Communicating with Venue

mountaingirl8 · October 2014

I hope I posted in the right forum - I'm looking for a way that follows etiquette to handle the following situation:

My FI and I are in a unique situation planning our wedding (June 2016) as we are living abroad until late next year. FI and I shopped online for a venue, and finally found one that we knew we would love, and best of all, it was right on budget! My parents offered to help with the planning since we aren't in the country, and went to book the venue and pay the deposit to secure the date on our behalf. I had been corresponding with the venue's manager for a couple of weeks to confirm prices and other details. My parents informed me after they paid the non-refundable deposit that the rental rate for 2016 had gone up 60%, and that prices for food would be going up $10 per plate. I feel mislead by the venue manager as I made it clear that I was inquiring about 2016 prices and I found out only after the deposit was paid that those prices would be changing. This change in price will be putting us over budget for the reception. That being said, it's possible the venue manager informed my parents before they paid that the prices would be changing. So my question - is there any way I can negotiate the price of the food? Thanks!

LondonLisa · October 2014

mountaingirl8 said:

I hope I posted in the right forum - I'm looking for a way that follows etiquette to handle the following situation:

My FI and I are in a unique situation planning our wedding (June 2016) as we are living abroad until late next year. FI and I shopped online for a venue, and finally found one that we knew we would love, and best of all, it was right on budget! My parents offered to help with the planning since we aren't in the country, and went to book the venue and pay the deposit to secure the date on our behalf. I had been corresponding with the venue's manager for a couple of weeks to confirm prices and other details. My parents informed me after they paid the non-refundable deposit that the rental rate for 2016 had gone up 60%, and that prices for food would be going up $10 per plate. I feel mislead by the venue manager as I made it clear that I was inquiring about 2016 prices and I found out only after the deposit was paid that those prices would be changing. This change in price will be putting us over budget for the reception. That being said, it's possible the venue manager informed my parents before they paid that the prices would be changing. So my question - is there any way I can negotiate the price of the food? Thanks!

What does your contract say? You should have received a contract when you put your deposit down that outlined the costs and said if there was any planned increase. Otherwise, you really have no recourse as they are allowed to change their prices. You can always ask them to honour their previous quote, but unless your contract explicitly states the cost per plate etc, they really do not have to negotiate. You could ask for a goodwill gesture to get your deposit back and look for a place more in your budget if they do not want to honour the previous prices.

JellyBean52513 · October 2014

mountaingirl8 said:

I hope I posted in the right forum - I'm looking for a way that follows etiquette to handle the following situation:

My FI and I are in a unique situation planning our wedding (June 2016) as we are living abroad until late next year. FI and I shopped online for a venue, and finally found one that we knew we would love, and best of all, it was right on budget! My parents offered to help with the planning since we aren't in the country, and went to book the venue and pay the deposit to secure the date on our behalf. 1. I had been corresponding with the venue's manager for a couple of weeks to confirm prices and other details. 2. My parents informed me after they paid the non-refundable deposit that the rental rate for 2016 had gone up 60%, and that prices for food would be going up $10 per plate. 3. I feel mislead by the venue manager as I made it clear that I was inquiring about 2016 prices and I found out only after the deposit was paid that those prices would be changing. This change in price will be putting us over budget for the reception. 4. That being said, it's possible the venue manager informed my parents before they paid that the prices would be changing. So my question - is there any way I can negotiate the price of the food? Thanks!

1. In what form were these correspondences? If via email, then make sure you retain all copies of these emails that might include information pertinent to your agreement.

2. Just to clarify: did your parents tell you after they put the deposit down "Oh, by the way, the venue manager said the prices are going to be going up" or was it a matter of "We were just told by the venue that your prices are going to be raised by 60%, and this information came after we put the deposit down"? Basically I'm asking if your parents knew before or after they paid the deposit on your behalf about the price increase. If they knew prior to putting the deposit down but didn't tell you until after the fact, you might be stuck.

3. Do you have proof (ie, emails) that you were quoted prices for your 2016 and were victim of a bait-and-switch after your paid them?

4. If this part is true, then you are probably stuck with your contract. Generally, contracts are enforceable if an "agent" of one party to the contract is appointed to make decisions pertaining to it (ie, your parents were "agents" for you). If your parents had new information about the agreement that would materially alter the contract but they agreed to those changes anyway, it's as if you agreed to those changes through them. Shame on your parents if that is the case, and I would have a serious conversation with them about how they plan to help you pay for something you couldn't afford that they locked you into without checking with you first. On the other hand, were your parents totally informed about your negotiations with the venue? Did they know you had discussed specific prices for 2016, and would be unable to commit to any agreement outside of those negotiated terms? If you didn't tell them "Make sure that the contract states X, Y, and Z before you pay the deposit," then that would be your oversight.

