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Wedding Woes

Morning

The big chill is on its way. 

BIL and SIL are coming for dinner tonight.  BIL hasn't seend the new house yet.  I made so much chili that my crockpot almost can't contain it all.  Whoops. 

I'd rather pay more taxes than pay book fees. It's a racket.  And when you transfer schools in the middle of the year, it's even worse.  I had to pay both schools AND his current school's treasurer (sp?) just called because I paid too much.  Can't they just put the excess in his lunch account or something?

Also, random thought of the day.  My mom board is having a 'debate' about opening presents at kid's bday parties.  Is not opening gifts the norm now?  I mean, I remember *wanting* my friend to open their stuff so they could see what I gave them.  People are all, "Oh it's boring for the kids to sit around and watch the bday boy/girl open their stuff."  Well, it's expensive to host a party and provide food and entertainment for all your kids.  They can't sit for a half hour for gift opening? 

Re: Morning

  • Morning. I'm sitting on a teleconference about audits. :/

    I am oddly excited for tonight. DH ordered How to Train Your Dragon 2 months ago, and today it arrives. We're eating pizza and watching the movie for Family Movie Night.

    I plan on opening DD's presents at her birthday. She's 1. I feed everyone, you ooh and ahh at my child. That's how this works.
  • We have a dusting of snow this morning.  Good thing we took advantage of the nice weather yesterday.

    I haven't decided if I want to make chili or chicken enchilada casserole for dinner.  Both are pretty easy (though we've never had the casserole before) and both sound good.  I'll do one today and one tomorrow.

    Open the damn presents.  Make the kids sit politely.  That's how birthday parties work.
  • I remember loving to watch the present opening, because I wanted to know if they liked my present that I picked.  DUH! 

    Yes, the dusting of snow.  It was a bit slippery too.  With vacation already accounting for 2 days this week, I'm technically on "hump day" and I only have 8 hours of work a day.  SO that is fantastic.  What is NOT fantastic?  I'm coming down with a cold.  So I'll be chugging oj, taking bee pollen, drinking green tea, sleeping like a mo-fo and downing oregano oil like a champ.


  • The not opening presents is stupid, that's part of the party!  We just had my 6 year old GD's frozen party a week ago, and she opened the presents, the kids were all excited and crowded around.  I think they have some jerk kids if they can't spend a few minutes of time to watch somebody else get gifts. 

    Its still going to be in the 70's today, but the rest of the week only in the 40/50's. 

     

  • It's cold, but surprisingly, there wasn't frost on the ground or cars yet.  I'm sure that's due to change.

    What the what at not opening presents?  The childless one will say it:  That's dumb.  I actually kind hate that B&Gs at weddings don't open their gifts b/c I like seeing their faces at my gift and I like seeing other gifts people got them.

    Is it Friday yet?  I'm ready to get off this train.
  • Some people have brought up the whole using an outside party place thing and they want to give the kids more time to play or whatever.  I get that.  But we've only done party place bday parties here and there, most bday parties are at the house.  

    Also, the whole 'this might be boring' arguement really burns my toast.  How the hell is your kid going to ever learn that a) some things in life are boring, b) sometimes it's about someone else and you just need to be happy for them for nothing in return, and c) that it's not all about them all the time?  
  • Some people have brought up the whole using an outside party place thing and they want to give the kids more time to play or whatever.  I get that.  But we've only done party place bday parties here and there, most bday parties are at the house.  

    Also, the whole 'this might be boring' arguement really burns my toast.  How the hell is your kid going to ever learn that a) some things in life are boring, b) sometimes it's about someone else and you just need to be happy for them for nothing in return, and c) that it's not all about them all the time?  
    Yes.  First, I don't believe the "boring" argument.  I think most kids like to see the toys their friend is getting.  But guess what?  Life is FULL of boring things we don't want to sit through, but you just have to.
  • No way.  Toys are not boring.  Kids get so excited about toys even if they aren't their own, like "HEY, I have that toy, SO MUCH FUN!"  and "OH, can I play that with you!?"  I know this happens, so "boring"?  isn't a valid argument.
  • Well, I guess I'll be the stupid that hates the present opening part at a party. Just feels unseemly.

    It started one time when we had alluded not to bring presents, only all but two people brought them anyway. Yeah, way to make a guest feel out of the loop and covertly shamed. Trotting out and inventorying all the presents in front of everyone.

    Especially when someone gifts DD a live fish and I don't have to worry about hiding the f bombs or the look of WTF from anyone. And no general company has to hear me betch about going to Petsmart at 7:30.

    Also, I think some of that is also due to the TIGHT timing of some places if you hold a birthday party there. Like 1.75 hours. Not 2, not whenever you're done. Vacate EXACTLY at 11:45.

    As a complete aside, I foresee a big batch of posole in the crockpot veeeeeery soon.
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  • I PPH y'all for the validation.  ;)  This whole thing makes me feel very curmudgeonly and all, "THIS is what's wrong with kids these days!"

