Bridal Party Help

Re: Bridal Party Help

• flantastic member

  

  February 2015

  jkingley2015 said:

  I am not sure what to do here. My sister was supposed to be my maid of honor, and she lives 1,200 miles away. She is pregnant and the baby is due 20 days before our wedding. She says she might not be able to make the drive now because of the baby. We are supposed to be having 4 bridesmaids and 4 groomsmen, but now that my sister might be backing out, should I ask my sister if she wants to back out of the wedding party and just attend the wedding if she can? If she says yes to that should I try and find another person to add to the bridal party to make it 4 bridesmaids again? or should I leave it uneven. Our wedding is in June so its only 4 and a half months to go. I just don't know what to do. HELP!

  Even sides affect exactly nothing. It' a bummer your sister may not be able to make it, but if she can't, you don't need to make her feel replaceable. She will back out on her own if she needs to, and you definitely shouldn't ask her to do so.
  

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• levioosa member

  

  February 2015

  Sides do not have to be even.  Don't "give her an out."  This is hurtful and will be perceived as such.  Adding another person on makes them a consolation prize BM and they will know that they were 1) not your first pick and 2) that you're only asking them to make the sides even and "fix" your pictures (side note, no one cares, and uneven wedding parties look great).
  
  Support your sister as she gets ready for this next huge step in her life. 
  

  
  

  
  

  

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• jkingley2015 member

  

  February 2015

  I agree with that, that's what I am worried about I don't want to have a divide in the family over something like this its not worth it in the end, and I don't want someone else to feel like they are a second pick. I'm excited to have another baby in the family, and I want my sister to do what is right for her. I just wasn't sure what to do. Or what others would do. 

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• levioosa member

  

  February 2015

  jkingley2015 said:

  I agree with that, that's what I am worried about I don't want to have a divide in the family over something like this its not worth it in the end, and I don't want someone else to feel like they are a second pick. I'm excited to have another baby in the family, and I want my sister to do what is right for her. I just wasn't sure what to do. Or what others would do. 

  You can't always plan life out.  Continue as if she is going to be there, but if she can't make it, it's okay.  If you guilt her or replace her, I guarantee that it WILL cause family drama. 
  

  
  

  
  

  

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• mikenberger member

  

  February 2015

  jkingley2015 said:

  I agree with that, that's what I am worried about I don't want to have a divide in the family over something like this its not worth it in the end, and I don't want someone else to feel like they are a second pick. I'm excited to have another baby in the family, and I want my sister to do what is right for her. I just wasn't sure what to do. Or what others would do. 

  I don't understand where the family divide comes from? Your sister has a baby, YAY! You get married, YAY! If she's unable to attend, that's quite alright. She had a BABY. If someone creates drama over it, that's their choice. 
  
  I wouldn't replace her though or ask her if she wants out. If she wants to drop out, she will. If she wants to attend, she will. I wouldn't hang my hat on either one. Just be a supportive sister

  
  

  
  

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• southernbelle0915 mod

  

  February 2015

  Even sides aren't really a thing anymore, so don't worry about it.

  
  

  I would reserve your sister's spot as MOH. If she can make it, she'll stand up there with you. If she can't make it, your other 3 BMs will be up there. It really doesn't matter if there are 3 BMs and 4 GMs or 10 BMs and 2 GMs. Who cares?

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• jkingley2015 member

  

  February 2015

  Well thanks everyone! I am going to just play it by ear, leave a spot for my sister and if its uneven its uneven. 

  
  

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