ex vent! UGH!!

Re: ex vent! UGH!!

• Sue-n-Kevin member

  

  March 2012

  I'm sorry you are going through this. I'm sure others who maybe have more experience will have advice.
  
  Do you have a divorce decree that states he has to carry the insurance? If so, he has to abide by this. Secondly, when it expired, I think a COBRA notice should have been rendered to you (based on the fact that I got one when my son's insurance was cancelled when he stopped being a full time studen). I'd call the insurance carrier and see what your options are.

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• handfast4me member

  

  March 2012

  I dealt with a similar issue with my ex (I was paying alimony in the form of paying off his grad school debt).  The ONLY thing he had to do was to keep our daughter on his tricare, since he is a disabled vet.  He let it lapse, and I didn't find that out until DD went to the ER needing stitcheswhen she cut her hand. 
  
  Unfortunately, because she was over the age of 18 at the time, the courts here in GA don't/won't hold up any of this legally, even if he agreed to it.  So, I ended up getting a policy for her.  It was really expensive, due to a pre-existing condition (please do NOT get me started on health care FINANCE reform--and boy, do I wish the politicians would call it that, it takes on a whole different meaning then, doesn't it?) and had a 2000 deductible. 
  
  Yes, this is why they're x-husband.  Sorry for your troubles. 

  Don't mess with the old dogs; age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! BS and brilliance only come with age and experience.

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• Jess11213 member

  

  March 2012

  The divorce decree does say he has to carry the insurance and the cancellation notice I got gives COBRA options.  I can just put the two kids on my current insurance, but the whole point is that I shouldn't have to.  It also makes my insurance cost go up 300%.

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• thejilliebean

  

  March 2012

  That sucks....
  
  But, I say if you can get full custody go for it. I know that may sound heartless. But, I feel like it is easier to explain a complete absence then not knowing when they will participate.
  
  If you can't stomach that, you can definitely file something in court and make him have to make good on the original court agreement.
  
  Unfortuantely I had a really yucky divorce. I've been to court about 16 times in the last 3 years. So, I know more than I ever want to know. In my state the ex can't sign away his rights unless I remarry.
  
  Good Luck.

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• xobride

  

  March 2012

  Have you gotten the Attorney General involved?  I'm not sure how it works in your state, but here in Texas, for $25 a year (they just started charging) the AG will handle wage garnishment and insurance enforcement.  It takes a while to get in their system here and you have to stay on top of it, but if it wasn't for them taking it out of his paycheck, I wouldn't get it either and if it wasn't for them sending the company the order for insurance, he wouldn't carry it on them.  He hasn't seen them in 2 years so I totally feel your pain.  If you can afford an attorney, you can get things done much faster, but I know that can be a challenge.

  

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• coopsbaby member

  

  March 2012

  I totally feel your pain! My ex has liberal visitation with our kids, he sees them once every 3-4 months for about 20minutes. He only lives 25 minutes away for crying out loud!

  
  

  AND, he doesn't carry insurance on them either. I've gone to the court, and child support, and all they can do is send a request to his place of employment for insurance info, or they can't force him to get it. I've told them repeatedly that he's the manager and he opens the mail. I have no question that when he gets the requests he just trashes them. I've got the two youngest on state insurance, but our college age son can't get insurance, not through his job or the state. He could get it through hid dad though. And he's the one who keeps getting sick/hurt. Very frustrating! 

  
  

  My ex does pay child support though, so I need to be thankful for that! And for fi, who is a wonderful father figure for my kids.

  
  

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• Iggy85

  

  March 2012

  I am so sorry that you are having to go through this. Stuff like this makes me thankful that I have a baby daddy that is involved as much as he can be as a truck driver and that he does more than his share to help me out with DD.

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• mdeidre

  

  March 2012

  Your ex is a deadbeat dad and a complete jerk.  More importantly, he's a complete jerk that's in contempt of court.  File a motion with the domestic relations court (or whichever court you went through for your divorce because they have jurisdiction) for contempt of court, since he is currently in violation of a court order (your divorce decree) and they will give him an amount of time to comply or get locked up.  This is something the court takes very seriously.  My FI's ex was in contempt of court for violating their divorce decree (for a different reason) and that's what they told her.

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