Chit Chat

Awesome FILs brag

I feel like I do PLENTY of bitching and venting about my family and I don't do enough bragging about my awesome FILs.

FFIL sat at the kitchen table with me over the Thanksgiving weekend and chatted. And he actually LISTENED to me and didn't tell me how wrong or dumb I was, and he didn't interrupt me to ramble on about himself all night. I made some kind of reference to an obscure historical event and he then took the time to tell me how "Bright and intelligent" of a "young lady" I am, and that he loves chatting with me! It's like everything I always wanted from my own dad but never got.

FSIL has been super amazing and supportive. She told me a few months ago that she was so excited because she had always wanted a sister. Now she's working with FMIL to plan a bridal shower for me! Today I got a Christmas card in the mail from FSIL and her husband. There was a hand-written message at the bottom that said she "can't wait for the big day! Everyone in the family is so eager to call you Mrs. [FI's last name]!" Not gonna lie, it made me tear up.

Who else has a brag? It makes me so happy to know that there are such awesome families out there, and I get to be a part of one in less than 5 months! :)


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Re: Awesome FILs brag

  • Aww that's so sweet!!!  It's so great to marry into a fabulous family!

    A couple months ago, my FSIL gave me a handkerchief.  She told me that her grandmother, mom, and she had all used to to wrap their bouquets, and wanted to know if I would want to use it as well.  That one definitely made me cry, especially because it was only a couple months after their grandmother had died.  They're just so sweet and have really taken me in.

    Also, FILs drove 3.5 hours each way to see me graduate from law school, and sent me flowers when I took the bar.  My own brother couldn't manage to drive 15 minutes to see me graduate, and they traveled so far and took a day off work to see me!!  It's one of the things that has made me feel the most loved.  They really didn't have to come in for it - they knew that - and they did anyway.  And they were SO proud of me.  More proud than I was of myself,

    Also - they always make sure my mom has Kosher food to eat, and they always make sure they have non-pork food for me (I don't totally keep Kosher, but I don't eat pork).  They're just so thoughtful.
  • dcbride86 said:
    Aww that's so sweet!!!  It's so great to marry into a fabulous family!

    A couple months ago, my FSIL gave me a handkerchief.  She told me that her grandmother, mom, and she had all used to to wrap their bouquets, and wanted to know if I would want to use it as well.  That one definitely made me cry, especially because it was only a couple months after their grandmother had died.  They're just so sweet and have really taken me in.

    Also, FILs drove 3.5 hours each way to see me graduate from law school, and sent me flowers when I took the bar.  My own brother couldn't manage to drive 15 minutes to see me graduate, and they traveled so far and took a day off work to see me!!  It's one of the things that has made me feel the most loved.  They really didn't have to come in for it - they knew that - and they did anyway.  And they were SO proud of me.  More proud than I was of myself,

    Also - they always make sure my mom has Kosher food to eat, and they always make sure they have non-pork food for me (I don't totally keep Kosher, but I don't eat pork).  They're just so thoughtful.
    Aw! The handkerchief thing almost made me tear up! That is just too awesome. I LOVE family heirlooms! So much history and so much meaning, even with just a piece of fabric.

    FI's parents don't know much about Jews and the first time I went camping with them, they told FI that they refused to bring hotdogs cuz they didn't want to offend me, and they wanted to make sure I could eat the food they brought. FI kept telling them that I'm not kosher, and that I eat hotdogs all the time, but they still would not bring the damn hotdogs lol. I thought it was really funny but also so sweet and so adorable! I loved that they were trying to be respectful of the fact that I'm Jewish. Little did they know back then that I'm the worst Jew ever!
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  • Oh novella, you deserve nice family in your life!
  • Oh novella, you deserve nice family in your life!
    Aw thank you! :) 
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  • dcbride86 said:
    Aww that's so sweet!!!  It's so great to marry into a fabulous family!

    A couple months ago, my FSIL gave me a handkerchief.  She told me that her grandmother, mom, and she had all used to to wrap their bouquets, and wanted to know if I would want to use it as well.  That one definitely made me cry, especially because it was only a couple months after their grandmother had died.  They're just so sweet and have really taken me in.

    Also, FILs drove 3.5 hours each way to see me graduate from law school, and sent me flowers when I took the bar.  My own brother couldn't manage to drive 15 minutes to see me graduate, and they traveled so far and took a day off work to see me!!  It's one of the things that has made me feel the most loved.  They really didn't have to come in for it - they knew that - and they did anyway.  And they were SO proud of me.  More proud than I was of myself,

    Also - they always make sure my mom has Kosher food to eat, and they always make sure they have non-pork food for me (I don't totally keep Kosher, but I don't eat pork).  They're just so thoughtful.
    Aw! The handkerchief thing almost made me tear up! That is just too awesome. I LOVE family heirlooms! So much history and so much meaning, even with just a piece of fabric.

    FI's parents don't know much about Jews and the first time I went camping with them, they told FI that they refused to bring hotdogs cuz they didn't want to offend me, and they wanted to make sure I could eat the food they brought. FI kept telling them that I'm not kosher, and that I eat hotdogs all the time, but they still would not bring the damn hotdogs lol. I thought it was really funny but also so sweet and so adorable! I loved that they were trying to be respectful of the fact that I'm Jewish. Little did they know back then that I'm the worst Jew ever!


    Aww that's really sweet!  It's so nice when a family really makes an effort to embrace your culture.

     

    I LOVE family heirloom, too!  They're so meaningful, and it was so beyond sweet of FSIL to offer to let me use the handkerchief.  My engagement ring is also an heirloom - it was my great grandmothers - and that made my engagement that much more special to me.  I had known I would have the ring for my whole life, and it was finally mine!  The ring that had been worn by my great grandmother, grandma, and mom was now mine.  I also told FI he couldn't get rid of me now because even if he decides he hates me at some point, he can't jinx the ring lol

  • My FBIL and FSIL are awesome.  My FBIL reminds me so much of my big brother, my FI and I keep joking that once they meet, they will be besties.  My FSIL is super sweet, she's from Japan and doesn't have that many close friends (she and my FBIL moved to DC a couple years ago and she hasn't found the same Japanese community there she had in NY) so I've always made it a point to try to be close and we text every few days and always have fun while visiting.

    My FMIL and FFIL recently gave me a gorgeous gift of diamond earrings as a "welcome to the family" present and have been very welcoming of me (and my family.)
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  • Yeah FIL's are the best! I love my parents even with all their crazy shit. But they always lie to me, and never made me feel loved, accepted, and proud of my achievements. 

     My FIL's have welcomed me into the family, and they are so loving and caring. They make me feel like their daughter/sister. I get along great with all of them. 


    For the past 2 years, even FI's grandma got me Xmas gifts. I was so embarrassed and happy, she doesnt have a lot of money and she got me a gift anyways :')

    means a lot to me. 

    I agree with other posters, you deserve this novella, with all the crap in your family, I am glad you are getting a new one like you deserve, full of love and appreciation.


  • JaniV123 said:
    Yeah FIL's are the best! I love my parents even with all their crazy shit. But they always lie to me, and never made me feel loved, accepted, and proud of my achievements. 

     My FIL's have welcomed me into the family, and they are so loving and caring. They make me feel like their daughter/sister. I get along great with all of them. 


    For the past 2 years, even FI's grandma got me Xmas gifts. I was so embarrassed and happy, she doesnt have a lot of money and she got me a gift anyways :')

    means a lot to me. 

    I agree with other posters, you deserve this novella, with all the crap in your family, I am glad you are getting a new one like you deserve, full of love and appreciation.
    Thanks! I do feel like a got really lucky! It's the family I always wanted :) Yay! 
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  • Aww. That is really sweet. 

    I really have an awesome MIL. She welcomed me with open arms from day one. She takes an interest in my life, she cares about my family (she's become really great friends with my parents). And bonus, she sends me clothes like every other month. And she's got really good taste. 
  • Aww. That is really sweet. 

    I really have an awesome MIL. She welcomed me with open arms from day one. She takes an interest in my life, she cares about my family (she's become really great friends with my parents). And bonus, she sends me clothes like every other month. And she's got really good taste. 
    OK that is just way too awesome! 
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  • My FMIL and her boyfriend came over at 11 last night because I had mentioned we ran out of hot water Tuesday and boyfriend couldn't sleep... so he went out, bought a new element and came over to change it.
  • Not gonna lie, I honestly thought that when my FILs started finding out how fucking nuts and awful my family can be, they would reject me. They'd be like "who is this awful girl from this awful family? We want nothing to do with her!" And I also thought a few times that maybe FI would leave me, because who the hell wants in-laws like that? They piss him off almost as much as they piss me off, and I don't know how he puts up with them. 

    But really the opposite happened; I think his family feels bad that I have to deal with that mess, so they've welcomed me into their family even more to try and compensate for my shitty family. They're like my safe haven where I know I'll have a friendly, loving place to go and won't be treated like crap no matter what. And they're all so fun to hang out with! I actually get really excited to go to FIL's house. I dread going to my parents' house and have panic attacks on the way there. It is such a nice change from what I'm used to. 
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  • On my birthday this year my FMIL gave me a 'To our wonderful Daughter in Law' card. And wrote in it that even though it's not 'official' yet, she feels like I am the daughter she never had and am more than just a spouse, that I am family. I cried so hard. haha.


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  • Not gonna lie, I honestly thought that when my FILs started finding out how fucking nuts and awful my family can be, they would reject me. They'd be like "who is this awful girl from this awful family? We want nothing to do with her!" And I also thought a few times that maybe FI would leave me, because who the hell wants in-laws like that? They piss him off almost as much as they piss me off, and I don't know how he puts up with them. 

    But really the opposite happened; I think his family feels bad that I have to deal with that mess, so they've welcomed me into their family even more to try and compensate for my shitty family. They're like my safe haven where I know I'll have a friendly, loving place to go and won't be treated like crap no matter what. And they're all so fun to hang out with! I actually get really excited to go to FIL's house. I dread going to my parents' house and have panic attacks on the way there. It is such a nice change from what I'm used to. 


    This made me tear up (which is pretty awkward, since I'm at work).  It's so wonderful that you found a loving family who treats you the way you deserve.  It's even more wonderful that you appreciate each other for the amazing qualities each brings to the other.  You deserve this and to be happy!!

    Of course, it's sad that you don't get along as well with your family.  There are so many times I've been SO jealous of FI's relationship with his sister.  They get along so well!  They love hanging out!!  And my brother can't bother to remember my birthday or let me know that he's not going to my law school graduation.  I'm so happy that I now have this amazing FSIL, but I am still jealous that I don't have it with my own brother.  However, I think that makes me all the more thankful for her.  And thank YOU @novella1186 - for reminding me how thankful I should be.  I just texted FILs to remind them that I love them.  It's wonderful to marry into such a loving family <3

  • Love both of my future in-laws- especially mom.  She is a friend, and she even asked my fiance once if she could still stay in contact with me if he and I were to ever split.

    I don't read the newspaper (unless it's the VERY local / independent one for my town so I know about the activities coming up), but she will cut out articles for me that she thinks I might find interesting- and I almost always do.

    She takes an active interest in what I'm up to, and my job, and all those things.

    I have more in common with her than my own mom.  Love my mom, but we are so, so opposite...
  • amelishaamelisha member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    edited December 2014
    I'm glad to read some good family-related news from you.

    I love my FILs (his dad and stepmom, anyway. His mom is a bit more difficult but that's all to do with my FI's relationship with her, she thankfully likes me.) I actually spent three hours having dinner and talking with his stepmom last night. We were just going to figure out who was doing what for Christmas dinner but we got to talking and couldn't stop. 

    I feel so, so lucky that she's part of the family and that FI loves her too, because she and I are very alike - which makes sense because FI and his dad are pretty much the same person - and we get along extremely well. She didn't marry FI's dad until FI was 20 so it's much more of a friend relationship than a parent thing, but it's awesome. And it is helpful to have some support in dealing with FI's occasionally difficult sister too.

    FI's dad is great as well. I think it helps that they are so, so alike but he just treats me like child #3 and is such a great guy.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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  • dcbride86 said:
    Not gonna lie, I honestly thought that when my FILs started finding out how fucking nuts and awful my family can be, they would reject me. They'd be like "who is this awful girl from this awful family? We want nothing to do with her!" And I also thought a few times that maybe FI would leave me, because who the hell wants in-laws like that? They piss him off almost as much as they piss me off, and I don't know how he puts up with them. 

    But really the opposite happened; I think his family feels bad that I have to deal with that mess, so they've welcomed me into their family even more to try and compensate for my shitty family. They're like my safe haven where I know I'll have a friendly, loving place to go and won't be treated like crap no matter what. And they're all so fun to hang out with! I actually get really excited to go to FIL's house. I dread going to my parents' house and have panic attacks on the way there. It is such a nice change from what I'm used to. 


    This made me tear up (which is pretty awkward, since I'm at work).  It's so wonderful that you found a loving family who treats you the way you deserve.  It's even more wonderful that you appreciate each other for the amazing qualities each brings to the other.  You deserve this and to be happy!!

