Is this a good format for my RSVP cards?

suteki325 · February 2015

Hello everyone.

I've been confused as to the best way to word my RSVP cards to ensure that I get non-confusing responses on them and actually know how many guests will be attending per household that I've invited. I've attached a picture of the card below. Any tips or advice on these would be great. Thanks!

AddieCake · February 2015

I think that works. Having the spot for ___ guests attending is very helpful.

southernbelle0915 · February 2015

Ours said something like

"blah blah blah, RSVP by blah blah"

___ Number attending

___ Decline with regret"

LtPowers · February 2015

I'm afraid I would find it quite confusing. If there's a spot for indicating how many are attending, what are the blanks before "accepts with pleasure" and "declines with regret" for?

[Deleted User] · February 2015

LtPowers said:

I'm afraid I would find it quite confusing. If there's a spot for indicating how many are attending, what are the blanks before "accepts with pleasure" and "declines with regret" for?

That option is, for example, if you invite your Aunt Sue and Uncle Joe, but Joe is too ill to travel, Sue would check "Accepts with Pleasure" and then write "1 Guest Attending," so you don't accidentally count both of the invitees in your final headcount.

LtPowers · February 2015

sylveonplath said:

LtPowers said:

I'm afraid I would find it quite confusing. If there's a spot for indicating how many are attending, what are the blanks before "accepts with pleasure" and "declines with regret" for?

That option is, for example, if you invite your Aunt Sue and Uncle Joe, but Joe is too ill to travel, Sue would check "Accepts with Pleasure" and then write "1 Guest Attending," so you don't accidentally count both of the invitees in your final headcount.

But what does "Accepts with Pleasure" tell you that the "1 guest attending" doesn't? And wouldn't Uncle Joe also check "Declines with Regret"?

theartistformerlyknownas · February 2015

I would worry that this implies each party has three spaces to fill, even if you've only invited 1 or 2.

You could make that more clear by making the bottom line say "number attending: ____ of 2” (or however, where you would fill in the "of" number). I think there should also only be one "M" ahead of the name line (or skip the M entirely), then it looks more like lots of space to fill in names rather than 3 distinct names.

LtPowers · February 2015

This is, of course, one of the reasons why response cards have never been recommended by experts. Trying to devise a one-size-fits-all solution is an exercise in futility.

A good compromise, which still allows the very useful number-the-back trick, is a blank response card that simply says "The favor of a reply is requested", optionally with a deadline included. Then the guest can compose the response as needed for his or her situation.

theartistformerlyknownas · February 2015

LtPowers said:

This is, of course, one of the reasons why response cards have never been recommended by experts. Trying to devise a one-size-fits-all solution is an exercise in futility.

A good compromise, which still allows the very useful number-the-back trick, is a blank response card that simply says "The favor of a reply is requested", optionally with a deadline included. Then the guest can compose the response as needed for his or her situation.

Yeah, because the general wedding-going public in 2015 is super accustomed to composing their own formal wedding replies. Come on. If checking a box or writing in a number is too difficult, do you really think people are going to know what the fuck to write on a blank card?

Seriously, what year do you think it is? Your advice is so stuck in the past it's laughable.

suteki325 · February 2015

Alternate idea -

What if I just put in one response card per person invited (Example - Send one invite to a household where two are invited, so I put in two response cards). Then hand-write each guest's name on their individual card (Ex. Mr. Bob Bobs). And then underneath the __ Accepts with Pleasure __ Declines with Regret for them to check off. Or is that making it too complicated?

theartistformerlyknownas · February 2015

suteki325 said:
Alternate idea -

What if I just put in one response card per person invited (Example - Send one invite to a household where two are invited, so I put in two response cards). Then hand-write each guest's name on their individual card (Ex. Mr. Bob Bobs). And then underneath the __ Accepts with Pleasure __ Declines with Regret for them to check off. Or is that making it too complicated?

Way too complicated, and double (or more) the cost. Keep it simple and most people will figure it out! Some still won't no matter how easy you make it for them.

suteki325 · February 2015

Good point. It would double the cost.

So, instead -

No M_______ for guests to fill in names.
Simply a ___ Attending __ Decline option.
Then, underneath, the __ Number of Guests Attending

That way, even if Mr. Bob Bobs decides not to come, but his wife Mrs. Bobs decides to come, she'll check ___ Attending. Then, fill in a "1" in the number attending. That way I'll know how many per household are attending.

