Hello all. I'm trying to do a little pre-planning for my bridal shower, which probably won't be for another 9 months or so.
I'm having a very small wedding party, basically just my sister as MOH and my good friend as a bridesmaid. Since my sister is younger than me and still in school in another city she can't afford/doesn't have the time to throw the shower, so my bridesmaid has offered to have it at her house.
The problem is, my mother has had a distinct dislike for her since high school. I don't really know why, she was the opposite of a bad influence on me, and has generally been a good friend for many years. She just doesn't like her personality I guess, and has had made this very clear for a long time. I'm very worried this will create tension or awkwardness which I'd really rather avoid entirely.
Honestly I would prefer to not have any family at all at my shower- I like to keep family and friends separate. But everyone says you must have your immediate female family and in-laws at your shower. I know my mom will be upset if she's not invited, but she'll be upset that my bridesmaid is hosting it at the same time. I'd love to have a separate family shower, but my family is scattered around the country, so it would probably only be my sister, mother, and MIL who could make it in my hometown.
How ok is it to simply not bring it up and hope she forgets about the shower entirely, and have it without telling her or my sister? Or just a little white lie and say I don't want a shower and have it without her knowledge?