Birthday blahs.

madamerwin · April 2015

I'm turning 30 tomorrow. I have no negative feelings about being in my 30's (in fact, I think 30 sounds pretty cool), but I am in no way looking forward to my actual birthday. Maybe because it's a Tuesday, maybe because I have to work... But I feel curmudgeon-y. Everyone keeps asking me how we are going to celebrate, and my standard line has become "I don't know, I don't want to plan anything. FI is making me dinner on my birthday, but that's all we have planned."

It's actually becoming tiring telling people I am not making any grand plans. I feel like it's disappointing my family and friends.

That's all, just a little rant I guess. Does anyone else feel like birthdays are just kind of... blah?

CMGragain · April 2015

No way! I love every birthday I get! Something about having terminal cancer really lets you celebrate life!
Congratulations on your 30th birthday. Celebrate the way you want - whether quietly or noisily! Woo-hoo!

kvruns · April 2015

I always feel that way too, probably because I'm usually alone that day or if we do anything it isn't much so really it is just another day. Never been big on "its my birthday, celebrate me" anyway but I always secretly hope for those surprise plans or flowers to arrive to brighten my day

jacques27 · April 2015

So change your perspective...

"The love of my life is treating me to a wonderful homemade dinner and after that it will just be a lovely surprise. We'll see where the night takes us!"

falsara · April 2015

I feel no certain which way about Birthdays. Most of mine happen when other stuff that's more important is going on anyway.

It can be special if you want it to be though. "He's making this wonderful dinner, and then...." Do you think it would be nice to spend a quiet night at home. Maybe put on a favorite movie and relax some?

ETA: Happy Birthday!!!

littlepep · April 2015

What!? Happy Birthday! I love birthdays.

FI's aunts did that game where they ask me questions and ask him questions and then see how our answers compare. We legit both put that my favorite holiday is my birthday.

FI hates birthdays too. I think he just doesn't like being the center of attention though. Maybe that's why you don't like it?

ohannabelle · April 2015

I get that. Some years, I'm all BRING ON THE CAKE, and other years, meh. (My daughter called a few minutes ago to ask me what my birthday plans were, and I said, meh. don't really care. Just not feeling it this year.)

Sometimes, it's great just to stay home and be happy, with no big ruckus.

They should make birthday pajamas. I would love that.

Happy birthday. Have a curmudgeon themed party. Nobody's invited, and you don't have to share your cake.

climbingsingle · April 2015

I feel like there's pressure to have the.best.30th.birthday.ever.omg. I built up mine and it was a total let down. But I was also miserable in my relationship with my ex and that really soured all other aspects of my life at the time.

But I like Jacques's line of thinking. That does sound like a great birthday. Sometimes a night so laid back and chill is just perfect.

allispain · April 2015

Happy birthday! I just turned 30 myself a couple weeks ago, and I felt the same way. DH invited a few people over for a cookout, but half of them couldn't come so it was a pretty small group (we're still new-ish where we live and don't know a ton of people). I feel like everyone expects 30 to be a big birthday, but mine was really mellow. Everyone kept asking about my plans / what we did (before/after) and I too got tired of repeating that we just had a few friends over for a quiet night. I felt like the reactions I got were, "That's it?" No one actually said that, but that's how I felt they would react.

That all being said, throwing a big bash would not have been me at all. If a quiet night in with a homecooked meal makes you happy, then celebrate the fact that your FI is making you a lovely meal!!

novella1186 · April 2015

I usually feel the same way. My birthday and New Years are both always kind of bummers for me, because I feel like there's so much pressure to do something big, but the big thing is never what I want to do, so I set myself up for a let-down no matter what.

I will say, though, that this year FI took me back to the place where we first met for cocktails and dinner which was awesome, and so fun, and then he surprised me at my favorite brewery when I walked in and all my grad school friends were there. I had 0 expectations and had no problem with a low-key evening, so it was an amazing surprise and so fun!

Also killed the New Years Eve issue this year by sitting at home in our pajamas, just the two of us, and cooking tons of food. I FINALLY said "fuck expectations" and had the New Years I really wanted, and we both loved it.

I think the pressure and expectations can easily put a damper on things. So cheer up! As long as you're doing what YOU want to do (dinner with your love) then fuck everything else!

peachy13 · April 2015

Happy 30th! I hate working on my birthday, but I also feel dumb requesting it off unless it falls on a Friday or something.

FI is turning 30 this week. He's the first to turn 30 in our circle of friends and I think everyone's kind of making a big deal out of it ("oo 30!" "OMG 30!!!!") and I think he is kind of dreading it. But I'm taking him skydiving and throwing him a huge party this weekend to cheer him up.