Whew! Who knew that wording these suckers would be such a headache??

LtPowers · February 2015

But without names you won't know who is attending, if not everyone invited can come.

LtPowers · February 2015

lolo883 said:

LtPowers said:

This is, of course, one of the reasons why response cards have never been recommended by experts. Trying to devise a one-size-fits-all solution is an exercise in futility.

A good compromise, which still allows the very useful number-the-back trick, is a blank response card that simply says "The favor of a reply is requested", optionally with a deadline included. Then the guest can compose the response as needed for his or her situation.

Yeah, because the general wedding-going public in 2015 is super accustomed to composing their own formal wedding replies. Come on. If checking a box or writing in a number is too difficult, do you really think people are going to know what the fuck to write on a blank card?

Seriously, what year do you think it is? Your advice is so stuck in the past it's laughable.

I'm sorry you think so poorly of your friends and family. It's not like it's a difficult task to compose a response to an invitation. Seriously, how incompetent do you think everyone is?

VulgarGirl · February 2015

@LtPowers‌ I'm pretty smart chick. If I got a blank card I'd throw in the trash. Cause who the fuck sends blank cards? Must have been a mistake.

theartistformerlyknownas · February 2015

LtPowers said:

But without names you won't know who is attending, if not everyone invited can come.

I never said not to put names, I said not to have 3 lines with an M at the front of each of them because that depicts three individual titles. That could be six people! The "M" is unnecessary and lots of my guests skipped it. Lots of people here didn't even know it meant to stand for the beginning of Mr. or Ms. And it's completely exclusionary to doctors!

suteki325 · February 2015

Okay. So what if I just go ahead and put three or four M____ lines and just handwrite in the names of everyone invited in the household? I'm sorely confused as to the best way to do this. Either I have just one M____ line (which wouldn't be enough, as at least two people per household are invited) or I put three M___ lines (and then people might add in their own guests), or I handwrite each person who is invited per household, but then I don't know who's coming vs who's not, as there would be only one __ Accepts with pleasure __ Declines with regret. What if I put three M___, then underneath EACH one, the ___ Accepts ___ Declines option. That way I know if Mr. Bob Bobs isn't coming, but his wife IS coming. ???

theartistformerlyknownas · February 2015

suteki325 said:

Okay. So what if I just go ahead and put three or four M____ lines and just handwrite in the names of everyone invited in the household? I'm sorely confused as to the best way to do this. Either I have just one M____ line (which wouldn't be enough, as at least two people per household are invited) or I put three M___ lines (and then people might add in their own guests), or I handwrite each person who is invited per household, but then I don't know who's coming vs who's not, as there would be only one __ Accepts with pleasure __ Declines with regret. What if I put three M___, then underneath EACH one, the ___ Accepts ___ Declines option. That way I know if Mr. Bob Bobs isn't coming, but his wife IS coming. ???

There is normally only one M. It's then filled in as

Mr and Mrs Incredible

or

Mr Tony Stark and Ms Pepper Potts

or

Miss Kim Possible

You don't need an extra M just because someone is bringing a date. They're fully capable of writing the second one themselves, I promise. Or they won't know what the hell the M stands for, and just write Bob and Sally. You will still know who is coming. If you think they can't fit two names on one line, you can add an extra line below, but it doesn't need the M. (And then if you invite John Jacob Jingleheimer-Schmidt, he can feel free to carry his name to the second line without there being a random M in the middle of it.

If Mr Bob isn't coming but his wife is, she'll only fill in Mrs Sally and then check accepts and then write 1 attending.

I'm telling you now, if you put 4 Ms, people will think they can bring 3 additional people with them instead of 1 and will add extra below what you've filled in.

You're making this way more difficult than it needs to be.

VulgarGirl · February 2015

I did not know what the M meant until I came on here. I just always wrote "Fiona Sassypants and Sophie Cutiepie" on whatever line was provided.

OliveOilsMom · February 2015

Also, you said 1 invite per household. Just remember that anyone over 18 needs their own separate invitation. And children wouldn't require the "M" on their line anyway, as Master and Miss are not often used for kids under 18 any more.

Is this a good format for my RSVP cards?

Re: Is this a good format for my RSVP cards?

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