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have I spoiled things?

futuremrslavenderfuturemrslavender member
First Anniversary First Comment
in Not Engaged Yet
my boyfriend and I have been together going on 4 years now, when I was away for work he told me he was shopping for a ring. I got really excited because we've been talking about it for so long. He told me it would be from now (back in August) anywhere to 11:59 on December 31st. Well still no ring but as the days are passing by and we get closer to January 1st I'm getting excited but also am worried that maybe I know too much... I've always known we were going to get married. I just feel like I'm now waiting for it to happen, I know he's really excited though. 
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Re: have I spoiled things?

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    ceduleyceduley member
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    oh my, i know exactly how you feel. I know its hard, but it's really hard for him trying to think of how he will propose in such a memorable way. When my fiance's best man was getting engaged, his now wife was one of those who expected it at ever turn. Every nice dinner they went to, and every which way. eventually he had to take off work early and just sit inside the front door to wait for her when she got home. He dressed up and got her flowers and was on one knee when she walked in. He told her he tried so many times at the nicer restaurants, but this was the only way he could surprise her. Just don't think about it and let it happen, whenever it does its going to be perfect. Especially with the holidays, there are so many other things to think about, trust he'll make it worth the wait. 
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    phiraphira member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    futuremrslavender said:
    my boyfriend and I have been together going on 4 years now, when I was away for work he told me he was shopping for a ring. I got really excited because we've been talking about it for so long. He told me it would be from now (back in August) anywhere to 11:59 on December 31st. Well still no ring but as the days are passing by and we get closer to January 1st I'm getting excited but also am worried that maybe I know too much... I've always known we were going to get married. I just feel like I'm now waiting for it to happen, I know he's really excited though. 
    Getting engaged is really exciting, and there's really no wrong way to have it happen. Knowing when it's going to happen doesn't ruin anything. My husband never proposed to me (nor did I propose to him); together, we decided to get engaged after living together for a year, and on that day, we put on engagement rings and celebrated.

    Just relax!
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    bethsmilesbethsmiles member
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    Getting engaged should be exciting no matter how much you know. The media makes us think that the only way to have a great proposal is if it is some over-the-top, complete surprise proposal. But that's just the way things are for most couples these days. I mean everyone (IMO) should really have some idea a proposal is coming. Getting married is a decision you make together as a couple, not something one person springs on the other person.


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    Blue & WhiteBlue & White member
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    @bethsmiles is wise. Plus, you don't know everything. You know a potential timeline, which may or may not happen. You don't know how or where or what he will say. So I wouldn't freak out :)

    Plus my proposal was such a surprise (after 6 years of dating so it's not like I didn't know it was coming SOMEDAY) that I said "maybe" lol. To each his own.
    I guess, to tell you the truth, I've never had much of a desire to grow facial hair. I think I've managed to play quarterback just fine without a mustache. - Peyton
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    lavenderfields13lavenderfields13 member
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    ditto PPs. It's STILL going to be ridiculously exciting when he asks! Believe me.

    Now try not to watch his every move for the next few days trying to pinpoint the exact time!
     




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    Dignity100Dignity100 member
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    Let's say you get engaged and you're not surprised... does that make it any LESS special?  Even though it's hard, try not to anticipate it, even try to get in the mindset of  'maybe plans have changed' and he's going to wait... because maybe he will wait now since he knows you're expecting it.


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    cu97tigercu97tiger member
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    Through a series of random events, I had pinpointed the day I thought DH was going to propose. He still surprised me (TWICE) and it was one of the best days of my life. So no, you haven't ruined anything. But maybe stop thinking about it so much and just enjoy the holidays with your BF!
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    "You are made of win." -SopChick
    Still here and still fabulous!

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    mcmahontobe121mcmahontobe121 member
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    you havent spoiled anything.  it is still really exciting as you never know when it is going to happen! I know my boyfriend has the ring and is going to propose for christmas...i just dont know when! 2 sleeps to go for me so very exciting not knowing when exactly it might be
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