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Lord, give me strength...Ranting already.

vsgalvsgal member
Eighth Anniversary 250 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Beware--Rant below.

I got the first wedding invitation of the season.  I use the term invitation loosely.  It came 3 weeks before the wedding addressed to my H only by name on a printed label.  The couple knows that we are married.  The invite didn't have an RSVP card but it did have the registry information including the "awesome" honeyfund link. 

So, today I found out via a friend of a friend that I was indeed invited.  They told him they forgot to put my name on the invite, you know because the groom-to-be printed the labels. Like that is a good excuse.  H is happy because now he doesn't have to go alone.

So, I guess I am going to this shit show of a wedding that is at 3:00 on a Friday at a location that is 1.5 hours away from our house.  Looking forward to the inevitable cash bar that I am sure will be there.  Lord, help me...

Rant over.
ROCK IS KING!!
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Re: Lord, give me strength...Ranting already.

  • ChiwatkinsChiwatkins member
    10 Comments Name Dropper
    Sounds like it's going to be as much as shit show as my cousin's destination wedding and PPD.  Why don't people just put in at least as much effort into their wedding day as much as they expect their guests to?
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Sounds like they don't know how to address envelopes and the registry issue is crass, but do you think that they would also do a cash bar based on that or other info?

    3PM on a Friday is inconvenient but it's not really rude.
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  • vsgalvsgal member
    Eighth Anniversary 250 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    Banana, I am just assuming the cash bar only because of a conversation I had with them after our wedding in which we did an open bar.  GTB was shocked and said they would never do that if they ever got married.  I don't know--maybe someone will have knocked some sense into them, but I highly doubt it. 
    ROCK IS KING!!
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Ahh.   So they're one of THOSE couples. 
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Hey, we need you to go and report back to us on this shitshow. Inquiring minds really want to know.
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  • redoryxredoryx member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    You don't have to go. If the 3 pm Friday is inconvenient for you, tell them that. And, well, if you just really don't want to go, well, the inconvenience of a 3 pm Friday wedding is a good enough excuse.
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  • JellyBean52513JellyBean52513 member
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments First Answer
    vsgal said:

    Banana, I am just assuming the cash bar only because of a conversation I had with them after our wedding in which we did an open bar.  GTB was shocked and said they would never do that if they ever got married.  I don't know--maybe someone will have knocked some sense into them, but I highly doubt it. 

    Ugh I really cannot stand when people do shit like this. They behave as if their opinion is 1. wanted, 2. important, 3. acceptable to provide when not asked for and completely offensive to the person they're talking to.

    Why is it so shocking that  a couple would fully host their event? Why would you NEVER do such a thing? Why do you think the couple gives a fuck about what you would and would never do? 

    This is how my old boss was. "I'd NEVER do open bar, it's a waste of money and people just take advantage. I'm NOT inviting couples unless you're already married and I actually like your spouse, my wedding is not your date night and I'm not paying for someone's flavor of the week. You HAVE to set your RSVP date for at least a month out from the wedding so you have plenty of time to track down the idiots who don't know how to RSVP on time." People can be so freaking vocal with their opinions, not even knowing how rude and offensive they're being. 
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  • mikenbergermikenberger member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    hahaha I'm getting married 3pm on a Friday. 

    I guess I missed the open bar and honeymoon fund. 
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  • vsgalvsgal member
    Eighth Anniversary 250 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    edited March 2015
    The good news is that hubby just told me that we are going to make a weekend of it.  We will go to the wedding/reception.  If it is truly horrendous, we are going to bolt to our next destination unknown for some fun and relaxation.  So, there is the silver lining.

    Edit to add:
    You are right.  Friday weddings are not rude.  Just that coupled with all the other nonsense is an annoyance.  Between the honeyfund, cash bar and some other things I heard this morning, it all adds to the frustration surrounding the wedding.  If the only thing was the Friday ceremony, I really wouldn't be bothered at all.



    ROCK IS KING!!
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  • kvrunskvruns member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    decline!
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  • swiftsticksswiftsticks member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments Name Dropper
    edited March 2015
    It sounds like you're going and it could be fun. And you're right, it could be a total shit show.

    Keep your expectations low. Like, really low. Don't expect anything. Consider it a bonus when anything good happens, like having a warm meal at a reception or a seat for the wedding ceremony. 

    Bring plenty of cash for the bar/parking/post wedding snark with your spouse at the closest fast food place post wedding. It stinks leaving a wedding sober and hungry, so maybe bring a full flask and some snacks with you too. 

    ETA - Yes, any event should be hosted properly and having things like a seat and a meal should be expected, but it sounds like this couple is clueless. It sucks to attend an event that isn't hosted properly after you've done everything you could to make your guests comfortable at your own wedding.
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