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FI driving me up a wall!

lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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I know I'm not the only one in this boat so I hope to hear some awesome vents!

We live in different states for about 7 months out of the year, so when he is home he thinks it's "go time" on everything we want to get done around here. He popped the question in December and has since some up with a list that made me want to slap him.. First thing after the new year I get an email with an estimate and schedule to remodel the master bath, bathroom upstairs, and the basement (he's a construction manager/estimating engineer so this happens with every project). Once he has a fire under his ass it's "go time" so master cabinets are already torn apart and have been my every night after work project this week. THEN he comes home and wants to chat about an auction he went to.. it was "so cool" and we could "make so much money" blah blah blah, great sweetie, your point? So he proceeds to ask "how much money do you want to put into this? There are three houses going to auction January 22 that I want to go for" Um.. what!? So in short.. this is what I'm facing for the next year:

1. Bought a new camp trailer (no, we haven't sold our other one)
2. Remodel two bathrooms and a basement
3. Buy and flip at least one house at auction (yeah, he's thinking more than one)
4. Replace roof on our rental house by fall
5. Oh yeah.. plan a wedding

I will either be bald or emaciated by the end of this year! Anyone else have a very sweet, motivated FI that manages to pile on so much shit they just want to sleep for the next year!?

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Re: FI driving me up a wall!

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    mrsk616mrsk616 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited January 2015
    my fi keeps coming up with random things that need to be done by tomorrow. seriously where did this come from when we just needed the carpet and the basement cleaned out to move in. argh now its wire lights he decided to put in, dust tonight and vacuum up all the over flow of insulation. paint this or that. i am beyond done with this house and wish he would stop with this everything needs to be redone. 

    eta: i keep asking him if it hinders us from moving, if he says no i tell him it can wait. 
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    theycallmelinztheycallmelinz member
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    edited January 2015
    My FI has decided he wants to move to Colorado and open a pot store. And I'm a "dream crusher" for telling him no. 

    He's not nearly as motivated as your FI, but I feel your pain. 
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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    mrsk616 said:
    my fi keeps coming up with random things that need to be done by tomorrow. seriously where did this come from when we just needed the carpet and the basement cleaned out to move in. argh now its wire lights he decided to put in, dust tonight and vacuum up all the over flow of insulation. paint this or that. i am beyond done with this house and wish he would stop with this everything needs to be redone. 
    oh good, it's not just me! Sorry to hear that, I always joked that with house #1 all the projects nearly got us to a "pre marital divorce"! 

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    theycallmelinztheycallmelinz member
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    lovemesomemonster said:
    mrsk616 said:
    my fi keeps coming up with random things that need to be done by tomorrow. seriously where did this come from when we just needed the carpet and the basement cleaned out to move in. argh now its wire lights he decided to put in, dust tonight and vacuum up all the over flow of insulation. paint this or that. i am beyond done with this house and wish he would stop with this everything needs to be redone. 
    oh good, it's not just me! Sorry to hear that, I always joked that with house #1 all the projects nearly got us to a "pre marital divorce"! 
    They do say if you can survive building a house together, your marriage can survive anything lol
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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    @theycallmelinz: This is the greatest thing I could have hoped to hear in response to this post! Thank you for making me laugh out loud while avoiding work!

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    classicalandedgyclassicalandedgy member
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    theycallmelinz said:
    My FI has decided he wants to move to Colorado and open a pot store. And I'm a "dream crusher" for telling him no. 

    He's not nearly as motivated as your FI, but I feel your pain. 

    Awe come on you guys could next Pot Barrons of Colorado...  I watched that show once and nearly died at how much cash comes in.  I heard that Colorado made something like 14 million in taxes alone on just pot. 

    My ex-husband wanted to open a rim rental place...  That dream was crushed very quickly too, lol. 

    image

     

     

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    amelishaamelisha member
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    Mine gets like that too, but fortunately he's got a memory like a goldfish and if I don't mention it again, he'll forget all about it for a few weeks, bring it up one more time, and forget about it forever. So the only way anything happens in his life is if I keep mentioning it...which is very convenient for stuff that I don't want to do at the moment, lol.

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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    classicalandedgy said:
    theycallmelinz said:
    My FI has decided he wants to move to Colorado and open a pot store. And I'm a "dream crusher" for telling him no. 

    He's not nearly as motivated as your FI, but I feel your pain. 

    Awe come on you guys could next Pot Barrons of Colorado...  I watched that show once and nearly died at how much cash comes in.  I heard that Colorado made something like 14 million in taxes alone on just pot. 

    My ex-husband wanted to open a rim rental place...  That dream was crushed very quickly too, lol. 

    "Pot Barrons" sounds so much more fun that "Queen of the Storage Rental" (yep, another in the future investment) 

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    theycallmelinztheycallmelinz member
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    classicalandedgy said:
    theycallmelinz said:
    My FI has decided he wants to move to Colorado and open a pot store. And I'm a "dream crusher" for telling him no. 

    He's not nearly as motivated as your FI, but I feel your pain. 

    Awe come on you guys could next Pot Barrons of Colorado...  I watched that show once and nearly died at how much cash comes in.  I heard that Colorado made something like 14 million in taxes alone on just pot. 

