Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Who Gets Flowers?

Kind of a two part question here...

So as far as I understand it, the groom, best man, FOB and FOG get boutonnieres. Our officiant is a close friend, would it be weird to give him one?  For corsages it will be just the MOB? (MOG and all grandparents have past)

Has anybody seen or not done flowers for the bridesmaids? I only have a MOH, and I have been considering just doing a corsage instead of a bouquet.  We're doing minimal flowers, so this idea has been bouncing around my head.  

Re: Who Gets Flowers?

  • If your only female attendant is your maid of honour, I see no reason why you can't do a corsage instead of a traditional bouquet--or even anything else, to be honest. There is no hard, fast rule that you have to have bouquets (or flowers at all). I have seen some weddings where the bridal party carry pretty clutches instead of bouquets.

    Unfortunately, I have noooo idea about the officiant. I'm sure it wouldn't hurt to give him a boutonniere, but I can't say I've ever seen it done. Unless there is some specific etiquette against it, I'd say break any rule you want!
  • I think it's completely appropriate to give your officiant a boutonniere, especially since it is a close friend. Typically, yes, grandparents and parents get flowers (though it's really all optional).

    For your MOH, you can have her wear or carry anything that works. I would do the pin corsages over the wrist corsages, however (though you can always ask what she would like better!). Wrist corsages make me think prom.

  • We gave our (female) officiant a corsage, so I'm sure that you could give yours a bout.

    This idea was mentioned by our florist, and it seemed fitting to me, as the role is pretty important and all. :tongue:
  • We gave our officiant a corsage. Then she asked if we could give her a bout instead because it was smaller and less likely to get in her way. No big deal since I made plenty extras of each just in case.

  • DH and our groomsmen had pocket squares and the bridal party and I had parasols. There was not a single flower in my wedding and we had a lot of fun with the parasols. Some of the best pics from my wedding are of the groom and groomsmen posing and playing with the parasols.


  • Our parents/grandparents, ushers, officiants, and ceremony musicians all had bouts or corsages. 
    **The OMH formerly known as jsangel1018**
  • We gave our officiant a boutonniere.  He was our pastor. Your bridesmaid doesn't have to carry a bouquet. If you google "bridesmaids without bouquets" there are a million non-flower options for things to carry.  Everything from a single flower to books to lanterns to pinwheels to a really weird thing that looks like a rolled up piece of paper tied with a ribbon.  It looks like a high school diploma.  Or she can carry nothing at all.
  • Sounds good! Thank you everyone!
  • Give flowers to whomever you want.  We wanted to keep flowers minimal, too.  We did small bouquets for bridesmaids and my bouquet but that was it.  No boutonniere's for guys (not even groom) and no corsages for anyone.  I don't think anyone was upset that they didn't get one.    


  • I'm glad I read this thread. I hadn't thought of giving a corsage to my officiant. I've now added her to the list. We've got flowers everywhere in this wedding... real and paper... so what's one more!


    But as to the OP, I think you can do whatever you want. There's no law saying that you have to have bouquets for your party.

  • Generally speaking, boutonnieres are how you visually encode men at the wedding, so you want something for each role. That way, gusts can quickly establish groom, best man, groomsmen, fathers (who would often match the groomsmen, if memory serves), and, if you have them, ushers. Of course, traditionally male members of the bridal party just wear whatever matches the dress code and appear uniform simply because menswear never looks out of place.
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