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Anything but a bridal shower......

ambiguousbrideambiguousbride member
5 Love Its First Comment
in Pre-wedding Parties
I will have lived with my fiance for 10 years by our wedding. We bought a house in 2012, we have everything we need. I do NOT want to have a shower but my FMIL really wants us/me to have one. I told her my opinion on the whole thing, which she does not quite see eye to eye on. I get the impression that she just wants to extend time with her family (they live all over the country) and I understand that completely.
All of her family will be coming in a few days before the wedding, what are some low stress shower alternatives we could do?

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Re: Anything but a bridal shower......

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    CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited December 2014
    You do not need alternatives to a bridal shower.  Just politely decline if you do not want one.  "Thank you so much for your kind motives, but I really do not want a shower."  No explanations necessary.
    It is not your responsibility to entertain your future in-laws before the wedding.  When we visit relatives, my DH goes to work on yard projects and I prefer to go shopping!
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    Lauderdale PinkLauderdale Pink member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer
    A shower a few days before the wedding seems very stressful to me.  If I am the guest, I feel like I am being asked to bring two gifts at once, which I would have to do anyway, but this seems forced.  FMIL can host a brunch the day after the wedding or she can host several smaller "meet and greets" on the evenings when her relatives arrive in town.  I understand her point, though.  If I had to wait 10 years for my son's wedding, I would squeeze every bit of party I could get out of it.  She must be very happy, proud, and excited to show you off.
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    climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I didn't have a shower. My MIL really wanted to throw me one and kept asking. I politely declined each time. She eventfully stopped asking.
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    AddieCakeAddieCake member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    You could just have a lunch, but I agree anything a few days before would stress me out. A bunch of us went to lunch the day before my wedding just as lunch, not even as any kind of party or anything, and it took up way more time than I had to spare on that day and contributed to my being up past midnight that night and needing to be up at 6 the next morning.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    charcoalandblushcharcoalandblush member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer
    A friend who really doesn't want a shower is having a brunch the day after the wedding instead. Same opportunity to spend more time with friends and family, without the pressure of gifts or elaborate planning.

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