Wedding Etiquette Forum

Place cards for couples vs. individuals?

drewisesupdrewisesup member
10 Comments First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
edited October 2014 in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I'm planning to purchase these place cards (https://www.etsy.com/listing/169737809/gold-seating-card-gold-glitter-wedding?ref=shop_home_active_8) when we've received all of our RSVPs in a couple of weeks (optimism!), and the example place card on this site has two names (presumably a couple) listed on one place card. What is the etiquette regarding this? I have been planning all along to get individual place cards for each attendee, but I hadn't heard of combining both names on one card before. Does this appear cheap/uncaring, or is it a common practice? Would love to split my costs for these practically in half if this is socially acceptable but want to ensure that the two-for-one approach isn't off-putting or strange. Thoughts?

Re: Place cards for couples vs. individuals?

  • It wouldn't bother me, but I can see it bothering other people, married couple or not ("I deserve my own place card" type of deal). But mostly, I see it as an added complication that can potentially create a bottleneck blockage at the table where people look for their place card. That's what I'd want to avoid. So, think about questions like: Whose name goes first/ is followed for alphabetical order? Which name does the couple look for if they aren't married/ they have different last names? Do you put unmarried couples together? What about plus ones? do they go on the card too? Again, wouldn't bother me at all, but it seems simpler in some ways to do one card per person.
  • Oh, geez. You're absolutely right. I didn't foresee that logistical mess. Definitely not looking to create a headache for our guests (or for FI and me, at 5 weeks out from the big day). Thanks so much for your perspective. That's really helpful!
  • Most weddings I've been to lately have had one card per couple unless the cards indicate meal choice. It's not been a big problem one way or another. Most of the time, they were laid out in alphabetical order by last name, which could be confusing for me and my husband, since we have different last names, but we make it work pretty well. Usually only one of us goes to get any and all escort cards, so it's easy enough to see that we're on the same card. 

    Literally, the only time it bothered me is when someone put Mr and Mrs Husbands First and Last Name on the place card, despite my repeatedly saying that we are Mr His Name and Ms My Name and that was less about the card itself. 
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  • I'm a fan of one per couple. We just went to a wedding and it's much easier to find only one card vs two.
  • Not married.  Not taking his name once we are.  I wouldn't care what the card said (if I was tacked on to his or he was tacked on to mine), as long as I had a place to sit.  And since you're putting couples at the same table anyway, it kinda makes sense to only have one card per couple.
  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 Boston Suburbs member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I did one card per married couple, and individual cards for everyone else. Mostly because almost all the married couples were Mr. and Mrs. So and So.

    We had one married couple where they had different last names and both were doctors, and I went back and forth deciding whether to do one card or 2. I did one for this couple because they were married but it looked very crowded. 

    Honestly, if someone is bothered because they didn't have their own place card, I would probably never invite them to anything ever again. Their life must be so perfect if something like that bothers them.

    As long as you spell people's names right, and use the correct titles, it doesn't matter if you do one or two cards per couple.
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  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 Boston Suburbs member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited October 2014
    Oh, and deciding which name to use for alphabetizing. Most of the time there is a a "primary guest" so if I'm friends with Karen and she is bringing her boyfriend Steve, I'll put Karen's last name first.

    The couple in my example above was my husband's cousin and his wife. We put the card alphabetized under his name (which is also my husband's last name). Their son got his own card.


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  • huskypuppy14 said, we put the main guest's name first.

    But even for a couple with different last names, it's still not going to take that long when they find their card. Oh, it's not under Jones? Then it must be under Smith. They wouldn't have to stand there and scan the whole table when it's just 2 possible names.

    So I vote one per couple :)
    [Deleted User]
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    One per couple makes sense. Even then, if you have to indicate meals on them, you can still attach two labels or whatever the indicator is to them.
  • banana468 said:
    I'm a fan of one per couple. We just went to a wedding and it's much easier to find only one card vs two.
    Ditto this. We did one per couple, and still indicated both entree choices on the one card. Just two stamps in the corner instead of one.

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  • Thanks, all, for your feedback! Glad to hear that both options are acceptable, if approached with respect to both names. :)
  • Those are the same escort cards we're having! Love them!  If you wouldn't mind, please let me know if they are as pretty in person as they are online!   



  • When is your big day? We're putting in the order no later than 10/22 for our 11/15 wedding (great turnaround time!). I can't wait to see them -- they've received nothing but positive comments on Etsy. Also ordering our table numbers from the same shop. Will absolutely let you know how they turn out!
  • @drewisesup Thank you so much!  My day isn't until 5/23/15 so I have some time!  Wow, that is a great turnaround time!  I was wondering about that!  I did read all the reviews (I'm a review freak) so I'm sure they're awesome but thanks for letting me know! :) 
      
  • I've only been to weddings where there was one card per person... it's great to hear that the one card per couple doesn't cause issues! Maybe I'll consider that as well. Although, I was probably going to make them myself (artist) so the costs wouldn't be as much to do one per person anyway.... things to think about!
  • I like one card per person, but one card per couple works too. My complaint is when I went to a wedding this past weekend, and my parents were on one card, and my brother and I (seated at another table) were listed on another card together, as were our cousins who were our age. I think if you're doing pairs of names, don't make it that way for siblings. I just found it odd. 
    [Deleted User]
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