Too soon to re-gift?

Re: Too soon to re-gift?

• twitterbird member

  

  December 2014

  Do the two people know each other?
  

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• ChemFanatic25 member

  

  December 2014

  Not really. They know of each other but my friend lives out of state and is visiting for the weekend and the other person doesn't interact with her.

  

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• Liatris2010 mod

  

  December 2014

  I think it is fine. The gift is yours to do with as you see fit. Better to find it a loving home than let it waste away gathering dust.

  

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• allispain member

  

  December 2014

  I think you're safe to regift, since they don't actually interact with each other.

  
  

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• vikinganna87 member

  

  December 2014

  Go for it!

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• Maggie0829 member

  

  December 2014

  What confuses me is why this person gave you that gift in the first place.  If you told them the truth then why even waste your money on something that you know the receiver will never use?

  
  

  But I agree with the others.  Re-gift away.  No sense you holding onto it knowing that you will never use it.

  
  

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• ChemFanatic25 member

  

  December 2014

  Maggie0829 said:

  What confuses me is why this person gave you that gift in the first place.  If you told them the truth then why even waste your money on something that you know the receiver will never use?

  
  

  But I agree with the others.  Re-gift away.  No sense you holding onto it knowing that you will never use it.

  I honestly have no idea why they even asked. I have been thinking about it more and more and it kind of bothers me. Like why ask my opinion if you're not going to listen, especially if it has something to do with me. Plus this person knows I don't really care for the gift they got me and I've made that clear multiple times, this isn't the first. But I should stop. I do greatly appreciate that the person thought of me so I won't let it bother me.

  
  

  I think it was a "blanket" gift. Because I know that they got similar gifts for several other people so they may have decided why not buy multiples.

  

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• Liatris2010 mod

  

  December 2014

  Maggie0829 said:

  What confuses me is why this person gave you that gift in the first place.  If you told them the truth then why even waste your money on something that you know the receiver will never use?

  
  

  But I agree with the others.  Re-gift away.  No sense you holding onto it knowing that you will never use it.

  My guess was that they were re-gifting it.

   

  I have no problem with re-gifting if it is going to a loving home. I do have a problem with re-gifting stuff just to avoid buying a gift. Better to give nothing than to give garbage.
  

  

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• thelastdreamer member

  

  December 2014

  I think it's fine as long as they aren't friends on social media. It could be awkward if the person you give the gift to Instagram's "Look what ChemFanatic25 gave me! Love it!" or something. 

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• short+sassy member

  

  December 2014

  Maggie0829 said:

  What confuses me is why this person gave you that gift in the first place.  If you told them the truth then why even waste your money on something that you know the receiver will never use?

  
  

  But I agree with the others.  Re-gift away.  No sense you holding onto it knowing that you will never use it.

  I have had both a b/f (ex now) and a friend do that to me.  It is a bit upsetting and disconcerting.  And just doesn't make a lot of sense.  And in both cases I KNOW they did not have the gift ahead of time when they asked.

  Normally I'm very gracious when receiving a gift, even if it is not something I care for, but in both of those cases I will admit to not at all being gracious and I am not apologizing for that.

  So here are the juicy details.  Probably TMI, lol.  My friend was raised in a very strict, right wing household.  Months before Christmas, at her prompting, we had an (ahem) discussion about sex toys.  I think she was trying to break out of her shell.  She asked me about a particular type.  I encouraged her to try it out, but mentioned I personally don't like them at all.  Lo and behold, that was what she got me for Christmas.  I think it was one of those, she really wanted to get it for herself but wasn't brave enough to do it.

  To me, outside of a bachelorette party, this is a wildly inappropriate gift to get for even a close friend and I was pretty horrified by it.  On top of that, I happened to be living at my mom's house for a few months between graduating from college and moving out of state.  I did give her a stilted thank-you and then even tried to refuse the gift with the excuse that I would be mortified if my mom found it (true) and encouraged her to keep it for herself.  Of course, she insisted I keep the present (sigh) and I did not want to make her feel worse.  I ended up wrapping the box in a blanket and throwing it way to the back of my car trunk.  I discovered it again when I was selling said car about one year later and was cleaning out the trunk, lol.

