Quick! Wedding! daughters husband to be shipping off to Japan...many different family dynamics!

karenquam1962 · October 2014

Hello I'm very new to these discussion boards but I am in need of some advice soon. My daughter is getting married at the court house in a few weeks. Following 3 weeks after that we will have a reception for family only and a few close friends. I am very crafty and in charge of making the invitations. Ineed advice on the wording for the reception card announcing the wedding of our daughter and inviting guests to the reception.

My daughters father and I are divorced and both remarried...the reception will be held at my daughters Grandmother's house on her father's side. Her father and new wife just so happen to live there right now but my daughter does not live with either of us, she is renting a place of her own.

My new husband and I will be paying for the entire reception and anything to do with any financial aspect of the wedding at the court house or anything our daughter may need in order to get married. Her father claims he isn't prepared to help with anything.

The groom's parents cannot come to the reception because they live too far away and the happy couple will have a BIG reception with both sides in 2 years when the groom is able to return stateside from the Service from Japan.

I am just very unsure how to state the wording on this reception card due to the fact the kids will already be married, the many family dynamics, the fact that it's held at my X's house and Grandmother's house but I am fitting the bill for everything. Also the grooms parents are divorced but not remarried, He wants the reception card to go to his mother but not his father.....oh what to do. It's ALL about the marriage of our daughter and her new husband! So with that in mind any great ideas out there??? Thank you ALL in advance for your help. Confused~

CMGragain · October 2014

The reception you are planning is not your daughter's wedding reception. That must happen on her wedding day, and is for any guests at her ceremony. The most proper thing to do is to send out formal wedding announcements as soon as they are married.

Mr. and Mrs. John Stepfather
announce the marriage of her daughter
Bride's Full Name
to
Mr. Groom's Full Name
Date
City, State

No other information should be included. They are mailed immediately after the ceremony.

Then you can mail invitations to the celebration party.

Mr. and Mrs. John Stepfather
request the pleasure of your company
to celebrate the recent marriage of her daughter
Bride's Full Name
to
Mr. Groom's Full Name
Day, date
time
The Smith residence
Address
City, State

Remember, this is not a wedding reception. No "first dance", no bouquet tossing, no toasting "to the bride and groom". (To the newlyweds" is OK.) It is three weeks after the wedding. Your daughter will be a married woman. It is fine to show off pictures of their honeymoon.
You are hosting a party. The status of other members of the family is not important. You should thank the people who live in the house for letting you use their lovely home. Good luck.

LondonLisa · October 2014

Ditto CMGr. Also, note that when they come back from Japan, they are welcome to throw a 2 year anniversary party, but don't turn it into a wedding redo. They are husband and wife so no need to pretend that this is a "wedding". Their wedding will be at the court house and I'm sure it will be lovely. Would you throw a graduation party 2 years after the event for your daughter?

My grandparents were married in a similar fashion because of World War 2- they had a big, 200 person cathedral wedding planned, but then my grandfather received orders. My grandmother took the train all the way to Scotland (where he was stationed) and were married in the base chapel and went out to dinner afterwards. She loved to joke that her chief bridesmaid was an Irish Lance Bombardier who happened to be in front of the chapel when they realised they needed a witness (he held her handbag). I love that story because it shows true love, and she would have been offended at the thought of a need to have a "real wedding reception" after that.

[Deleted User] · October 2014

What about "John Smith and April Jones (her maiden name to help people recognize invite) along with their families would like you to join them in a celebration of their marriage that took place on November 15, 2014. Please join us on December 1, 2014 at ..............."

southernbelle0915 · October 2014

I agree mostly with CMGr if you're planning to mail party invites AFTER the wedding, but if you want to mail them BEFORE their wedding, it's not accurate to say "recent marriage". I agree with everything she says about party etiquette. Do not pretend the party is a wedding reception - it's not. It's a party to celebrate a marriage that will have happened a few weeks prior. Your daughter would look foolish and insult guests by pretending it's a wedding reception, or even worse - doing a ceremony re-do.

Wedding announcements are always optional. If you decide to send them in addition to party invitations, CMGr's wording is perfect.

Since this isn't a wedding, normal wedding wording isn't necessary. I think @Erikan73's wording is fine since this is basically just a party.

Quick! Wedding! daughters husband to be shipping off to Japan...many different family dynamics!

Re: Quick! Wedding! daughters husband to be shipping off to Japan...many different family dynamics!

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