Wedding Etiquette Forum

Argh the post office is terrible

So I mailed my invitations out a few weeks ago for my December 6 wedding, and my RSVP date is in two weeks. I've heard of two instances of people not receiving invitations, and I haven't gotten them returned, so they are lost in post office limbo somewhere. Now I'm super paranoid that other people haven't gotten theirs. Pretty much everyone is OOT so they all received STDs, so I'm worried that people think I'm rude and didn't send them an invitation.

What do I do? I feel like it's not the right idea to email everyone who hasn't responded yet to see if they got an invitation because it could be seen as pressuring people to send their responses. Should I wait until the RSVP date and then contact those who we haven't heard from? Then I'm worried that if people didn't get invitations they won't be able to come because of the cost of travel.

Re: Argh the post office is terrible

  • ViczaesarViczaesar Central Coast, CA member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    So I mailed my invitations out a few weeks ago for my December 6 wedding, and my RSVP date is in two weeks. I've heard of two instances of people not receiving invitations, and I haven't gotten them returned, so they are lost in post office limbo somewhere. Now I'm super paranoid that other people haven't gotten theirs. Pretty much everyone is OOT so they all received STDs, so I'm worried that people think I'm rude and didn't send them an invitation.

    What do I do? I feel like it's not the right idea to email everyone who hasn't responded yet to see if they got an invitation because it could be seen as pressuring people to send their responses. Should I wait until the RSVP date and then contact those who we haven't heard from? Then I'm worried that if people didn't get invitations they won't be able to come because of the cost of travel.

    I'm sorry, I'd be stressed about this too.  Do you have a family grapevine?  Could you begin spreading word that some of your invitations have gotten lost?  In terms of officially contacting people I would still wait until the RSVP date. 



  • ViczaesarViczaesar Central Coast, CA member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    Actually, I change my opinion.  How many people did you invite?  If it were a manageable number I would call everybody just to confirm that they received your invitation.  Not to say anything about whether or not they're coming or the RSVP date, just that you heard that some of your invitations didn't reach the recipients and you want to make sure that they received theirs.



  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Yeah, I think I would go ahead and follow up with people, too. I would be stressed out.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • I'd start contacting ppl via email or facebook or phone call just to confirm they got their invite. Just be truthful that some went missing and you wanted to confirm they got it.
  • I sent out my invitations a week and a half ago for our mid-january wedding, and nobody has received them yet and I am starting to feel worrried... which is nothing compared to your situation.

    I agree with the others that a phone call is the best way to contact your guests just to check if they got your invitations.  If you don't have some of their phone numbers, maybe you could e-mail them instead.  I hope this won't happen to my invitations as well!
  • ViczaesarViczaesar Central Coast, CA member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I sent out my invitations a week and a half ago for our mid-january wedding, and nobody has received them yet and I am starting to feel worrried... which is nothing compared to your situation.

    I agree with the others that a phone call is the best way to contact your guests just to check if they got your invitations.  If you don't have some of their phone numbers, maybe you could e-mail them instead.  I hope this won't happen to my invitations as well!
    Why on earth did you send invitations in October for a mid-January wedding?  That's way too early.



  • I've reached out to the people on my side who haven't responded yet, and FI is contacting his side - just to check in to make sure people have gotten their invites. I also emailed all of the details about the ceremony, reception, hotel, meals, etc. to those two who haven't gotten their invites and just told them to contact me before the deadline with their response.

    I really wonder where these invites are... the thing that gets me is that one of the people who didn't get an invite has a roommate who also is invited to the wedding, and the roommate got the invitation. I definitely wrote the same addresses on both, so who knows where in mail-land those invites may have gone.
  • We sent out STDs to 9 addresses. In the first batch, 2 did not make it. We re-sent those and 1 of the 2 did not make it. One guest we had to send 3 different STDs until he finally received his. Only one of those 3 missing STDs were returned to us. (And the returned one looked like someone's dog got a hold of it.) It seemed pretty ridiculous. We're hoping we have better luck when we send out our formal invitations. 
  • fwtx5815fwtx5815 cowboys nation member
    500 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
    Viczaesar said:



    I sent out my invitations a week and a half ago for our mid-january wedding, and nobody has received them yet and I am starting to feel worrried... which is nothing compared to your situation.

    I agree with the others that a phone call is the best way to contact your guests just to check if they got your invitations.  If you don't have some of their phone numbers, maybe you could e-mail them instead.  I hope this won't happen to my invitations as well!

    Why on earth did you send invitations in October for a mid-January wedding?  That's way too early.




    Hoping this isn't a case of B-listing, and that this is a (very exotic) destination wedding, over a holiday weekend (MLK?) and that's why they were mailed so early. Because yes. Way too soon

    ----


     fka dallasbetch 


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  • Viczaesar said:
    I sent out my invitations a week and a half ago for our mid-january wedding, and nobody has received them yet and I am starting to feel worrried... which is nothing compared to your situation.

    I agree with the others that a phone call is the best way to contact your guests just to check if they got your invitations.  If you don't have some of their phone numbers, maybe you could e-mail them instead.  I hope this won't happen to my invitations as well!
    Why on earth did you send invitations in October for a mid-January wedding?  That's way too early.
    yes it may seem to early but the up coming season is the worse with mail with gifts being sent and cards etc. i can see why sending them a tad early would be actually help you in the long run. 
    image
  • jlemmo89 said:
    Viczaesar said:
    I sent out my invitations a week and a half ago for our mid-january wedding, and nobody has received them yet and I am starting to feel worrried... which is nothing compared to your situation.

    I agree with the others that a phone call is the best way to contact your guests just to check if they got your invitations.  If you don't have some of their phone numbers, maybe you could e-mail them instead.  I hope this won't happen to my invitations as well!
    Why on earth did you send invitations in October for a mid-January wedding?  That's way too early.
    yes it may seem to early but the up coming season is the worse with mail with gifts being sent and cards etc. i can see why sending them a tad early would be actually help you in the long run. 
    I don't know about that.  I'm much more excited to regularly check my mail when I'm expecting Christmas cards and gifts than I am right now.  And I think with all the extra employees companies get to work around the holidays, that time of year might actually be BETTER for mail.
    Viczaesar
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