ElcaB · April 2015

Happy Dirty 30!

Sorry you're feeling blah about your birthday. It sucks that your birthday is on a weekday + workday, but that doesn't mean it can't be fun. Having a birthday right before Christmas, I've learned sometimes you have to make it the kind of day you want.

What would make your birthday awesome? Binging on Netflix after work? Do it. Treating yourself to a mani/pedi? Do it. Ordering something you've been wanting but can't justify buying? Do it. Buy yourself flowers, ask FI to pick up your favorite bottle of wine or dessert (or both) to have with dinner, and be nice to yourself!

knottie9c5ed33df4bbd226 · April 2015

I am SUPER into birthdays, but I have a friend who couldn't care less when it's her birthday or anyone's really. I just like to celebrate! Enjoy your dinner, have some wine and maybe do something fun this weekend! I usually take my birthday off work as well, but since you're at work maybe get a little something extra special for lunch?

madamerwin · April 2015

Thanks guys. Some years I am way more into my birthday. I think it's a mix of Tuesday + work + other people's expectations ("OMG! You're THIRTY! We have to do something? What are we doing?" Etc.) making me feel underwhelmed and pressured to be more excited.

I came in to work to a fully decorated cubicle... A lot of people have turned 30 in my department in the past few years, so there's an abundance of "30" decorations. And I am meeting my sister for lunch. And eating steak and drinking nice wine for dinner. You are all right, I needed a perspective change. FI is a wonderful man who is putting lots of time and thought into a nice dinner. It will be lovely.

I actually feel a little better about it today than I did yesterday, so that's good.

Anyone remember how fun it was to go to school on your birthday as a kid? Cupcakes and balloons and stuff? I seriously always loved when my birthday was on a school day.

@novella1186 - Your New Years sounds a lot like how we usually spend it - making a bunch of food, drinking champagne, and going to bed by 1am. One year, we went snowboarding on NYE. When we got home, we took a nap and set an alarm for 8pm. FI turned it off in his sleep. We woke up at 11:45, jumped out of bed, drank some quick champagne, and were back in bed at 12:30. That's how I like to spend New Years.

ETA: FI is making me a chocolate cake with peanut butter buttercream frosting and raspberry jam. Peanut butter jelly cake.

mrscomposer · April 2015

My birthday is New Year's Day (aka, International Hangover Day). My parents were always really good about separating my birthday from Christmas, and the standard greeting still is 'happy New birthday!!! My mom has decided to love birthdays (she celebrates her birthday week), so she makes us excited for ours, also.

When I got out of birthday party age (and moved away from home), my standard New Years party was to stay alone at home, order in pizza, and watch movies by myself. I loved it. I got a whole shwack of phone calls at midnight, and then went to bed. I didn't really ever do anything the day of my birthday, but that's mostly because I'm a boring person.

Now it's more or less the same. My parents usually come to visit right around my birthday, so for my 30th, we stayed up long enough to share one of those small bottles of champagne, and then went immediately to bed. The next day was lazy, because our visits are usually about playing games, watching movies, and eating.

RussianCinderella · April 2015

If you live near a Portillos, they will email you the week of your birthday a voucher for a free slice of their delicious chocolate cake. That makes me happy.

[Deleted User] · April 2015

I feel you. I hate birthdays, and have never been one to make a huge bash out of mine. I actually agonize/get really stressed when FI or my parents want to take me out to dinner for my birthday because I can never decide where to go (that everyone else will like).

BUT! I LOVE other peoples' birthdays. When I was younger my parents were great about celebrating my birthday--never anything big, but they put up a banner (it has to be at least 24 years old now...) and we had cards and I always had ice cream cake. It just made me feel loved. I never needed to feel celebrated, but that feeling of love was always nice.

So I think it is important to replicate that kind of feeling for other people. I am happy to hear you aren't feeling as blah today, and I really hope you enjoy your birthday. It might feel like another day, but it is a very special day for the people who love you!!!

hellosweetie1015 · April 2015

tfmrserwin said:
Thanks guys. Some years I am way more into my birthday. I think it's a mix of Tuesday + work + other people's expectations ("OMG! You're THIRTY! We have to do something? What are we doing?" Etc.) making me feel underwhelmed and pressured to be more excited.

I came in to work to a fully decorated cubicle... A lot of people have turned 30 in my department in the past few years, so there's an abundance of "30" decorations. And I am meeting my sister for lunch. And eating steak and drinking nice wine for dinner. You are all right, I needed a perspective change. FI is a wonderful man who is putting lots of time and thought into a nice dinner. It will be lovely.