There's a lot of variables that come into play concerning whether or not you have any recourse. As to your final question of whether there is any way that you can negotiate for the food prices, the easy answer is yes--you can negotiate the food prices by doing just that, offering to negotiate. You could contact the venue and say something to the effect of, "I'm afraid there's been a misunderstanding regarding the booking of our wedding date with your venue in 2016. My negotiations with you confirmed that $____ would be the cost for food, and I've been told that after my deposit was put down, that price is going to change to an amount that is not affordable for us. Would you be willing to offer us a lower, fixed price point for the food that is closer to the terms we negotiated and will not be subject to change? Otherwise, we will have to search for a new venue." The worst case scenario is that they say no and you are out your deposit.

lnl1015 · October 2014

I hope someone signed a contract (and read it) before paying. This happened to me too. All of the entree options went up by $10-$25 per person since I signed my contract and a few other little perks were also eliminated. We made sure that everything was there when we signed so we still get everything we were expecting at the price we were expecting.

mountaingirl8 · October 2014

Thanks everyone for your replies! It seems that I erred when I didn't make it clear to my parents that this venue would only work for us at the prices that were initially quoted. Unfortunately the contract says nothing about prices other than the rental fee. To make matters more complicated, they are contributing about 50% of the budget (more like 35% if the prices do go up), and they like this venue so I feel as though we should stay with it - he who pays gets a say and all that. In any case, we will have to have a chat about all of this.

JellyBean52513 said:

mountaingirl8 said:

I hope I posted in the right forum - I'm looking for a way that follows etiquette to handle the following situation:

My FI and I are in a unique situation planning our wedding (June 2016) as we are living abroad until late next year. FI and I shopped online for a venue, and finally found one that we knew we would love, and best of all, it was right on budget! My parents offered to help with the planning since we aren't in the country, and went to book the venue and pay the deposit to secure the date on our behalf. 1. I had been corresponding with the venue's manager for a couple of weeks to confirm prices and other details. 2. My parents informed me after they paid the non-refundable deposit that the rental rate for 2016 had gone up 60%, and that prices for food would be going up $10 per plate. 3. I feel mislead by the venue manager as I made it clear that I was inquiring about 2016 prices and I found out only after the deposit was paid that those prices would be changing. This change in price will be putting us over budget for the reception. 4. That being said, it's possible the venue manager informed my parents before they paid that the prices would be changing. So my question - is there any way I can negotiate the price of the food? Thanks!

1. In what form were these correspondences? If via email, then make sure you retain all copies of these emails that might include information pertinent to your agreement.

2. Just to clarify: did your parents tell you after they put the deposit down "Oh, by the way, the venue manager said the prices are going to be going up" or was it a matter of "We were just told by the venue that your prices are going to be raised by 60%, and this information came after we put the deposit down"? Basically I'm asking if your parents knew before or after they paid the deposit on your behalf about the price increase. If they knew prior to putting the deposit down but didn't tell you until after the fact, you might be stuck.

3. Do you have proof (ie, emails) that you were quoted prices for your 2016 and were victim of a bait-and-switch after your paid them?

4. If this part is true, then you are probably stuck with your contract. Generally, contracts are enforceable if an "agent" of one party to the contract is appointed to make decisions pertaining to it (ie, your parents were "agents" for you). If your parents had new information about the agreement that would materially alter the contract but they agreed to those changes anyway, it's as if you agreed to those changes through them. Shame on your parents if that is the case, and I would have a serious conversation with them about how they plan to help you pay for something you couldn't afford that they locked you into without checking with you first. On the other hand, were your parents totally informed about your negotiations with the venue? Did they know you had discussed specific prices for 2016, and would be unable to commit to any agreement outside of those negotiated terms? If you didn't tell them "Make sure that the contract states X, Y, and Z before you pay the deposit," then that would be your oversight.

There's a lot of variables that come into play concerning whether or not you have any recourse. As to your final question of whether there is any way that you can negotiate for the food prices, the easy answer is yes--you can negotiate the food prices by doing just that, offering to negotiate. You could contact the venue and say something to the effect of, "I'm afraid there's been a misunderstanding regarding the booking of our wedding date with your venue in 2016. My negotiations with you confirmed that $____ would be the cost for food, and I've been told that after my deposit was put down, that price is going to change to an amount that is not affordable for us. Would you be willing to offer us a lower, fixed price point for the food that is closer to the terms we negotiated and will not be subject to change? Otherwise, we will have to search for a new venue." The worst case scenario is that they say no and you are out your deposit.