  The ex unwanted gift is a much less juicy.  He asked me what I wanted for Christmas.  I told him I really needed a CD rack, but wanted something cool and fun.  Maybe art-deco-y looking.  I even specifically told him...if you do get me a CD rack, just please don't get me one of those plain looking, cheap, black plastic ones.  So what did he get me?  Yup, a plain, cheap, black plastic one.  He got a stilted thank-you and confused look.

  Looking back, I probably should have said something to him.  Things were not well in our relationship and we broke up about 5 months later.  I still wonder to this day if he was trying to tell me something by giving me a gift that I had specifically told him I did not want.  Yes, I know it shouldn't matter, but that $10 piece of crap was the ONLY gift he got me that year.  For those 5 months, I did end up using the CD rack, which was a mistake.  Every time I noticed it, it was almost like a symbol and a reminder of why/when did this great guy I loved turn into such an inconsiderate jerk.

  Perhaps I am being a bit unfair.  The dumb CD rack actually did give me a lot of pleasure.  A few days after we broke up, I took it out to my apartment's parking lot near the dumpster and JUMPED on it over and over again until it was in a hundred tiny pieces.  Laughing maniacally the whole time .  It was a seriously cathartic moment that helped me move on. 
  

  

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• Fran1985 member

  

  December 2014

  I regifted a brand new kitchen aid mixer this year. I feel like that's a pretty good regift.

  
  
  

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• indianaalum member

  

  December 2014 edited December 2014

  personally, I think re-gifting is tacky. If you know someone who will use it, be honest and say "I received this as a gift but I won't use i, here have it"

  
  

  But passing off gifts you receive as something thoughtful you bought yourself for someone else is tacky as hell, IMO

  
  

  Althjough a kitchenaid mixer is super nice gift, they are expensive so you just mislead someone into thinking you spent several hundred dollars on them when you spend zero. The person could end up feeling bad you spend so much on them if they didn't do the same. TO ME, that is tacky as hell.

  
  

  IF you don't like a gift, feel free to give it to a home that will appreciate it, just don't mislead people

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• Maggie0829 member

  

  December 2014

  Fran1985 said:

  I regifted a brand new kitchen aid mixer this year. I feel like that's a pretty good regift.

  I would have loved that regift!

  
  

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• JellyBean52513 member

  

  December 2014

  If it makes you feel better, one of my clients gave me a Christmas card at work yesterday and it had a little cash in it (not much at all, but still totally appreciated that she thought of me!) I used it to buy one of those big gigantic tins of kettle corn to bring to my SO's sister's house on Christmas Eve for all the kids to snack on. That's kind of a re-gift lol

  
  

  Also, I feel your pain. Last year for my birthday my SO... god bless him.... bought me a Pandora charm for the bracelet my boss had given me as a thank you for working a million hours while she was away on a cruise. Now, I'm not a fan of the whole charm bracelet thing. I think those things are so overpriced, and I really don't wear jewelry. My SO knows this and he knows how stupid I think those things are. What does he do? Calls me FROM THE STORE to make sure my bracelet fits their charms (the bracelet itself was some other brand) and I was like dude, kindly leave and don't waste your money. It ended up being a "Happy Anniversary" charm because my birthday was our year-and-a-half anniversary (yes, we still celebrate every month and even have champagne every time lol yesterday was 29 months!) and the gesture was actually very cute. But the bracelet is sitting in my jewelry case, collecting dust to this day. I don't understand why people do stuff like that.

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  December 2014

  indianaalum said:

  personally, I think re-gifting is tacky. If you know someone who will use it, be honest and say "I received this as a gift but I won't use i, here have it"

  
  

  But passing off gifts you receive as something thoughtful you bought yourself for someone else is tacky as hell, IMO

  
  

  Althjough a kitchenaid mixer is super nice gift, they are expensive so you just mislead someone into thinking you spent several hundred dollars on them when you spend zero. The person could end up feeling bad you spend so much on them if they didn't do the same. TO ME, that is tacky as hell.

  
  

  IF you don't like a gift, feel free to give it to a home that will appreciate it, just don't mislead people

  I'm going to kindly disagree.  For example, the kitchenaid mixer thing.  She didn't spend NOTHING on gifting it to her friend, she spent the cost of returning and getting cash back for a kitchenaid mixer.  It's the same way with anything.  

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