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nwr- what time do you serve food in comparison with invitation time?

Just went to a BBQ at my in laws. They have many throughout the summer and it drives me nuts that they always put an invite time of 2pm and put out one bowl of chips (for 20 people) then cook and serve at 6pm.

My parents are the opposite, they always tell people 2 pm and they serve you food by 2:30 and then you sit around noshing on any chips or whatever. Maybe its just our family who does that but I get annoyed that the in laws take so long to serve the meal. How do you guys do it?

                                                                 

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Re: nwr- what time do you serve food in comparison with invitation time?

  • It depends on what it's for.  For things like BBQs my parents tell everyone to come around 4 and then they have appetizers and stuff out until the food is done which is like 5.  Same thing with Thanksgiving and Christmas.

    For dinners with friends I usually tell them to come at like 5 and then dinner is on the table at around 5:30.

                                               

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  • A regular BBQ party would have plenty of appetizers are available right from the beginning.  The main course 30-45 minutes later. Sometimes a little later, but no more than an 60-75 minutes after the start time.

    An actual dinner party, say t-giving dinner I would say come around 2, dinner will be about 30 mins later.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • I, too, get annoyed when a food event starts long before food is actually served.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • There is never NOT food out at my/my family's parties. If the party is centered around a meal, it's always served within about 30 minutes of people getting there. Even if it's something like Christmas where we spend all day together, there are never fewer than 5 types of appetizer out.

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  • Ugh, yeah, that would drive me batshit, too. We have lots of snacks and apps out from the beginning, and food served shortly after that -- maybe an hour at most, but even that would be uncommonly long. 
  • K good so I'm not crazy lol 
    I have learned to start bringing appetizers there with me because my first Thanksgiving there years ago, we waited 3 hours for food with not a single snack in sight! 

                                                                     

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  • jenna8984 said:
    K good so I'm not crazy lol 
    I have learned to start bringing appetizers there with me because my first Thanksgiving there years ago, we waited 3 hours for food with not a single snack in sight! 
    There would be mutiny.

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  • We always serve the main dishes within an hour of the invitation time. We make sure there are plenty of appetizers and snacks set out ahead of time. Most people show up during "snack hour", so we never serve right at the invitation start time.

    Lord help you if you aren't there by the time the food hits the table, though. We wait for no one. If you are late, we'll fix you a plate and reheat it.
  • Agree with within an hour of the invitation time. At our house, the first course is usually served 30-45 minutes or so after guests arrive so that everyone can have a cocktail and mingle before formally sitting down. But there are lots of apps out before anyone even walks in the door. We're known for too-much-food.

    I attend some business networking events monthly and it grinds my gears when they have the invitation set for say 9 or 10 am. 11 am everyone sits down for lunch. THEN SPEAKERS. Then lunch. Dude, feed me or I cannot focus. I don't drink coffee. I want food!
  • I also serve about an hour after invite time. Sometimes I have too many appetizers and it gets pushed up a little later but that's per guest's request.
  • I normally serve within 45min to an hour after everybody has arrived (thank you latecomers). I don't think it's polite or appropriate to wait 4 hours and only have a few crisps out for 20 hungry people!
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  • The only big dinners we ever really have are part of Christmastime. Christmas Eve is at my Mawmaw's. Dinner's at three. Snacks (lil bbq weenies, sausage cheese balls, and chips) are available before, but not many people get into them. People start turning up around 10 or 11, and trickle in until right before 3. It's loud and people are taking random pictures of the blender exploding flour all over the place and it's fun.

    Christmas Day is usually at my mom's (wasn't last year, and we won't even be here this year, YAY!). People start showing up at 10 or 11. We visit. I get smacked by my aunt for not wanting to take fifteen thousand posed pictures. Lunch is at about one, usually a little before. There's chips and stuff, and peanut butter balls before. It's polite and people talk at lowered volumes and we sit all prim and proper and I hate it. Bah humbug.

