gift and deduct from it as we purchase drinks, but I would feel too guilty doing that. 

    However, if it wasn't for this site, I would have no idea that people do this to begin with at all! If they didn't take debit cards, we would be forced to dip into their wedding gift to buy something to drink. 
    That has happened. We had a thread a while back in which a bride told everyone about a wedding with a cash bar. The guests had no idea, and most of them didn't have cash, so they ended up going through the cards to locate theirs and then took money out of it. The bride freaked out and tried to move the cards to another room, but most of them had been opened already.
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  • perdonamiperdonami member
    Fourth Anniversary 250 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer
    wrigleyville said:
    perdonami said:
    jacques27 said:
    Ugh.  I would bring cash. 

    Actually, if you were planning to give cash for a wedding present, I would bring THAT cash and then take your drinking money out of that.

    Hopefully you'll be pleasantly surprised when you get there and discover it's not a cash bar, but all signs seem to point to it.
    I actually thought of doing just that, bring cash as their wedding gift and deduct from it as we purchase drinks, but I would feel too guilty doing that. 

    However, if it wasn't for this site, I would have no idea that people do this to begin with at all! If they didn't take debit cards, we would be forced to dip into their wedding gift to buy something to drink. 
    That has happened. We had a thread a while back in which a bride told everyone about a wedding with a cash bar. The guests had no idea, and most of them didn't have cash, so they ended up going through the cards to locate theirs and then took money out of it. The bride freaked out and tried to move the cards to another room, but most of them had been opened already.
    So, I just did a search on cash bars and found the thread pretty easily and wow, just wow. 

    I am hoping that the guests only took their own cards back. Despite how awful cash bars are, they do not advocate stealing.
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  • beetherybeethery member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    wrigleyville said:
    perdonami said:
    jacques27 said:
    Ugh.  I would bring cash. 

    Actually, if you were planning to give cash for a wedding present, I would bring THAT cash and then take your drinking money out of that.

    Hopefully you'll be pleasantly surprised when you get there and discover it's not a cash bar, but all signs seem to point to it.
    I actually thought of doing just that, bring cash as their wedding gift and deduct from it as we purchase drinks, but I would feel too guilty doing that. 

    However, if it wasn't for this site, I would have no idea that people do this to begin with at all! If they didn't take debit cards, we would be forced to dip into their wedding gift to buy something to drink. 
    That has happened. We had a thread a while back in which a bride told everyone about a wedding with a cash bar. The guests had no idea, and most of them didn't have cash, so they ended up going through the cards to locate theirs and then took money out of it. The bride freaked out and tried to move the cards to another room, but most of them had been opened already.
    image

    My fucking jaw just dropped reading this
    --

    I'm the fuck     out.

    image
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  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    What exactly goes on at a shower where there are only cash gifts? This is so bizarre to me. 
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  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    ClimbingBrideNY said:
    What exactly goes on at a shower where there are only cash gifts? This is so bizarre to me. 
    The bride opens cards, reads them quietly to herself, thanks the giver, and everyone sits around awkwardly. 

    Yup, been there done that. 
    ________________________________


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  • APDSS22APDSS22 member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    thisismynickname said:
    ClimbingBrideNY said:
    What exactly goes on at a shower where there are only cash gifts? This is so bizarre to me. 
    The bride opens cards, reads them quietly to herself, thanks the giver, and everyone sits around awkwardly. 

    Yup, been there done that. 
    Why would someone want to attend something like that?
    Report Reply
  • chibiyuichibiyui member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    APDSS22 said:
    thisismynickname said:
    ClimbingBrideNY said:
    What exactly goes on at a shower where there are only cash gifts? This is so bizarre to me. 
    The bride opens cards, reads them quietly to herself, thanks the giver, and everyone sits around awkwardly. 

    Yup, been there done that. 
    Why would someone want to attend something like that?
    image
    image



    Anniversary
    Report Reply
  • perdonamiperdonami member
    Fourth Anniversary 250 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer
    I didn't attend the shower, however my MIL did, and she said it was the most awkward and uncomfortable shower she has ever attended.
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  • JCbride2015JCbride2015 member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    chibiyui said:
    APDSS22 said:
    thisismynickname said:
    ClimbingBrideNY said:
    What exactly goes on at a shower where there are only cash gifts? This is so bizarre to me. 
    The bride opens cards, reads them quietly to herself, thanks the giver, and everyone sits around awkwardly. 

    Yup, been there done that. 
    Why would someone want to attend something like that?
    image
    Ladies, I present you with The Worst Bridal Shower Ever for your reading pleasure.  This story involves a cash shower and a surprise guest.  Of the naked variety.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image

    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

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  • melbensomelbenso member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Third Anniversary First Answer
    I always bring cash to weddings in case there is a cash bar. Fortunately, in my circles, I very rarely have to use it. But just in case, I stick a couple of 20s in my purse. And based on the shower, I'd suggest you do the same.
    image
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  • ashley8918ashley8918 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    JCbride2015 said:
    Ladies, I present you with The Worst Bridal Shower Ever for your reading pleasure.  This story involves a cash shower and a surprise guest.  Of the naked variety.

    OH MY GOD. NO.
    Report Reply
  • perdonamiperdonami member
    Fourth Anniversary 250 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer
    JCbride2015 said:
    chibiyui said:
    APDSS22 said:
    thisismynickname said:
    ClimbingBrideNY said:
    What exactly goes on at a shower where there are only cash gifts? This is so bizarre to me. 
    The bride opens cards, reads them quietly to herself, thanks the giver, and everyone sits around awkwardly. 

    Yup, been there done that. 
    Why would someone want to attend something like that?
    image
    Ladies, I present you with The Worst Bridal Shower Ever for your reading pleasure.  This story involves a cash shower and a surprise guest.  Of the naked variety.

    No, no, no...

    If I was the bride and this was all a suprise. I would have not said a word and just walked out of that train wreck. How embarassing! 
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