    My ex-husband wanted to open a rim rental place...  That dream was crushed very quickly too, lol. 

    This is where he got the idea. I tried to explain that the people on that show were pretty well off financially before they opened their stores, and you need money to make money. He's now decided that we are moving back to Georgia (which has always been the plan because he's from there) and he is going to "jump on the market as soon as it's legalized"
    *facepalm*
    Anniversary



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    NowIAmSypNowIAmSyp member
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    OMG, my fiance can not just SIT down, lol.  Sounds similar to the above.  He always has to be doing something- fixing something, running to Home Depot to buy things to fix things (at 10pm at night!), working on his truck, etc., etc.  Granted, I love that he's handy, but seriously sometimes?  Just SIT down :)

    I seriously considered buying him the children's book "Go the Fuck to Sleep" for Christmas 

    image

    :)
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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    soontobesyp said:
    OMG, my fiance can not just SIT down, lol.  Sounds similar to the above.  He always has to be doing something- fixing something, running to Home Depot to buy things to fix things (at 10pm at night!), working on his truck, etc., etc.  Granted, I love that he's handy, but seriously sometimes?  Just SIT down :)

    I seriously considered buying him the children's book "Go the Fuck to Sleep" for Christmas 

    image

    :)
    THAT IS SUCH A GOOD IDEA! I am totally going to steal this and do it! I'm with you all the way, love that he's handy but it would be nice if he could sit the f down every once in a while! The only way to get him to do that is to watch either Orange is the New Black or House of Cards.. sadly I am officially out of episodes!!!

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    climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
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    I feel your pain. Our master bath has been under construction for as long as I can remember. I have tile just sitting downstairs. It's making me insane. Supposedly work is starting this weekend *fingers crossed*
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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    ClimbingBrideNY said:
    I feel your pain. Our master bath has been under construction for as long as I can remember. I have tile just sitting downstairs. It's making me insane. Supposedly work is starting this weekend *fingers crossed*
    Good luck with that! We did tile in our last house (and a claw foot tub that I was told I would never get again) and while FI is super motivated and it didn't take long that was one project I stayed out of! 

    While i'm on a freaking rant.. I work from home and there is a 7 foot pile of snow in the middle of the cul de sac.. apparently they are removing it today and it's "beep beep beep.. vroom.. beep beep beep" Going to flip!

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    penguin44penguin44 member
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    theycallmelinz said:
    classicalandedgy said:
    theycallmelinz said:
    My FI has decided he wants to move to Colorado and open a pot store. And I'm a "dream crusher" for telling him no. 

    He's not nearly as motivated as your FI, but I feel your pain. 

    Awe come on you guys could next Pot Barrons of Colorado...  I watched that show once and nearly died at how much cash comes in.  I heard that Colorado made something like 14 million in taxes alone on just pot. 

    My ex-husband wanted to open a rim rental place...  That dream was crushed very quickly too, lol. 

    This is where he got the idea. I tried to explain that the people on that show were pretty well off financially before they opened their stores, and you need money to make money. He's now decided that we are moving back to Georgia (which has always been the plan because he's from there) and he is going to "jump on the market as soon as it's legalized"
    *facepalm*

    My mom announced to the family over the holidays that she wants to open up a fruit bouquet place and call it "Incredible Edibles." So of course everyone burst out laughing. She honestly didn't understand why that was funny. We asked her if she planned on moving to Colorado soon because it would be a hit there.

    OP, I may be similar to your husband... I have a lot of future projects planned for our house. I'm constantly buying furniture to remodel and thinking of new projects. I should let my husband know that it could be worse. I could be looking at buying houses to remodel!

    Anniversary

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    beetherybeethery member
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    theycallmelinz said:
    classicalandedgy said:
    theycallmelinz said:
    My FI has decided he wants to move to Colorado and open a pot store. And I'm a "dream crusher" for telling him no. 

    He's not nearly as motivated as your FI, but I feel your pain. 

    Awe come on you guys could next Pot Barrons of Colorado...  I watched that show once and nearly died at how much cash comes in.  I heard that Colorado made something like 14 million in taxes alone on just pot. 

    My ex-husband wanted to open a rim rental place...  That dream was crushed very quickly too, lol. 

    This is where he got the idea. I tried to explain that the people on that show were pretty well off financially before they opened their stores, and you need money to make money. He's now decided that we are moving back to Georgia (which has always been the plan because he's from there) and he is going to "jump on the market as soon as it's legalized"
    *facepalm*
    lmfao he's going to be waiting a while.
    --

    I'm the fuck     out.

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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    @penguin44: YES! show him this and let him know it could be worse! In my mind TWO houses to deal with is enough! I see his logic and get that it might be a great investment but we are 26/27, can't we have a year of peace!!! We can pick up doing this right AFTER the wedding.. I guess it's also compounded with the fact that I spend 3.5 months over seas working last year so down time sounds REALLY great right now!

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    wrigleyvillewrigleyville member
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    I'm sorry you're going through this, but I have to admit I'm a lot like your fiance. H has come home to find I've painted an entire room and/or rearranged the furniture.

