Receiving Line - Bride and Groom Accept the Gifts?

littlelottehenry · January 2015

Just a question about etiquette. So instead of a large receiving line my FI and I are thinking of having the line right at the entrance of the reception, but instead of gift bearers just having us accept the gifts with the table right behind us and probably some assistants. Does this seem too grabby? We were thinking it might be nice to accept the gifts and say a thank you right from the get go - that being said, I don't want to make anyone feel self conscious if they didn't bring a gift because we absolutely don't expect it!

WhatawagSBNy · January 2015

Standing by the gifts at the door looks like taking admission. That will be one gift, and the gentleman over there will show you to your seat.
Silliness aside, it makes people who are planning to send gifts when you return from your honeymoon feel like they should have brought it. And most people actually prefer that guests not do so. Those people who were trying to be considerate end up feeling bad.

Stay away from the gift area, and do not mention gifts at this time, since you are not opening them anyway.

beachyone15 · January 2015

littlelottehenry said:

We're going to have a large wedding, and it's an "informal" line because it's just FI and I with no one else, but I don't want to miss people.

Then I don't see anything wrong with greeting each guest as they enter the reception (although you may still miss a few people). However I would not take gifts from them. Say your hellos and let them enter the reception and find the gift table from there.

lovegood90 · January 2015

It sounds too gift grabby to me, and would make anyone who didn't bring a gift uncomfortable.

Side-note: Even if you did do it this way and said thank you verbally, I think you'd still need to send a thank-you note afterwards.

littlelottehenry · January 2015

lovegood90 said:
Side-note: Even if you did do it this way and said thank you verbally, I think you'd still need to send a thank-you note afterwards.

Oh of course! We're absolutely going to send thank-you notes, it would be so rude if we didn't! Thank you for your input.

photokitty · January 2015

What on earth are gift bearers? Do people honestly assign the job of placing the gift on the gift table to someone? That's worse than being "honored" by standing next tot he guest book.

I would stand inside the reception out of the way of the guestbook, escort card table, gift table etc. Let people get in the door and then greet them.

littlelottehenry · January 2015

Typically gift bearers are kid cousins, typically the boys, that want to help out. Maybe it's just a tradition in my area but the kids LOVE it.

beachyone15 · January 2015

I think I'm confused by this one. Why do you need a formal line? Couldn't you leave an open gift table for people to place gifts on and then do table visits or mingle with your guests during the reception?

mikenberger · January 2015

Interesting. Never heard of that before.

Yeah, I'd probably save the gift receiving for a table

littlelottehenry · January 2015

We're going to have a large wedding, and it's an "informal" line because it's just FI and I with no one else, but I don't want to miss people.

Jen4948 · January 2015

I've never heard of "gift bearers" at weddings, but that's because etiquette generally recommends that gifts be sent to the couple before or after the wedding and not brought to it.

Should people bring gifts, I'd designate a place where they can leave the gifts and arrange for a venue staff person to protect them. Note: This is not something to be delegated to a bridal party or family member as an "honor."

levioosa · January 2015

It honestly seems gift grabby to me, and I would feel uncomfortable even if I had sent a gift (which would have been shipped to you before hand).

Viczaesar · January 2015

Don't link your receiving line with presents.

Receiving Line - Bride and Groom Accept the Gifts?

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