Sending invites 3+ months out??

Re: Sending invites 3+ months out??

• Maggie0829 member

  

  September 2014

  Allilovesgus said:

  I know it's traditional to send invitations around eight weeks in advance, but could I send my invites out earlier than that so I could get RSVP responses back in more time? My wedding is a semi-destination wedding (it's near where I live but far away from 80% of the guests) and I really need to know who's coming well in advance so I can get a good headcount for the reception. 

  
  

  My wedding is February 28, 2015 and I was originally thinking of sending invites by December 10, 2014 and asking for the RSVPs by the middle of January, but now I'm wondering if I can send them sometime in November and ask for RSVPs by the middle of December. I've already sent save the dates so people know when the wedding is, and I have vocal confirmation from some people, but there are some that I have no idea about and really need the RSVPs. 

  
  

  I'm really worried about the timing and the last thing I want is for my wedding invitations to get lost amid the Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Years hubbub. 

  When does your venue need a final headcount?  You need to go by the date your venue gives you NOT by the date that you randomly want or pick because you are anxious to get a number.

  
  

  Let's pretend they need a headcount 2 weeks in advance so by Feb 14th.  Then your RSVP date should be no more then a week before that so Feb 7th (and even a week is pushing it).  This gives you time to call up the stragglers.

  
  

  I would send your invites out the week of January 12th (that will be seven weeks in advance). There is absolutely no reason to send them earlier.  You sent the STDs so people know the date and will plan accordingly.

  
  

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• southernbelle0915 mod

  

  September 2014

  I completely understand being excited to know who is coming to the wedding. But this is WAY too early.

  
  

  Your venue shouldn't need a final head count more than a week or so in advance. Push back on them if they tell you any more than 2 weeks. It's not like they'll be buying salad 2 weeks before the wedding - gross! This date is probably in your contract, but if you aren't sure, call them.

  
  

  Your RSVP date should be (at the very MAX) 3 weeks before the wedding. No more. 

  
  

  If your wedding is February 28th, I'd send your invitations the day after Christmas (to avoid stuff potentially getting lost in the holiday card shuffle). That's just over 9 weeks from the wedding. Then ask for RSVPs by February 13th but no earlier than February 6th.

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• southernbelle0915 mod

  

  September 2014

  Also, I've gotten a few invitations like this and it's really irritating. I'd be especially irritated if they wanted this super early AND right in the middle of the holiday season. It's just unnecessary.

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• wanderwoman135 member

  

  September 2014

  Whew, thanks! You all have made me feel a lot better about this I'll go ahead and stick with sending them out not so far in advance then. 

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• MairePoppy mod

  

  September 2014

  Please don't.

  Why do you need to know who's coming so much earlier than the rest of us? Most of us are anxious for those RSVPs, once the invitations are sent out. Get your head count date from your banquet manager. I'll be generous and allow an extra 10 days for those who mail their RSVPs on the due date and for you to call those who haven't responded.

  A bride I know mailed her STDs a year out and then mailed her invitations four months out, with  a one month RSVP date. Bride, who ironically is a procrastinator, called us a month before the due date for our response. How rude! There was no doubt in our minds that we would be attending the wedding. The question was whether or not we would stay over night. Bride 'needed' us to make our reservations in her room block. Yikes! It was very annoying and I wondered if B&G had a  b-list and were hoping for declines or if she was getting some kind of discount for room rentals.

  
  

                     

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• Viczaesar member

  

  September 2014

  Allilovesgus said:

  I know it's traditional to send invitations around eight weeks in advance, but could I send my invites out earlier than that so I could get RSVP responses back in more time? My wedding is a semi-destination wedding (it's near where I live but far away from 80% of the guests) and I really need to know who's coming well in advance so I can get a good headcount for the reception. 

  
  

  My wedding is February 28, 2015 and I was originally thinking of sending invites by December 10, 2014 and asking for the RSVPs by the middle of January, but now I'm wondering if I can send them sometime in November and ask for RSVPs by the middle of December. I've already sent save the dates so people know when the wedding is, and I have vocal confirmation from some people, but there are some that I have no idea about and really need the RSVPs. 

  
  

  I'm really worried about the timing and the last thing I want is for my wedding invitations to get lost amid the Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Years hubbub. 

  Even RSVPs by the middle of January for a Feb. 28 wedding are too early.  Your RSVP date should be a week to ten days before your caterer needs the final headcount.
  

  
  
  
  

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• StickEmUpKitty member

  

  October 2014

  We sent our invites out 5 months early... We gave an RSVP date for 3 weeks before the wedding. We sent our invites out early because his entire half of the family lives out of town and appreciated advance notice so the could make their plans. We are a few days away from the RSVP deadline and have not yet heard from about 50 people. Mostly on his side. Most we assume cannot attend because of the distance. But still in a few days time we will need to spend a couple days making all those phone calls to get a firm yes or no response. our numbers are all due 2 weeks prior... but we figured not everyone would rsvp. So we gave ourselves an extra week to track those people down for answers. Send your invites out when you want to... just dont make your rsvp date too soon or they will forget about the wedding in the wait time.
  

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• Maggie0829 member

  

  October 2014

  StickEmUpKitty said:

  We sent our invites out 5 months early... We gave an RSVP date for 3 weeks before the wedding. We sent our invites out early because his entire half of the family lives out of town and appreciated advance notice so the could make their plans. We are a few days away from the RSVP deadline and have not yet heard from about 50 people. Mostly on his side. Most we assume cannot attend because of the distance. But still in a few days time we will need to spend a couple days making all those phone calls to get a firm yes or no response. our numbers are all due 2 weeks prior... but we figured not everyone would rsvp. So we gave ourselves an extra week to track those people down for answers. Send your invites out when you want to... just dont make your rsvp date too soon or they will forget about the wedding in the wait time.
  

  That is what STDs are for.

  
  

  They will forget about the wedding if you send your invites too early as well.  And you have more chance of people forgetting to RSVP if you send your invites out super early because they will put off RSVPing until closer to the deadline which will cause them to forget completely because out of sight out of mind.

  
  

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• wanderwoman135 member

  

  November 2014

  Sorry to dredge this one up again - I've moved my RSVP date to the first week of February but now my problem is...when do I mail the actual invites? I don't want to have them get lost with Christmas cards and the like. 

  
  

  
  

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• Maggie0829 member

  

  November 2014

  Your wedding date is February 28th so you send invites out 6-8 months prior to your wedding date. So send them out between December 29th and January 14th.

  
  

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• MairePoppy mod

  

  November 2014

  You should l mail the wedding invitations approximately 2 months before the wedding date. The RSVP due date doesn't change that. I would mail those invitations out on Jan 1st so they don't get mixed in with the Christmas mail.

                     

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• lyndausvi mod

  

  November 2014

  I would send them out just after the new year.

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  

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