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Military Brides
Knottie28448692
member
Trying to set a date, Don't know when FI's Technical Training School Begins
Hello!
Currently, my fiance is in an ROTC program at college. We both graduate this upcoming May. Here are the facts we know so far:
*His training will be 6 months at Base X. We also know where his base is after.
What we don't know:
*When that 6 month training starts. We also don't know when we'll be told.
-Kinda hard to plan a wedding when you don't know a date....
So from what I've gathered in my research, and him from questions he asks the Cadre at ROTC, is that normally they are not allowed to take leave during Technical Training School. (I do know the visitation rules in regards to phases and everything. Yes I also know about Exodus.) So if we set a date say in September, but we find out that his training will begin in July, then we're hosed. Which is why we've been putting off setting the date, so that we don't have to make any cancellations or anything.
We do, however, want to get married before he goes to Technical Training School (if the stars align). We want this for our hearts, the extra allowances he would get with us being married, and I could get a Military ID and visit him On Base. (Note: I am not planning on moving with him to his base. Study comes first. And I can keep my job down here during that time.)
So we had resigned ourselves to put everything on hold until we find out his EAD for Tech School.
However, earlier this week he met with a General. He originally was vague with his question, just asking about his EAD, but the General saw right through it and knew he was asking because he was getting married. He then told my FI that they will make it work, that his commander would probably grant him 3 days leave to go home and get married (just that we would have to do Honeymoon a different time, which we were expecting anyways). The General then turned to the ROTC Cadre and told them to make it work. That they can move the training date up a month, back a month, etc.
So now I am completely confused. Of course, I WANT to believe the General, and that we can just set a date and not worry about it. But how can I? when everything else I've seen is that he must stay at Tech School, no leave, can't even leave 25 miles from the base?
Also, I am Catholic and planning a Catholic Wedding. I know plenty of Military couples choose to have a Justice of the Peace Ceremony, and then the Big Ole' Wedding later. However, this is not what I want in my heart of hearts.
Has anyone else been in this situation? What should I do? I feel like we just need to wait to actually know his EAD, but I guess I just wanted to vent and get some advice!
Thank you!
Currently, my fiance is in an ROTC program at college. We both graduate this upcoming May. Here are the facts we know so far:
*His training will be 6 months at Base X. We also know where his base is after.
What we don't know:
*When that 6 month training starts. We also don't know when we'll be told.
-Kinda hard to plan a wedding when you don't know a date....
So from what I've gathered in my research, and him from questions he asks the Cadre at ROTC, is that normally they are not allowed to take leave during Technical Training School. (I do know the visitation rules in regards to phases and everything. Yes I also know about Exodus.) So if we set a date say in September, but we find out that his training will begin in July, then we're hosed. Which is why we've been putting off setting the date, so that we don't have to make any cancellations or anything.
We do, however, want to get married before he goes to Technical Training School (if the stars align). We want this for our hearts, the extra allowances he would get with us being married, and I could get a Military ID and visit him On Base. (Note: I am not planning on moving with him to his base. Study comes first. And I can keep my job down here during that time.)
So we had resigned ourselves to put everything on hold until we find out his EAD for Tech School.
However, earlier this week he met with a General. He originally was vague with his question, just asking about his EAD, but the General saw right through it and knew he was asking because he was getting married. He then told my FI that they will make it work, that his commander would probably grant him 3 days leave to go home and get married (just that we would have to do Honeymoon a different time, which we were expecting anyways). The General then turned to the ROTC Cadre and told them to make it work. That they can move the training date up a month, back a month, etc.
So now I am completely confused. Of course, I WANT to believe the General, and that we can just set a date and not worry about it. But how can I? when everything else I've seen is that he must stay at Tech School, no leave, can't even leave 25 miles from the base?
Also, I am Catholic and planning a Catholic Wedding. I know plenty of Military couples choose to have a Justice of the Peace Ceremony, and then the Big Ole' Wedding later. However, this is not what I want in my heart of hearts.
Has anyone else been in this situation? What should I do? I feel like we just need to wait to actually know his EAD, but I guess I just wanted to vent and get some advice!
Thank you!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Trying to set a date, Don't know when FI's Technical Training School Begins
ETA: No matter when you decide to have it get military clauses.
If it were me, I would wait until he's BOLC complete. Or I'd get planning and do it the weekend of graduation. Being married right before separation sucks. Having a wedding to plan distracts from the suck. And don't get married for BAH. Is he going to be active duty? If so, he's going to have to pay for housing at BOLC anyway. Guard and Reserve pay less and get stuck in lodging IME, because they're meant to maintain a home in their state. The difference between married and single rate is not enough to rush a wedding.
Yeah, the pay is only a minor influence. We just want it in our heart of hearts. If we have to wait until after he's out of training, then so be it.
And yes he will be active duty, entering in as a 2nd Lt. And from what I've read, if they are married, even though they are living in a dorm, they get paid the BAH for the "family at home" to have a place to live in the meantime. (which reads to me like if they're not married, and living in dorms, they don't get BAH at all, right?) But again, that's only a minor influence in us wanting to get married before-hand.
Another influence though is getting on his orders at his "permanent base" after training. Thankfully his base is only a 10-11 hour drive from where we live currently, but it sure would be nice to not have to pay to move all of our things! lol
Does anyone know if in the Air Force if there is any time in between training and full-on job (besides just travel)? Because that might be an option. Everything is just still so up in the air. I guess I really can't plan anything at all until we know his EAD.