  • team dharma.

    i dislike it because it can create a "keeping up with the joneses" effect and it feels unseemly. i dislike gifts being an event and then trying to say "it's the thought that counts."
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  • Unrelated stupid rant: one of the schools we applied to for Kindergarten is having their lottery today. The website just says they do it today- no time. I keep clicking refresh to see if we got in or are waitlisted, but it just says that results are not available until after the lottery. Just tell me when that is damn it! I'm impatient.
  • Yes, I remember asking my mom to buy more expensive gifts because they were going to open them at the party. Funny, how I'm just remembering that.

    That peer pressure on Mom didn't work.

     

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  • I land w/ Dharma simply because of the $ differential that has shown up.  Economically diverse and all that.

    It kinda sucks to have someone open a small giftcard and a $10 art set right after the *other* aunty gifted them a live pony (It wasn't really a pony, I dont' remember what it was other than incredibly expensive and showy)--and the kids can *try* to not be a PITA, but 7 year olds aren't exactly known for their tact.

    But I also know that when I know I've done well w/ a gift (regardless of the cost), I love love LOVE watching the receiver open it.  So, eh, 6 of 1, 1/2 dozen and all that,


    On my own life's topics
    I am sorely coming down with a cold.  I keep pretending I"m not, but I am.

    An employee who I *SPECIFICALLY* told how to call in if he couldn't make it didn't realize I was back in town and instead of calling the correct number, texted the other sup. at 5:15 this morning.  NOt happy.

    Another employee was busted sleeping on the job--and since I'm the subsitute supervisor, I have no idea what to do with this.  (and I can't fire this perosn-I'm short staffed as it is)



  • I understand the special circumstances (party places with time limits or there's a 'no gifts please' on the invite), but a run of the mill friend party where most (if not all) people bring gifts? IDK, I guess kids (I'm talking the 10 and under crowd) don't really notice if a friend gives them something that's $20 (one nerf gun) vs. $50 (a larger nerf gun + two packs of 'bullets').  They get excited about it all.  And as long as you're not calling out the people who didn't bring something, I don't see the big deal. 


  • I'm on board with not opening gifts at the party. We've held Wolverine's last 2 birthday parties at her gym, and they're only 90 minutes long. I'm not going to take time out of the kids playing/eating junk to make them watch her open gifts. The norm in our circle is that the kids open stuff after the party - even the few that had parties at home. Maybe it's because of the age range of most of the guests (3-4yo) but, I think it's moreso about letting the kids play and have fun than sit still and watch someone open a bunch of toys. 

    I'm also in agreement with the "keeping up with the Jones'" feel in regards to gifts - I wouldn't want someone to feel bad if they didn't bring a gift/couldn't afford something/didn't feel their gift "measured up." 

    The positive side of opening gifts in person would be seeing that the kid was excited about it (positive for the giver) - or having the child be able to say "thank you" in person (positive for the receiver.) I was making videos for the family members so they could see Wolverine open their gifts and so she could say thank you. 
  • I am Team Dharma/Barbie. 

    1.  Our circle never opens presents at parties, either.  The only exception was DD's new best friend, and they just moved here from Indy.  So maybe it's a regional thing?  (I remember presents being opened at parties when I was a kid.)

    2.  I'm not calling Team Conn AW-y, I'm just saying that for me, it feels kind of AW-y:  "Look at everything I got!"/"Look at what I gave you!"

    3.  For family gatherings, we do open presents during the party, because there usually aren't a ton, and that's what the grandparents et al. really love to see.

    4.  For kid parties, as Barbie mentioned, we have a finite party window, and I feel like opening presents not only eats into that time, but it disrupts the flow of the party.  Sort of a dead stop in the middle of everything.  Especially with a dozen or so kids, x 2-3 minutes per present, that's easily a half hour of present opening instead of swimming/jumping/playing games.

    5.  Finally, I think it's easier for the Woozle to appreciate her gifts when she's opening them at home afterward, the sugar rush has faded, and there aren't a bunch of kids running and shouting around her. 

    TEAM DHARMA, woo!
  • I've never held a birthday party outside of our home.  We open presents.  Sometimes FIL and sMIL go overboard.  When they do they give the gifts outside of the party. 

    We've been to parties outside the home that have gone both ways. 6let enjoys seeing them open the gift, but is also fine to play.

  • Heffalump said:
    I am Team Dharma/Barbie. 

    1.  Our circle never opens presents at parties, either.  The only exception was DD's new best friend, and they just moved here from Indy.  So maybe it's a regional thing?  (I remember presents being opened at parties when I was a kid.)

    2.  I'm not calling Team Conn AW-y, I'm just saying that for me, it feels kind of AW-y:  "Look at everything I got!"/"Look at what I gave you!"



    Well, I'm in Indy and this issue was brought up on my local mom board...So it's not a regional thing...But a personal preference thing.  :)

    #2--I get your point, but in my experience that's never been an issue.  The kids all clamor to see what the bday kid got and the bday kid gets to feel special and then they either go back to playing or open a few new things and then get back to playing.  
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