1. They were emails, so I will definitely be saving them!

2. I'm not actually sure what that situation was, but I will be asking them.

3. It's not completely explicit. I did make it clear that I was inquiring about 2016 but I didn't specifically say "what are your prices for 2016 and are they going up?"

4. We didn't tell them to make sure of anything before signing a contract, and I feel really stupid about that. Luckily we still have over a year to save, so we will adjust our plans for the next little while accordingly so we can pay for everything.

Thanks for that last little bit, I might actually copy and paste it and send it to the venue manager. I'm going to talk to my parents first though.

JoanE2012 · October 2014

I don't understand how a contract can say nothing about prices. What were your parents agreeing to when they signed?

theartistformerlyknownas · October 2014

JoanE2012 said:

I don't understand how a contract can say nothing about prices. What were your parents agreeing to when they signed?

Yeah this doesn't make sense to me either. Nor does an assumption that prices wouldn't go up two years from now.

Would the amount of deposit you'd lose be less than the increase in pricing that you can't afford? I'd try to call the venue, explain that there is some confusion as to the prices, and as you understood when you sent your agents to contract on your behalf the rate would be x rather than y, and see if you can get the rates reduced and then sign a contract specifically with those rates. And tell them "if we can't negotiate these, I'll have to cancel my contract" and then eat the deposit.

Otherwise... you have lots of time, maybe you can save up the extra money? :-\

mountaingirl8 · October 2014

JoanE2012 said:

I don't understand how a contract can say nothing about prices. What were your parents agreeing to when they signed?

The contract contained the rental fee and terms of the use of the venue specifically. It also stipulates that no outside catering is permitted, but does not go beyond that in terms of food. Since we are booking so far in advance, the exact details of food aren't being decided yet.

lolo883 said:

JoanE2012 said:

I don't understand how a contract can say nothing about prices. What were your parents agreeing to when they signed?

Yeah this doesn't make sense to me either. Nor does an assumption that prices wouldn't go up two years from now.

Would the amount of deposit you'd lose be less than the increase in pricing that you can't afford? I'd try to call the venue, explain that there is some confusion as to the prices, and as you understood when you sent your agents to contract on your behalf the rate would be x rather than y, and see if you can get the rates reduced and then sign a contract specifically with those rates. And tell them "if we can't negotiate these, I'll have to cancel my contract" and then eat the deposit.

Otherwise... you have lots of time, maybe you can save up the extra money? :-\

Thanks for your input! Just wanted to clarify - we didn't assume prices would not go up, just that the prices we were quoted were for the year we were inquiring about. I agree that prices agreed upon should be agreed upon in writing! So important! We are also going to be minding our finances even more carefully to save up an extra little bit in case it's needed - bonus of a long engagement, more flexibility when you make mistakes!

JellyBean52513 · October 2014

OP, I love that you're taking everything in stride and adjusting your plans to make everything work. Since your contract doesn't say anything specific about prices, now would be a great time to open that conversation with your venue. Here's an altered version of what I suggested above, feel free to copy & paste or edit as necessary

"We would like to discuss amending our original contract to include a provision for the food and beverage cost that is consistent with the prices we were quoted during our initial negotiations. You quoted us $___, and since the contract that we recently signed does not include any language as to the food and beverage cost, we'd like to add this price quote into it just so there aren't any unforeseen surprises or expenses as the wedding nears. Please let us know how we can proceed on this."

abbyj700 · October 2014

OP- when we signed with our venue it was something similar. The initial contract was for the venue only. We then did a tasting and selected our food. If prices would have changed - I image we would have changed what we were going to serve to more fit our budget. BUT if they would have changed the room minimum - they would have been in breach of our original contract.

summerbride2015 · October 2014

My H and I planned our wedding from across the country and had all contracts emailed to us to review so we could make any changes and ask questions, then once we approved of the contract. We signed it and scanned it to email back to them or we mailed it back to them with the check for a deposit. Maybe you should think about doing that for future vendors. And you could email the contracts to your parents to review as well before you sign them since they are contributing.

huskypuppy14 · October 2014

abbyj700 said:

OP- when we signed with our venue it was something similar. The initial contract was for the venue only. We then did a tasting and selected our food. If prices would have changed - I image we would have changed what we were going to serve to more fit our budget. BUT if they would have changed the room minimum - they would have been in breach of our original contract.

This was how our contract was too. We had a preliminary menu, where they did an example estimate and they picked the most expensive items, so we knew that was the maximum we would be spending. We ended up completely changing the menu, making the food cheaper (stations instead of plated) and the bar more expensive (open bar as opposed to beer and wine). We just had to meet a minimum which we did.

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