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Intro and Officiant question

jdgardinjdgardin
10 Comments
in Michigan-Detroit
Good Morning everyone!  I've been stalking the boards (pretty heavily I have to admit) for the last few months but have never posted much of anything.  I normally search for related posts and just read.

I've been engage since April of last year and we are planning a September 18th wedding up in Onekama, Michigan right on the water.

Here's my delema.  We recently had to ask our pastor from down state to marry us because the one we had asked (mine from high school) has resigned from the church for several reasons.  Due to these reasons, my FI and I don't believe he should marry us anymore.  Since our new Pastor will have to travel 3 hours now to marry us and won't be attending just as a guest, my FI and I planned to pay for his room for Friday and Saturday night.  I was just going to go for the base room, nothing special, until my FI said maybe we should give him an option to pay extra since he's going to use it as a weekend away from the kids.

Now... if we pay for his room, do we still pay him and how much?
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Re: Intro and Officiant question

  • emarston1emarston1 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I would think that yes, you should still pay him.  He is a vendor and therefore he should be paid.  As for how much, you could ask him how much he charges for a typical wedding and go with that.

    ETA:  Oops forgot to say welcome and congrats!
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  • cmkunocmkuno
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Welcome to the board!  

    I agree, you still need to pay him.  I would get him a room wherever you're blocking rooms for the rest of your guests.  Maybe run it by him first to make sure he's ok with staying there and in that type of room.  I'm guessing if he wants something extra, he would just tell you and offer to pay for it himself.  But he's doing you a pretty big favor, so you should definitely cover his expenses plus something on top of that.  If he says he doesn't want to charge you anything, you should make a donation to his church.  

    I've heard officiant fees anywhere from $100 - $500.  I'm sorry I can't be of more help than that, our officiant fee is rolled into the church fee so I don't even know what it is!
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  • sunkissed212sunkissed212 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Ditto to the others...

    and welcome!
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  • karolinawsukarolinawsu member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Speaking on this topic, my fiance called today to meet with our pastor.....turns out he went on vacation and wont be back until the end of August!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  The priest he talked to suggested that we change our wedding date!?!?!?!  I can't believe this!

    Now we have to get married by the rude priest... this should be interesting.
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  • corinne2010corinne2010
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Welcome and congrats!

    I agree with pp though, you should definitely pay the priest. Ask him how much he charges for weddings and go from there.
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  • jdgardinjdgardin
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011

    Thanks for the advice and opinions ladies.  I think we'll have to discuss this at our next pre-marriage counseling session.

    I do want to clarify though so I don't sound like an unclassy cheap-o like I think my first post made me sound.  My FI and I have become very close friends with our Pastor (think couples dinners and such) and he offered to co-officiate with our original Pastor b/c he was bummed that we didn't ask him.  He was already going to be at the wedding... it's not like we sprang a three hour drive on him unexpectedly.  He had already booked a room, and I just called the place to change the credit card it was on.

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