Is my website wording ok?

japlanet · April 2015

After the rehearsal dinner we plan to go hang out in the bar attached to the restaurant, and we would welcome anyone who is town to drop by and have a drink with us - but we don't plan on hosting the bar. Is this ok? If so, is this appropriate wording?

"In town the night before the wedding with not much to do? We will be having a drink or two at our neighbourhood restaurant, and would love to have you drop by and say hi!"

If not hosting the bar is poor etiquette I can try to work something out with the restaurant (they won't be shutting the bar down just for us, so it would require drink tickets or something to seperate our guests from the general public).

minttobemrsb · April 2015

I probably wouldn't say anything about it on the website. I would just tell people via word of mouth. Then there shouldn't be a confusion as to whether you are hosting. Just tell your friends and family that's where you'll be after and to feel free to spread the word.

littlepep · April 2015

My friend did this, but she just told people via word of mouth instead of posting it anywhere. She just said hey, after the rehearsal dinner we will be at X bar if you want to come by.

novella1186 · April 2015

I agree with PP. Spread this by word of mouth. Listing it on the website could give the impression that it's hosted.

My wedding is less than 3 weeks away and most people are coming in from out of town. People are already contacting my parents, FI's parents, and us to say "hey we're coming in at x time on Friday and staying at x hotel for the whole weekend" (wedding is Saturday). So it would be pretty easy for the parents and us to spread the word. "Well, we'll be at x location at x time on Friday! You should stop by!"

Tell your parents and any family gossips or the most social person in your friend groups, and have them spread the word.

Jen4948 · April 2015

I agree with PPs: put this information out by word-of-mouth. Putting it on your website or in your invitations could lead people reading it to believe that it's a hosted event when it isn't.

levioosa · April 2015

Word of mouth is best. Putting it on the wedding website would make it seem like it is part of the event, and therefore hosted.

japlanet · April 2015

So after some thought and discussing with FH we decided that we will fully host the post-rehearsal dinner drinks (and keep the info up on the website). The problem is, how do we buy drinks for everyone all night without buying out the bar/closing the bar to the public?

I have contacted the restaurant and they basically gave us the following options

1. Drink tickets - we give to guests, they use to pay for the drink, and then the bar tallies up the drinks and charges us at the end of the night. A bit more annoying for the guests but easier for the bar to keep track of

2. Open tab - Guests would just say "put it on X and Y's tab" - seems to me this runs the risk of a random person overhearing this and getting free drinks from us all night

3. We personally go up the bar with every guest who wants a drink to confirm that this is our guest and we are buying their drink - seems obviously ridiculous.

Any thoughts/creative solutions to this?

Jen4948 · April 2015

Nope. If you want to provide alcohol to your guests, you either pay for it all out of your own pocket through an open bar, or you pay for a limited selection of alcohol without making available any other alcohol.

Drink tickets are rude. So is any attempt to make guests pay for anything out of their own pockets. If you don't want to pay for alcohol, then you don't provide it. But there is nothing "creative" or polite about inviting guests to your wedding, having alcohol available, and expecting them to purchase it.

iloveotters2014 · April 2015

Jen4948 said:
Nope. If you want to provide alcohol to your guests, you either pay for it all out of your own pocket through an open bar, or you pay for a limited selection of alcohol without making available any other alcohol.

Drink tickets are rude. So is any attempt to make guests pay for anything out of their own pockets. If you don't want to pay for alcohol, then you don't provide it. But there is nothing "creative" or polite about inviting guests to your wedding, having alcohol available, and expecting them to purchase it.

I think you are confused. She IS saying they plan to fully host the post rehearsal dinner drink session. She needs help figuring out how to go about it at a public bar.

OP I think the drink tickets are a bad idea because you don't want people to think they only get one drink if you plan on hosting the rest of the evening.

Is there any way you can give the bar the list of names of who will be there so they know to put them on your tab? without having to worry about randoms trying to get free drinks who don't even know you.

RezIpsa · April 2015

I have been a couple of these that used the paper bracelets you get in nightclubs. Worked great. Each guest gets one and just shows it to the bartender when they get a drink and the drink is added to your tab.

Viczaesar · April 2015

I vote wrist bands, like Knottie#s suggested.

kkitkat79 · April 2015

Jen4948 said:
Nope. If you want to provide alcohol to your guests, you either pay for it all out of your own pocket through an open bar, or you pay for a limited selection of alcohol without making available any other alcohol.

Drink tickets are rude. So is any attempt to make guests pay for anything out of their own pockets. If you don't want to pay for alcohol, then you don't provide it. But there is nothing "creative" or polite about inviting guests to your wedding, having alcohol available, and expecting them to purchase it.

Do you even read?

OP, I too think wrist bands are a great idea.

japlanet · April 2015

Ok yeah, I like the wristband idea - I will ask the bar if they would be ok with this - can't see why not!

Jen4948 · April 2015

kkitkat79 said:

Jen4948 said:
Nope. If you want to provide alcohol to your guests, you either pay for it all out of your own pocket through an open bar, or you pay for a limited selection of alcohol without making available any other alcohol.

Drink tickets are rude. So is any attempt to make guests pay for anything out of their own pockets. If you don't want to pay for alcohol, then you don't provide it. But there is nothing "creative" or polite about inviting guests to your wedding, having alcohol available, and expecting them to purchase it.

Do you even read?

