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Interfaith interracial wedding advice needed ASAP!

Knottie8950259 Knottie8950259 member
in Jewish Weddings
Hello everyone! To make a long story even longer, my fiancé and I are having an interfaith (he is Jewish I am non religious) and interracial wedding ( I am half Chinese). My parents are being extremely traditional and generous and are paying for our entire wedding. His family unfortunately can not afford to contribute much. As a result, there has been a lot of contention between my mother and I planning since my parents are paying. Here is the latest and I do not know what to do. Right now our plans are to have a non religious ceremony that incorporates the Jewish cultural aspects because we thought it would be nice. As it stands our ceremony structure is planned to be held by two large laurel branch structures. My question is now, what is the protocol for a chuppah? It is extremely important to my fiancé and my mother is being not too sensitive to the ask and has suggests if we want it we find a way to pay for it because she has already planned what our ceremony centerpiece should look like. Does anyone have advice??? At this point I have nowhere to go and I'm trying g to figure out a way to make this work where everyone is happy!!
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Re: Interfaith interracial wedding advice needed ASAP!

  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    The only rules I know of for a huppah are that it is held up by guests as an honor. Your two laurel structures might be an effective huppah in themselves.
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  • qtchic86qtchic86 member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    A chuppah is traditionally a temporary structure with 4 posts and no walls. You may have 4 guests carry the chuppah down the aisle and hold it in place, or you can get one that stays in place on the ground. Traditions are always flexible depending on what is doable for you.

    If you want 4 posts, and adding 2 more Laurel branches would be too costly, then try renting a couple of poles to put behind the branches. Try searching Google Images for "chuppah", you might find some great ideas there!

    To bring another Jewish culture element to your ceremony, at little to no additional cost, you might do a kiddush blessing. You and the groom would receive a blessing and drink wine from the kiddush cup. You can then break the glass at the end of the ceremony.

    I hope this helps!
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Before you decide to break the glass, be aware that this particular tradition has some specific religious connotations and what they are. Many Jews now, in spite of a superstition that breaking the glass ensures good luck and some Talmudic teachings that it originated in a sense of raucousness, see breaking the glass as a reminder of the destruction of the Temples and of sorrow, especially since the Holocaust. It definitely shouldn't include anyone other than the bride and groom or be done "to have a Jewish element" in an otherwise non-Jewish ceremony.
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