I actually feel a little better about it today than I did yesterday, so that's good.

Anyone remember how fun it was to go to school on your birthday as a kid? Cupcakes and balloons and stuff? I seriously always loved when my birthday was on a school day.

@novella1186 - Your New Years sounds a lot like how we usually spend it - making a bunch of food, drinking champagne, and going to bed by 1am. One year, we went snowboarding on NYE. When we got home, we took a nap and set an alarm for 8pm. FI turned it off in his sleep. We woke up at 11:45, jumped out of bed, drank some quick champagne, and were back in bed at 12:30. That's how I like to spend New Years.

ETA: FI is making me a chocolate cake with peanut butter buttercream frosting and raspberry jam. Peanut butter jelly cake.

YOU HAVE TO TELL ME HOW THIS IS BECAUSE IT IS ALL MY FAVORITE THINGS.

Happy birthday! Your birthday should be what YOU want it to be, and not what anyone else thinks it should be.

Plus. You're getting peanut butter jelly chocolate cake. How can that NOT be a happy birthday.

KatWAG · April 2015

Today is my 30th birthday. And I feel the exact same way. "curmudgeon-y" is a perfect way to explain it.

madamerwin · April 2015

KatWAG said:Today is my 30th birthday. And I feel the exact same way. "curmudgeon-y" is a perfect way to explain it.

---BOXESBOXESBOXES---

BIRTHDAY TWINS! For some reason that makes me more excited than my actual birthday. I like when people have my birthday. And we were born on the same exact day, not just the same date!

I'm glad we can be curmudgeon-y together.

abcdevonn I am totally with you on other people's birthdays. I love celebrating birthdays, just not really my own. I thoroughly enjoyed throwing my FI a 30th bash earlier this month.

hellosweetie1015 I will definitely let you know how the PBJ cake turns out. I mean, how can it go wrong?

KatWAG · April 2015

tfmrserwin said:
KatWAG said:
Today is my 30th birthday. And I feel the exact same way. "curmudgeon-y" is a perfect way to explain it.

---BOXESBOXESBOXES---

BIRTHDAY TWINS! For some reason that makes me more excited than my actual birthday. I like when people have my birthday. And we were born on the same exact day, not just the same date!

I'm glad we can be curmudgeon-y together.

abcdevonn I am totally with you on other people's birthdays. I love celebrating birthdays, just not really my own. I thoroughly enjoyed throwing my FI a 30th bash earlier this month.

hellosweetie1015 I will definitely let you know how the PBJ cake turns out. I mean, how can it go wrong?

Well it is also @charcoalandblush's (spelling?) birthday! Although I don't think she is 30.

So cheers to us! I am cracking open bottle of wine.

charcoalandblush · April 2015

KatWAG said:

tfmrserwin said:
KatWAG said:
Today is my 30th birthday. And I feel the exact same way. "curmudgeon-y" is a perfect way to explain it.

---BOXESBOXESBOXES---

BIRTHDAY TWINS! For some reason that makes me more excited than my actual birthday. I like when people have my birthday. And we were born on the same exact day, not just the same date!

I'm glad we can be curmudgeon-y together.

abcdevonn I am totally with you on other people's birthdays. I love celebrating birthdays, just not really my own. I thoroughly enjoyed throwing my FI a 30th bash earlier this month.

hellosweetie1015 I will definitely let you know how the PBJ cake turns out. I mean, how can it go wrong?

Well it is also @charcoalandblush's (spelling?) birthday! Although I don't think she is 30.

So cheers to us! I am cracking open bottle of wine.

---- stupid boxes, don't you know that i'm the birthday girl? ----

It was my birthday yesterday! Hi, birthday twins (triplets?)!!! I am not 30, but close. Posting a separate post with a b-day brag on my BFFs/bridesmaids.

madamerwin · April 2015

charcoalandblush! I just read your other post - sorry your birthday started out so awfully, but I am glad your pup is ok and that your day turned around!

hellosweetie1015 - UPDATE on the PBJ cake: IT WAS AMAZING. Chocolate cake + marionberry jam filling + peanut butter buttercream frosting = heaven. And the frosting was not too difficult to make, apparently! FI made a normal buttercream and added peanut butter (1/2 cup? 1 cup? I was trying to get the recipe out of FI, but he didn't really measure anything...). I highly recommend peanut butter frosting.

Birthday blahs.

Re: Birthday blahs.

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