    Of course, it's sad that you don't get along as well with your family.  There are so many times I've been SO jealous of FI's relationship with his sister.  They get along so well!  They love hanging out!!  And my brother can't bother to remember my birthday or let me know that he's not going to my law school graduation.  I'm so happy that I now have this amazing FSIL, but I am still jealous that I don't have it with my own brother.  However, I think that makes me all the more thankful for her.  And thank YOU @novella1186 - for reminding me how thankful I should be.  I just texted FILs to remind them that I love them.  It's wonderful to marry into such a loving family <3

    That is so sweet! yay! 
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  • OMG I don't know how I forgot this - my FAVORITE thing FMIL has ever said -

    I first met FIs mom and stepdad at dinner in DC.  Apparently, right after I left, FMIL turned to stepdad and said "he's met his match!  She's it.  And if he doesn't realize it, YOU'RE going to need to knock some sense into him!"

    Every time she tells that story I tear up.  She just welcomed me so quickly.  My mom did NOT have the same luck with my dad's mom.  She didn't want her son to marry a Jew, and hated my mom for it.  Sometimes I just can't believe how much I lucked ot.

  • dcbride86 said:

    OMG I don't know how I forgot this - my FAVORITE thing FMIL has ever said -

    I first met FIs mom and stepdad at dinner in DC.  Apparently, right after I left, FMIL turned to stepdad and said "he's met his match!  She's it.  And if he doesn't realize it, YOU'RE going to need to knock some sense into him!"

    Every time she tells that story I tear up.  She just welcomed me so quickly.  My mom did NOT have the same luck with my dad's mom.  She didn't want her son to marry a Jew, and hated my mom for it.  Sometimes I just can't believe how much I lucked ot.

    Aw I love that!  I remember the first time I met FSIL, we had just gotten to a beach house on the coast where a big group of people were vacationing together (FSIL invited FI, and he of course brought me). I had been sitting and chatting with FSIL for about 15 minutes (so literally I had known her for 15 minutes) and suddenly she says, "You're the best girl my brother has ever dated! I can already tell you're great!" It was awesome. (I found out later that his past 3 girlfriends were certifiably insane, but still, it was a great compliment!) 
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  • Oh I LOVE this entire thread!!!! I've been reading horror stories left and right on these boards about drama between families, in laws, wedding party, etc, and these warm my heart!
    I am truly lucky. I come from a fairly craptastic family. I am close to my mom and my sister, and that's it. My dad's family is just absolute trash and I no longer speak to any of them, so I've also had the "FI is going to leave me because my family is nuts. His family will think I'm beneath them if they find out..." But they have been so wonderful! I moved 700 miles to be with FI (then boyfriend). I knew nobody. He had his entire family and friends from childhood all the way through college up here. I had never met any of his friends and family so I was super nervous. His sister & father & friends have been so amazing and welcoming to me.
    His mother passed away about 6 years before I met him, so I've never met her. When he proposed, he had 5 family rings. He and his sister, both crying, could not decide which one I would like, so his sister finally said "Just take them all and let her pick." The rings had belonged to various women in the family, including one that had been passed from their father's mother to their own mother. I called to tell his dad and his sister he had officially proposed and which ring I had chosen, and thanked them profusely for sharing such special jewelry with me and welcoming me into the family. Both of them responded that they couldn't think of a more deserving woman, and both of them cried with me. They both told me they knew his mother would have loved me, too.
    Fast forward to my mom meeting his family for the first time a couple months later. I mentioned at some point that I was going to take a piece from my mom's dress to wrap around my bouquet. FSIL said "I have our mom's dress, and I would be happy to give you a piece of that if you would like as well." It was so touching and meaningful. Everybody was crying at that.
  • Oh I LOVE this entire thread!!!! I've been reading horror stories left and right on these boards about drama between families, in laws, wedding party, etc, and these warm my heart!
    I am truly lucky. I come from a fairly craptastic family. I am close to my mom and my sister, and that's it. My dad's family is just absolute trash and I no longer speak to any of them, so I've also had the "FI is going to leave me because my family is nuts. His family will think I'm beneath them if they find out..." But they have been so wonderful! I moved 700 miles to be with FI (then boyfriend). I knew nobody. He had his entire family and friends from childhood all the way through college up here. I had never met any of his friends and family so I was super nervous. His sister & father & friends have been so amazing and welcoming to me.
    His mother passed away about 6 years before I met him, so I've never met her. When he proposed, he had 5 family rings. He and his sister, both crying, could not decide which one I would like, so his sister finally said "Just take them all and let her pick." The rings had belonged to various women in the family, including one that had been passed from their father's mother to their own mother. I called to tell his dad and his sister he had officially proposed and which ring I had chosen, and thanked them profusely for sharing such special jewelry with me and welcoming me into the family. Both of them responded that they couldn't think of a more deserving woman, and both of them cried with me. They both told me they knew his mother would have loved me, too.
    Fast forward to my mom meeting his family for the first time a couple months later. I mentioned at some point that I was going to take a piece from my mom's dress to wrap around my bouquet. FSIL said "I have our mom's dress, and I would be happy to give you a piece of that if you would like as well." It was so touching and meaningful. Everybody was crying at that.