    Luckily, he doesn't mind what I do with the apartment, as long as I don't touch his office. He finds it amusing, if not a bit confusing, but he understands that I need that outlet.

    I get a fire under my ass at the most random times. I reorganized our kitchen cabinets at 10:00 last night. He walked in, looked around, and didn't even bat an eye.
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    mrsk616mrsk616 member
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    theycallmelinz said:
    lovemesomemonster said:
    mrsk616 said:
    my fi keeps coming up with random things that need to be done by tomorrow. seriously where did this come from when we just needed the carpet and the basement cleaned out to move in. argh now its wire lights he decided to put in, dust tonight and vacuum up all the over flow of insulation. paint this or that. i am beyond done with this house and wish he would stop with this everything needs to be redone. 
    oh good, it's not just me! Sorry to hear that, I always joked that with house #1 all the projects nearly got us to a "pre marital divorce"! 
    They do say if you can survive building a house together, your marriage can survive anything lol
    add to that 5 project cars, a basement that needs fixing because it constantly floods (5 times last year alone and it was a pretty dry year) and a hot water tank installed laundry room patched basement cleaned. oh its a long list.
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    Cookie PusherCookie Pusher member
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    My DH doesn't bother with big, grand planning. He just wants to buy a house RIGHTNOW with money we don't have. No biggie.
    ~*~*~*~*~

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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    Cookie Pusher said:
    My DH doesn't bother with big, grand planning. He just wants to buy a house RIGHTNOW with money we don't have. No biggie.
    Oh that's a fun one, good luck with the conversation I'm sure you are having! Mine is so tight with money unless it's an "investment" that he had a heart attack over a wedding budget.. and yet.. "let's go buy a house at auction, oh yeah, and I bought an $18,000 camp trailer" 

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    Cookie PusherCookie Pusher member
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    lovemesomemonster said:
    Cookie Pusher said:
    My DH doesn't bother with big, grand planning. He just wants to buy a house RIGHTNOW with money we don't have. No biggie.
    Oh that's a fun one, good luck with the conversation I'm sure you are having! Mine is so tight with money unless it's an "investment" that he had a heart attack over a wedding budget.. and yet.. "let's go buy a house at auction, oh yeah, and I bought an $18,000 camp trailer" 
    My husband is terrible with money. Absolutely horrible. It burns a hole in his pocket, and he likes to spend it faster than he can make it. I, on the other hand, have a clear idea of how much I've spent every month (I can tell you within +/-$50 what my credit card statement is and I rarely use cash) even though I shop frequently - I'm just a bargain queen. So yea, DH has been talking about buying a house for at least 5 years but had never actually saved a dime. Then he wanted to get married, so all the money I had set aside for either a new car (which I need) or a house all got spent paying for the wedding. Now, 6 months later, he wants to break our lease (which would cost us a small fortune) and buy a house. With money I no longer have. I think the closest we're getting to a house, ladies, is moving into my mother's basement...........
    ~*~*~*~*~

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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    @cookie pusher maybe moving into your mother's basement will light a fire under his ass to learn how to save!

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    Cookie PusherCookie Pusher member
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    lovemesomemonster said:
    @cookie pusher maybe moving into your mother's basement will light a fire under his ass to learn how to save!
    Maybe, but it will probably drive me to murder....
    ~*~*~*~*~

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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    Cookie Pusher said:
    lovemesomemonster said:
    @cookie pusher maybe moving into your mother's basement will light a fire under his ass to learn how to save!
    Maybe, but it will probably drive me to murder....
    I understand this one well.. got started on the cabinets in the bathroom Tuesday after work.. yesterday after work he comes in and just says "geez, this is going to take a whole week".. yeah babe, I work full time, sorry I can't refinish cabinets in two hours!!!

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    tcnobletcnoble member
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    edited January 2015
    We just moved in to our first home (a rental) at the end of November. It was quite a stressful ordeal, just dealing with finding a place, the finances, etc. especially around the holidays. I am SO happy where we are and glad we got settled before the wedding.

    Wedding is in just over 2 months. YAY.

    Now he's looking for foreclosed homes that we can buy and totally renovate within the year that our lease is up. Hi, can't we just enjoy being in this house for a few months before we have to move on to the next place?

    I guess I have tunnel vision and just want to focus on the wedding and honeymoon and after that on to the next big thing.

    Which is a puppy!

    And then maybe we can talk about our next house. Agh.

    ETA my Fi is also of the "handy" variety - I think it's just a trait for them. There's always something they want to fix or work on or tear apart or rebuild. Bless them, but like you said, SIT DOWN.
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    jdluvr06jdluvr06 member
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    Dh has started all these projects since we moved into this house that he has had no motivation to finish even though at the time they were things that had to be "done right this very second". Since I found out I'm pregnant it's lit a fire under his ass though. About half the projects he started that he would "get around to finishing" are finished.
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    lovemesomemonsterlovemesomemonster member
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    Here is mid progress on the cabinets.. please excuse the mess and the flooring is terrible, I know, new shit is ordered.. Now if you'll excuse me I must go finish the glaze if I'm going to get that top coat on tonight!! GAH!


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