Wedding processional help!

Re: Wedding processional help!

• MnHGirl member

  

  February 2015 edited February 2015

  For your stepmother you could have her escorted down the isle by an usher or by your father and then he would walk back to escort you down the isle. This would take place before the whole wedding party processional.

  
  

  The groom and his parents would go before the bridesmaids/groomsman enter. 
  

  
  

  I have seen both ways with grandparents but I do not think it is expected. My Grandma for example does NOT want to be specially escorted (I have asked her). She said that she walks too slow, and wants to come in the side door towards the front of the church to avoid having to walk too much  

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• yellowdaisies84 member

  

  February 2015

  So regardless of how close you are with your stepmother, it is a nice touch to have her escorted down the aisle. Some people have escorts for their step-grandparents and some people don't. It's not an etiquette-must. You do not need to arrange an escort for them if you prefer not to.

  
  

  Are the grooms parents going to stand up with you during the ceremony or will they walk him down the aisle and then take their seats? Are you guys looking to follow a traditional Jewish processional in terms of the order you want people to enter in?

  "It's always better when we're together." -Jack Johnson

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• bananasplit472001 member

  

  February 2015

  It is not generally expected to have your step-grandparents walk down the aisle.  I would think it strange as they are not biological relatives of the bride or groom.  As for the step-mother it is also not required for her to walk down the aisle.  You can really chose to have whoever you want walk.  My FI parents are divorced and his step-mother is in no way involved in the wedding or processional.  To me it just would not make any sense.  Who would she walk with if your father and step-father are both walking her down the aisle?  It is considered an honor to be in the bridal party and thus part of the processional and you should only have who you want.

  

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• saric83 member

  

  February 2015

  I would just have your dad escort your stepmom and come back down for you.  Who is escorting your mom?

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• SP29 member

  

  February 2015

  I would have your stepmom escorted either by an usher or your dad prior to the processional starting.

  
  

  Step grand parents are up to you. Unless you are following a traditional ceremony, there really aren't rules, you can mix things how you'd like.

  
  

  Neither of our grandparents were escorted, but they all sat in the first two rows (both our grandmothers have mobility issues and it would be better for them to settle in earlier). 

  
  

  My parents are separated and in relationships, but not remarried. Neither SO was escorted but both got to sit in the front row with my parents (their respective partner). 

  
  

  DH's dad came in alone prior to the recessional. Processional started. My brothers escorted my mom in. DH escorted his mom in then took his place at the front. WP then came in. Then my dad and myself. 

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• Knottie35184479 member

  

  February 2015

  @yellowdaises84 We are having an interfaith wedding ceremony with some of the jewish elements then some christian traditions like the lighting of the unity candle. His parents will walk him down and then take their seats. I want bridesmaids to walk themselves down aisle. We are getting married outside near the water. There is no side entrance or side aisle so if someone ushered down someone then the would have to come back up the center aisle. My brother is a groomsman and will be walking my mother down the aisle. The plan was to have the officiate already down at his spot, then the groomsman will walk in, in pairs, then my mother will come down being escorted by my brother then after he escorts her he will take his spot behind all the other groomsman, then groom with his parents, and lastly the bridesmaids, MOH, and ring bearer.

   

  I know its a bit untraditional but by having a blended ceremony we have to work around some things.  I am still on the fence about my stepmother, we just do not have that bond and i did not grow up with her. If I did have her escorted where would she be inserted into the above processional idea?

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• lovegood90 member

  

  February 2015

  Knottie35184479 said:

  @yellowdaises84 We are having an interfaith wedding ceremony with some of the jewish elements then some christian traditions like the lighting of the unity candle. His parents will walk him down and then take their seats. I want bridesmaids to walk themselves down aisle. We are getting married outside near the water. There is no side entrance or side aisle so if someone ushered down someone then the would have to come back up the center aisle. My brother is a groomsman and will be walking my mother down the aisle. The plan was to have the officiate already down at his spot, then the groomsman will walk in, in pairs, then my mother will come down being escorted by my brother then after he escorts her he will take his spot behind all the other groomsman, then groom with his parents, and lastly the bridesmaids, MOH, and ring bearer.

