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NWR: Feeling awkward about this sort-of invitation?

thelastdreamerthelastdreamer member
500 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer First Anniversary
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Hey ladies, just wondering what your thoughts were on a kind of awkward situation I'm dealing with. My DH and I do not live near any family and decided not to travel for Christmas this year as we took all our vacation for our honeymoon. We were fine with this and thought a cozy first Christmas in town would be sweet. A church friend of mine heard we were staying in town and verbally invited us to have Christmas dinner with her and her family. I thought this was so kind of her! I offered to help with the cooking and she said she'd let me know closer what I could do (this was back in early November). This friend is pregnant and is due next week. When she first invited us, we joked that it may end up being Christmas dinner in the hospital if she had her baby a little early. 

However, now that it's close to Christmas, things are a little weird and I'm just wondering if we're still invited. She mentioned us coming over repeatedly up until a few weeks ago. She said she wasn't sure if they'd have dinner on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day and she would let me know. About a week ago I sent her a text casually asking if she'd thought anymore about which day they'd be having dinner on. I never heard back from her. We've texted about other things frequently but she isn't responding to texts about the Christmas dinner. I know she thinks she may go into labor this week, so I figured she just didn't want to set plans in stone in case she does - which is COMPLETELY legit. I know that having a baby is of course WAY more important than us coming over Christmas dinner. 

I just feel kind of awkward about it now. I still have no idea if this is happening Christmas Eve or Christmas Day or if it's happening at all. Should I just let it go? I texted one more time and said "Hey! I know you could be going into labor any second so everything is probably in the air, but just let me know if you still decide to have Christmas dinner and need me to help with cooking!" I've heard no response to that sent several days ago. I know she hasn't gone into labor yet or anything because I got an email from her about something else today. I just feel awkward because obviously if we aren't going, I want to go ahead and buy things for a dinner of our own and began preparing. If we are going, I want to figure out what dishes I need to make in the next day or two. 

Would you just leave it alone and assume the dinner is called off until you heard something? I definitely want to be respectful of her situation. 
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Re: NWR: Feeling awkward about this sort-of invitation?

  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I would let it go and assume the plans have changed. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • lovegood90lovegood90 member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    I'd just leave it alone at this point. It sounds like you've reached out enough already. I'd just start planning my own thing.

    Formerly martha1818

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  • jacques27jacques27 member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Plan your own thing.  If their dinner still goes on as planned and you still feel like going, your meal will keep.  You can make it the next day for the weekend or I'm sure you can freeze it and make it for New Years if you don't already have plans for that, either.

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  • indianaalumindianaalum member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited December 2014
    As a person who just had a baby, I can tell you she probably was being an overachiever when she invited you. She probably had no idea how crabby and tired she'd feel that close to her due date. So...my guess is, she had decided not to cook (or to keep it low key) and doesn't know how to tell you. I had no idea how extremely tired and exhausted I would be that close to my due date until it actually got there.

    I would make alternate plans. If she ends up wanting you to come over, you can always still go then

    Another possible idea, is to offer to cook the dinner for HER at your place (assuming her plans weren't including her entire family of 30 or anything0 LOL). She might welcome the option.
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  • lc07lc07 member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I think your whole "Just let me know.." thing sounded very casual and play-by-ear which is why you may not have heard back from her. It wasn't a "could you please let me know if we are still on?" which to me, sounds more like you need an answer.
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