Apologies in advance for the long rant; I am just very stressed and don't feel like I can discuss this with FI or anyone else in my life right now.
So I'll admit that after the initial months of excitement wedding planning got exhausting and stressful pretty quickly. Intense pressure from both sides of the family as well as financial pressures caused a lot of fighting in the early months of planning between FI and I. We've gotten past that now, but it has not made him eager to jump back into planning. The last few months have also just been awful at work as I've been doing two jobs while we try to replace a coworker -- so, long story short, we lost our momentum. Attempts to work with a grocery store florist in November fell through and so we got to a point where we just threw up our hands and accepted that we'd have to finish up after the holidays. The major pieces left to finish are: cake, flowers, groomsmen/groom attire, registry, and transportation. We are getting married in July, and I have a feeling that was pushing it for cake and flowers, but I figured we'd be fine if we knocked things out in January.
But then, FI got in a bad accident over the holidays and completely totaled his car. We are extremely, extremely lucky in that by some miracle neither he nor anyone else was hurt, and the only vehicle seriously damaged was his -- so I don't want to give the impression in the slightest that I am anything but grateful for that, or aware that it could have been much worse. However, in addition to presenting financial problems (his car is old and the insurance payout will not likely cover the cost of a replacement, even used) this has created a new logistical issue for us. We have had to do almost all wedding business on weekends because we are getting married in the city I live in and he lives about 2 hours away (ends up being a lot longer than that on weeknights). Until he gets a new car, we will need to spend weekends at his place, which makes meeting with vendors in my area difficult. Between that and the fact that he now has to work several weekends in January and February, I am concerned we won't be able to do anything until late February, which the planning timelines all seem to suggest is just not fast enough for things like cake and flowers. So now I'm starting to freak out a little.
Over the holidays I gave up on my plan for the bouquets and am ordering some inexpensive silk flowers, so I think all we'll need is corsages and boutonnieres, but I don't know how early we'd need to order those from a 'real' florist since the grocery stores just aren't panning out. And I'm completely lost on timeline for cake. We won't be able to afford anything fancy, but it will need to be at from a place that delivers (I'd be fine with a Stop & Shop cake, but there's no one who could help me pick it up and I'll probably have to spend most of the day before the wedding entertaining out-of-town relatives) and I don't know how long to expect on that either.
Am I overreacting? Is there any chance that I'd still be able to get this done? I just feel completely lost. and I can't possibly mention any of this to FI for weeks, because he's (understandably) still really upset by the accident and (reasonably) more worried about his transportation than a silly party. I know it's not a big deal in the big scheme of things, but we're asking relatives to pay a lot of money to come out for this (as my parents' remind me daily) so I still feel a lot of pressure to do this right and meet expectations (especially since cake and what we have left to get for flowers are really for our guests, not for us).