   

  I know its a bit untraditional but by having a blended ceremony we have to work around some things.  I am still on the fence about my stepmother, we just do not have that bond and i did not grow up with her. If I did have her escorted where would she be inserted into the above processional idea?

  Why can't she just take her seat at the beginning with the other guests? Then when your dad is done walking you down the aisle, he can take a seat next to her?
  

  Formerly martha1818

  

  
  

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• MandyMost member

  

  February 2015

  lovegood90 said:

  Knottie35184479 said:

  @yellowdaises84 We are having an interfaith wedding ceremony with some of the jewish elements then some christian traditions like the lighting of the unity candle. His parents will walk him down and then take their seats. I want bridesmaids to walk themselves down aisle. We are getting married outside near the water. There is no side entrance or side aisle so if someone ushered down someone then the would have to come back up the center aisle. My brother is a groomsman and will be walking my mother down the aisle. The plan was to have the officiate already down at his spot, then the groomsman will walk in, in pairs, then my mother will come down being escorted by my brother then after he escorts her he will take his spot behind all the other groomsman, then groom with his parents, and lastly the bridesmaids, MOH, and ring bearer.

   

  I know its a bit untraditional but by having a blended ceremony we have to work around some things.  I am still on the fence about my stepmother, we just do not have that bond and i did not grow up with her. If I did have her escorted where would she be inserted into the above processional idea?

  Why can't she just take her seat at the beginning with the other guests? Then when your dad is done walking you down the aisle, he can take a seat next to her?
  

  Some people would view that as a slight, as in they're not important enough to walk down the aisle. People are weird. So if you don't want to deal with that, just have her escorted in. It's totally fine to "assign" someone else to walk her in as part of the family processional, prior to the bridal party coming in. An usher, a different family member, does she have a son? It can really be anyone.

  
  

  I didn't do a traditional bridal party or processional at all, but we paired everyone up to walk in. It was:

  
  

  Groom and his mom

  Groom's dad and groom's sister

  Bride's Sister-in-Law (brother's wife) and a bride's close cousin

  Bride's mom and bride's close cousin

  Bride and Bride's brother

  
  

  So essentially we had the two cousin's stand in as escorts. 

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• pennydl member

  

  February 2015

  My FH and I are also from different religious backgrounds. I'm Jewish, he is Lutheran and we plan on combining some traditions from both of our faith's. As Mnhgirl already mentioned, if your Groom's parents are walking him down the aisle, they start the procession. FYI: be aware that it is also a Jewish tradition that the parents will remain up front with the wedding party and not seated with the rest of the guests. You might want to ask your in-laws if they plan on doing that so you're not caught off guard.

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• bananasplit472001 member

  

  February 2015

  pennydl said:

  My FH and I are also from different religious backgrounds. I'm Jewish, he is Lutheran and we plan on combining some traditions from both of our faith's. As Mnhgirl already mentioned, if your Groom's parents are walking him down the aisle, they start the procession. FYI: be aware that it is also a Jewish tradition that the parents will remain up front with the wedding party and not seated with the rest of the guests. You might want to ask your in-laws if they plan on doing that so you're not caught off guard.

  Yes, this is very true and it is important to ask if this is something that they feel strongly about.  My FI is jewish and we have decided to forgo this tradition as his parents are divorced and one has a FI.

  

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• Knottie87702627 member

  

  February 2015

  I would ask your father and step-mother what they would like to do. You may not be close to her, but you are important to your father, and so is she. If you don't really care if she is escorted or not, then ask her what she would like. I would have her seated by an usher, her son, or a groomsmen. Seat her BEFORE your own mother. However, I would also consider the possibility of having YOUR Mom and Dad walk YOU down the aisle. Your Mom may like this, you should ask her. Especially if that is want your FI parents are doing. 

  The general processional would go as follows

  1. Seat Honoured Guests (this would include your step-mother)

  2. Parents of the Groom (not in your case though)

  3. Mother of the Bride

  4. Groom

  5. Groomsmen

  6. Bridesmaids

  7. Ring Bearers

  8. Flowergirl

  9. Bride

  
  

  My best advice is ASK. I have found that people are reasonable, but they will also tell you what is important to them. Try and respect as many of the "this is important" things that you can.

  
  

  Good Luck

  
  

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• SammiNJonni member

  

  February 2015

  I would have her escorted in by an usher before the processional. 

  

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