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April 2015 Weddings

Ceremony location Dilemma

Hey Ladies,

So, on Friday we ran into a little issue with our wedding venue. This was kind of the last straw for us with them...they have a lot of "rules" that they request bride/groom follow if using their venue. Let me start off by saying, the venue is not cheap- it is a very beautiful church and we loved it from day 1 even with the strick rules. Long story short, I submitted a song for approval (Luther Vandross, "So Amazing) and their music department said it was "not appropriate" for the ceremony and would be "better suited" for our reception. Our intention was to have a friend of ours sing the song with piano accompaniment. They say to me, "its ok to have the song played by piano but not sung." 
I don't get it, my fiance doesn't get it and as mentioned before, we are paying A LOT of money just to use this space and keep getting told NO to this and NO to that. Out of frustration I asked the Event Manager for a refund of our deposit and with pretty much 5 months to go we would just need to find a new ceremony location! Argh! 

Of course they don't want to give us our deposit back, and they aren't really trying to provide a feasible solution- the songs that they DO allow are.....let's just say, its not at all our taste. I told my fiance that I regret booking them- and I don't want to sound superficial by wanting to go somewhere else over a song. But it has literally been a lot of back and forth with them at this point I am done! 

I'd prefer they just give us our deposit back and we find somewhere else OR let us have the damn song! Ugh! Its one song for goodness sake, and the song I want to be sung as I walk down the aisle!

Re: Ceremony location Dilemma

  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches the Northern Plains member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    Honestly, I can't believe they wouldn't have given you some information from Day 1 on what kinds of music were appropriate/not appropriate for a church. I've been working closely with our pastor on choosing our hymns. I'm not surprised they nixed the Luther Vandross because it really isn't church-appropriate, but I'm sorry you're dealing with all of this.
  • If you have the money and can find a place you like, I'd say move it. You want your wedding to be a reflection of you..not the restricted you. I know it can be hard and we have lost about $3500 because I changed cities but I had to do what was best for US and not everyone else. 
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  • Update: We are going to look at another venue tomorrow that is very similar style wise to our already booked location but their rules are much more "user friendly". 

    It has been back and forth drama with the Management (and the Pastor who btw was very rude towards me as well) from the church we already booked, and if we walk we will forfeit $1,000. 

    I sooooooo wish my fiance and I would've taken more time scouting other options before booking them, but hey ya live and ya learn! 
  • Yup...in my opinion it's better to have a less stressed wedding and everything you want than worry about money. 
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