    ....So aside from these two special occurrences, if we weren't eating food by an hour after arrival time, I'd be eating the host's napkins. And possibly the host.
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  • The only big dinners we ever really have are part of Christmastime. Christmas Eve is at my Mawmaw's. Dinner's at three. Snacks (lil bbq weenies, sausage cheese balls, and chips) are available before, but not many people get into them. People start turning up around 10 or 11, and trickle in until right before 3. It's loud and people are taking random pictures of the blender exploding flour all over the place and it's fun.

    Christmas Day is usually at my mom's (wasn't last year, and we won't even be here this year, YAY!). People start showing up at 10 or 11. We visit. I get smacked by my aunt for not wanting to take fifteen thousand posed pictures. Lunch is at about one, usually a little before. There's chips and stuff, and peanut butter balls before. It's polite and people talk at lowered volumes and we sit all prim and proper and I hate it. Bah humbug.

    ....So aside from these two special occurrences, if we weren't eating food by an hour after arrival time, I'd be eating the host's napkins. And possibly the host.
    You and those sausage cheese balls. Now I wanna try some. Recipe?
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  • The only big dinners we ever really have are part of Christmastime. Christmas Eve is at my Mawmaw's. Dinner's at three. Snacks (lil bbq weenies, sausage cheese balls, and chips) are available before, but not many people get into them. People start turning up around 10 or 11, and trickle in until right before 3. It's loud and people are taking random pictures of the blender exploding flour all over the place and it's fun.

    Christmas Day is usually at my mom's (wasn't last year, and we won't even be here this year, YAY!). People start showing up at 10 or 11. We visit. I get smacked by my aunt for not wanting to take fifteen thousand posed pictures. Lunch is at about one, usually a little before. There's chips and stuff, and peanut butter balls before. It's polite and people talk at lowered volumes and we sit all prim and proper and I hate it. Bah humbug.

    ....So aside from these two special occurrences, if we weren't eating food by an hour after arrival time, I'd be eating the host's napkins. And possibly the host.
    You and those sausage cheese balls. Now I wanna try some. Recipe?
    LOVE THEM. And cocktail weenies. SO good. Not gonna lie, that Christmas dinner is the source of my SCB adoration.

    I'll PM you. It's long and I really don't want to threadjack this time, haha.
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  • Holy shit dude. If I had to go 4 hours after being there with only chips, I would lose my damn mind.

    At most of our family events, the host will say "come at 4, dinner at 6" or something like that, so there is a heads up. But we always have tooonnns of appetizers though in those two hours.
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  • Each person in my family serves food at different times, to be honest. When my grandma throws a party, it almost always starts at two, and we almost always eat between 4 and 5. With my mum you can expect a 3 or four hour wait. However, none of these parties ever center around food. If the party is centered around food, I'd want to be eating within half an hour.
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  • Invite for 2pm and no food until 6pm? That's false advertising. She's just asking for people to come late next time.
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  • Each person in my family serves food at different times, to be honest. When my grandma throws a party, it almost always starts at two, and we almost always eat between 4 and 5. With my mum you can expect a 3 or four hour wait. However, none of these parties ever center around food. If the party is centered around food, I'd want to be eating within half an hour.
    What do they center around? No matter what the occasion we serve tons of food and beverages. 
  • Invite for 2pm and no food until 6pm? That's false advertising. She's just asking for people to come late next time.

    I know! I felt terrible because DH invited his best friend and his wife and baby, and they had to leave and get the baby home before they even got to eat. They stayed 3 hours and I felt so bad that they took the time to come (over an hour drive) and didn't get to eat! But it wasn't my house or my party so I couldn't exactly go in the kitchen and fix them something.

                                                                     

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  • If you come to my house, you will be fed. No matter what time of day it is, I will fix you a sandwich or a plate of cheese and crackers or something. And when you're halfway through that, I'll ask what else you want.

    A house without plenty of food is a crime against hospitality.
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  • Inkdancer said:
    If you come to my house, you will be fed. No matter what time of day it is, I will fix you a sandwich or a plate of cheese and crackers or something. And when you're halfway through that, I'll ask what else you want.

    A house without plenty of food is a crime against hospitality.
    QFT.

    I really hate entertaining, I do, but when people are comig over you bet your sweet ass there will be at least three snacks and two bevvies (one alcoholic, one non). And that's just people showing up at 3pm with an hour's notice!
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