    OMG this is so touching!  Once again, I'm crying at work haha.  What a beautiful story!  I'm sure his mom would have absolutely loved you, and it's so wonderful of them to offer you a piece of his mom's dress.  Congratulations on marrying into such a lovely family!!!
  • FIL gave us a really touching toast the night of the rehearsal dinner and ended with a quote from west side story,line of my favorite musicals. He's normally very quiet so we had no idea he would even do a toast! Both ILs are awesome and best of all his MIL is also a big Broadway showtunes nerd like me so I'll have someone to see Into the Woods with this Christmas who is actually excited about seeing it. Very easy to tell when DH is simply tolerating my movie choices. They also made a long drive to visit us this summer when I was sick and sent cards and care packages throughout the summer. It was like having two sets of parents watching out for me!
  • My ILs are fucking awesome.  From day one, they have made me feel welcome and a part of the family and I could brag on them all day.

    I know I've mentioned it before, but when H told his parents he was going to propose to me, his mom offered the diamond from her engagement ring that H's first dad gave her.  He was killed when H was a kid, and it meant the WORLD to me that this woman would pass that on to me.

    The night before the wedding, I was spending the night at the house my parents were staying in.  My mom pulled me aside after the RD, which was the first time she had gotten to spend a lot of time with his relatives.

    "His family is great."
    "I know."
    "They're good people."
    "I know."
    She paused, looked me did in the eye and said:  "Don't you fuck this up, slothie."

    Thanks mom!
    Hahaha I love that! My stepdad, after meeting my current FI, told ME not to fuck it up! He had never said that about any past relationships. And at the same time, FSIL LOVES me, constantly remarking to FI "I'm so glad you met somebody who takes your shit and gives it right back to you! You need that!"
    I find it hilarious that I define a good relationship is one in which "You can take each other's shit and give it right back."
  • I LOVE my ILs.  I also come from a BSC family.  For a year in college I actually lived with then FILs because there were major issues in my family and H and I hadn't yet saved up enough to be on our own (broke college kids).  The graciously took me and accepted me from the beginnng.  SIL is awesome.  Being the youngest I never had a younger sibling or sister so I love it!  They've always been supportive with everything. Heck, even the aunts and uncles are great!  I don't live close to any of my extended relatives so I love having them around. 
  • Can I get in on this love fest? 

    My FILs are awesome people. His dad and my dad were fast besties. They both have daughters who suck with car maintenance and that's their weird "thing." All through our dating, FFIL would come tell me before I left that he'd checked my tires, washed my windshield, and offer to fill up my gas tank. I'm not helpless, but cars just aren't my thing. 

    My FMIL has got to be the most caring and genuine person I have ever met. I mean it. I have never heard her speak an ill word about anyone or raise her voice. According to FI, neither has he. I told my momma that they would be fast friends, because they are so similar...except FMIL doesn't have a cocktail before choir practice. 

    Don't even get me started on FI's grandmother. I ADORE HER. She gives the best old lady hugs that make you feel so loved. She sends me random "little pieces of happy" in the mail with her monogrammed note cards. She is a red hat "babe" and is seriously the most badass granny I've ever met. 
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  • maeday2 said:
    Can I get in on this love fest? 

    My FILs are awesome people. His dad and my dad were fast besties. They both have daughters who suck with car maintenance and that's their weird "thing." All through our dating, FFIL would come tell me before I left that he'd checked my tires, washed my windshield, and offer to fill up my gas tank. I'm not helpless, but cars just aren't my thing. 

    My FMIL has got to be the most caring and genuine person I have ever met. I mean it. I have never heard her speak an ill word about anyone or raise her voice. According to FI, neither has he. I told my momma that they would be fast friends, because they are so similar...except FMIL doesn't have a cocktail before choir practice. 

    Don't even get me started on FI's grandmother. I ADORE HER. She gives the best old lady hugs that make you feel so loved. She sends me random "little pieces of happy" in the mail with her monogrammed note cards. She is a red hat "babe" and is seriously the most badass granny I've ever met. 
    THAT IS SO CUTE!!! <3
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