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Customs and Traditions

Wedding rings

Hi, I have a question and I'd like to get some opinions. I was gifted my grandmother and great-grandmother's wedding ring (who I'm actually named after), an eternity ring with diamonds all the way around. It's a pave set ring. I've assumed since I've had it that it would be my wedding ring, and I'm thrilled to be able to wear something like that (happy coincidence, it's my size and matches my engagement ring). I don't know much about jewelry, but a co-worker brought up to me just recently that this kind of ring, with diamonds all the way around, actually loses the diamonds pretty easily on the bottom. I'm kind of hard on my ring (clumsy), and looking at how scratched the bottom of my engagement ring is, I can see what she means. 

I would absolutely love to wear this band all the time, as it means a lot to have her ring, but I'm worried I'll constantly be knocking the diamonds loose. Is this a valid concern? Would it be a feasible compromise to just buy a plain band, have both of the rings blessed at the wedding ceremony, and then wear the plain band for normal wear, and my great-grandmother's ring for dressing up/special occasions/when I know I'm not going to be doing things with my hands that could be hard on the ring? Or would it be enough to just try and be careful with the eternity band? If anyone has experience with this type of ring, I'd love to know what you thing. Thanks!

Re: Wedding rings

  • It might be possible for a jeweler to basically cut the ring in half and replace the bottom half with a plain band. Or you could have a new ring made with some of the eternity ring's diamonds put on the top (this might be necessary anyway due to the ring's age--are the diamonds secure?).

    Either way, I don't think you should have two wedding rings blessed. Plenty of people switch out the rings they wear as a wedding band.
  • I think I would be REALLY uncomfortable in cutting up the ring that belonged to them. And my excitement in the ring stems from the fact that I get to wear the same ring they both wore. Additionally, I imagine something like that would be extremely expensive to do, as opposed to buying a plain band. The diamonds themselves seem to be secure, but that's just from my inspection of the ring, not a professional opinion.  
  • In that case I would wear the heirloom ring at your wedding and on special occasions and wear a simple band as an "everyday" wedding band. My mom does that. 

    You also might want to take it to a jeweler and ask for his/her opinion on whether you even need to worry about damaging the bottom. 
    larrygagaTrumpetandhorn
  • I have an eternity band, both as a setting in my engagement ring (pave) and my wedding band (prong set). I have yet to knock a diamond out of either band. I work out with them on, travel with them on, and wear them every day to work. I do not sleep with them on or shower with them on.

    I also had eternity rings during my first marriage. Again, no issues. However, I did have a plain band blessed during the ceremony because I used to work a lot with my hands. I almost never wore it, though. 

     







  • I have heard about the same issues as you, so I'd be leary myself.

    I've had to get the prongs of the centre stone of my engagement ring re-tightened as my stone got loose after 2 years of wearing it (probably banged it on something). I used my hands a lot at work, have a horse (so chores at the barn), and participate in sports, which is partially why I got a plain band (and I no longer wear my e-ring at these times) because I was worried about loosing stones, or having prongs getting caught on things.

    I think having a plain band for daily use and your grandmothers' ring for special occasions is just fine. I know of a few people who have different rings. 
  • emmaaaemmaaa North Carolina mod
    Moderator 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    With the pave setting, I don't think it is AS RISKY for diamonds coming out. If that's the ring that is special to you, you could wear it and always replace the diamonds if they fall out.

  • I would take it to a jeweler and have them make sure the prongs are all sturdy and the diamonds are secure, if they are I'm sure it will be fine.
  • I was hesitant about taking it to a jeweler for their opinion, thinking they'd be inclined to try and steer me to buy something new and tell me that my ring was risky, but I guess that it would be a good data point to have still.
  • I've taken two antique rings to jewelers to be resized, and neither time did they try to get me to buy a new ring or have work done on it. Check yelp reviews before you go. If it's a reputable jeweler you'll be fine. :)
  • Since it has such sentimental value to you I would probably go with an everyday simple band & keep that one for going out. My sister is a nurse & can't wear her engagement ring which is also her wedding band to work. So she has a simple plain band for everyday & she wears her good ring on the weekends or going out.
  • Just popped into my head, another idea, what about placing it on a chain to wear it as a pendant on a day to day basis but then since it's not altered, you can still wear it as a ring when you go out.

  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its

    You should bring your grandmother's ring to your jeweler for an opinion. A reputable jeweler won't try to talk you out of enjoying the ring if it's safe to do so.

    I think it's a great idea to buy a simple band and have them both blessed.

                       
  • So I did end up taking it to a jewelry store over weekend. The lady that helped was extremely nice, she took a look at it for me while my fiance was getting sized for his ring. It is a platinum ring, and she told me that would be pretty durable. She even had an eternity ring that she has been wearing for years and has never lost a diamond out of it. There is one diamond in my ring that has been chipped over the years and years of wear that I never noticed before, and I'll likely lose that one eventually, but other than that it looks to be pretty sturdy! So I think I'll take my chances and wear the family ring, just keep an eye out for any problems down the road, and hopefully be able to pass it down in our future family.
    emmaaarcher912SP29adwks
  • emmaaaemmaaa North Carolina mod
    Moderator 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    So I did end up taking it to a jewelry store over weekend. The lady that helped was extremely nice, she took a look at it for me while my fiance was getting sized for his ring. It is a platinum ring, and she told me that would be pretty durable. She even had an eternity ring that she has been wearing for years and has never lost a diamond out of it. There is one diamond in my ring that has been chipped over the years and years of wear that I never noticed before, and I'll likely lose that one eventually, but other than that it looks to be pretty sturdy! So I think I'll take my chances and wear the family ring, just keep an eye out for any problems down the road, and hopefully be able to pass it down in our future family.
    That's great! I know you are glad that you will be able to wear it. I hope it lasts for a very long time. Just get it inspected regularly. 

    SP29
  • edited February 2015
    Another thing to keep in mind, with the ring being pave all the way around, is that there isn't really a "bottom." The ring will twist and turn around your finger and get wear everywhere, not just in one place like an e-ring with a center stone that is always on top with a defined bottom. I think as long as you are adamant about regular inspections with a reputable jeweler (which will tighten prongs if they get loose so you don't lose a stone) and get good insurance, you'll be fine.

  • In that case I would wear the heirloom ring at your wedding and on special occasions and wear a simple band as an "everyday" wedding band. My mom does that. 

    You also might want to take it to a jeweler and ask for his/her opinion on whether you even need to worry about damaging the bottom. 
    This is exactly what I was going to say... Take it into a jewelry store (many will do free inspections and cleanings), and ask their jeweler or repair person to take a good look at it. Tell them your concerns, and they should be able to tell you if the settings are secure or if you have anything to worry about. Also ditto @sj613, get it insured if you have not already.

    I will say that I work for a jewelry company, and it is very true that stones on eternity bands fall out more easily than stones on other types of rings, but that is not to say that yours will fall out. That said, I would do what @apromise22 suggested and have a simple band that you can wear on a daily basis, and reserve the heirloom band for special occasions.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • I agree with  @apromise22 to use something different. Some have the same issues with the placement of the diamond what they did was to make the jeweler see to it that it does not fall in any circumstances but to be more cautious better not to where it anywhere 
  • larrygagalarrygaga Czechoslovakia member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer

    In that case I would wear the heirloom ring at your wedding and on special occasions and wear a simple band as an "everyday" wedding band. My mom does that. 


    You also might want to take it to a jeweler and ask for his/her opinion on whether you even need to worry about damaging the bottom. 
    I think this is your best bet.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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