All the time. Every fucking word. Thanks for the laughs.

southernbelle0915 · April 2015

Knottie1428617143 said:
I have been a couple of these that used the paper bracelets you get in nightclubs. Worked great. Each guest gets one and just shows it to the bartender when they get a drink and the drink is added to your tab.

I agree with this.

iloveotters2014 · April 2015

Jen4948 said:

kkitkat79 said:

Jen4948 said:
Nope. If you want to provide alcohol to your guests, you either pay for it all out of your own pocket through an open bar, or you pay for a limited selection of alcohol without making available any other alcohol.

Drink tickets are rude. So is any attempt to make guests pay for anything out of their own pockets. If you don't want to pay for alcohol, then you don't provide it. But there is nothing "creative" or polite about inviting guests to your wedding, having alcohol available, and expecting them to purchase it.

Do you even read?

All the time. Every fucking word. Thanks for the laughs.

Clearly not so much this time

Jen4948 · April 2015

iloveotters2014 said:

Jen4948 said:

kkitkat79 said:

Jen4948 said:
Nope. If you want to provide alcohol to your guests, you either pay for it all out of your own pocket through an open bar, or you pay for a limited selection of alcohol without making available any other alcohol.

Drink tickets are rude. So is any attempt to make guests pay for anything out of their own pockets. If you don't want to pay for alcohol, then you don't provide it. But there is nothing "creative" or polite about inviting guests to your wedding, having alcohol available, and expecting them to purchase it.

Do you even read?

All the time. Every fucking word. Thanks for the laughs.
Clearly not so much this time

Asking if someone ever reads is rude. And since I do read all the time, every word, it was actually comical as well.

southernbelle0915 · April 2015

Jen4948 said:

iloveotters2014 said:

Jen4948 said:

kkitkat79 said:

Jen4948 said:
Nope. If you want to provide alcohol to your guests, you either pay for it all out of your own pocket through an open bar, or you pay for a limited selection of alcohol without making available any other alcohol.

Drink tickets are rude. So is any attempt to make guests pay for anything out of their own pockets. If you don't want to pay for alcohol, then you don't provide it. But there is nothing "creative" or polite about inviting guests to your wedding, having alcohol available, and expecting them to purchase it.

Do you even read?

All the time. Every fucking word. Thanks for the laughs.
Clearly not so much this time
BS. If you want to host something you don't use drink tickets. Even at a public bar.

*****preemptive box fix*******

In this scenario, I think the confusion is that drink tickets normally limit drinks and then its a cash bar after. In this case, she's fully hosting (not limiting anything), she's just trying to find a way where strangers aren't adding drinks to her tab.

Jen4948 · April 2015

southernbelle0915 said:

Jen4948 said:

iloveotters2014 said:

Jen4948 said:

kkitkat79 said:

Jen4948 said:
Nope. If you want to provide alcohol to your guests, you either pay for it all out of your own pocket through an open bar, or you pay for a limited selection of alcohol without making available any other alcohol.

Drink tickets are rude. So is any attempt to make guests pay for anything out of their own pockets. If you don't want to pay for alcohol, then you don't provide it. But there is nothing "creative" or polite about inviting guests to your wedding, having alcohol available, and expecting them to purchase it.

Do you even read?

All the time. Every fucking word. Thanks for the laughs.
Clearly not so much this time
BS. If you want to host something you don't use drink tickets. Even at a public bar.

*****preemptive box fix*******

In this scenario, I think the confusion is that drink tickets normally limit drinks and then its a cash bar after. In this case, she's fully hosting (not limiting anything), she's just trying to find a way where strangers aren't adding drinks to her tab.

In that instance wrist bands or something like that would work. But it might be best to not have it at a public bar where the bartenders have to distinguish between your guests and other patrons.

kkitkat79 · April 2015

Jen4948 said:

iloveotters2014 said:

Jen4948 said:

kkitkat79 said:

Jen4948 said:
Nope. If you want to provide alcohol to your guests, you either pay for it all out of your own pocket through an open bar, or you pay for a limited selection of alcohol without making available any other alcohol.

Drink tickets are rude. So is any attempt to make guests pay for anything out of their own pockets. If you don't want to pay for alcohol, then you don't provide it. But there is nothing "creative" or polite about inviting guests to your wedding, having alcohol available, and expecting them to purchase it.

Do you even read?

All the time. Every fucking word. Thanks for the laughs.
Clearly not so much this time
Asking if someone ever reads is rude. And since I do read all the time, every word, it was actually comical as well.

dd
Given that I asked "do you EVEN read" not EVER - it is very comical, but not in the way you are suggesting. To clarify, your assertion that you read every word is comical because clearly it is not the case. And I was not rude, just snarky.

japlanet · April 2015

Jen4948 said:
In that instance wrist bands or something like that would work. But it might be best to not have it at a public bar where the bartenders have to distinguish between your guests and other patrons.

Well, yes, that would be ideal, but since this is just a casual 'hey come have a drink and say hi!" thing for 2-3 hours after the rehearsal dinner, and I expect maybe 30-40 people max to show up, it seems a bit unrealistic.

Jen4948 · April 2015

Can you arrange for your after party to be in a private room or area at the bar?

[Deleted User] · April 2015

I wouldn't even worry about either drink tickets or wristbands at most of the bars I frequent. I mean, what kind of crazy nightclub-vibey place are you going to that someone else will "steal" your tab? I mean, unless the place is a total zoo, I think most bartenders know what they're doing enough to keep your party straight with other parties and with randoms that show up off the street.

Is my website wording ok?

Re: Is my website wording ok?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards