Honey, I love you, but no.

JennyColada · April 2015

So one of my friends just started a...bum da BUMMMMM

GoFundMe.

She got into USC for a Master's program that she's been wanting to do for forever, and she needs $9000 to take some pre-reqs that she was unable to take/pay for due to various medical issues (she hurt her back at work and has been paying for/dealing with that). She's not yet eligible for financial aid since she's not yet a student.

Only I know more: She's going to Europe (leaving tomorrow) and just got a new credit card. As far as I'm concerned, she should be applying for personal loans, and then she can pay them off later on. I mean, that's what REGULAR, NORMAL, and RESPONSIBLE people do when they're in a pinch financially.

Sorry hun. Love you, but no.

luckya23 · April 2015

I feel like people must get the message when nobody donates...

Of course that hasn't stopped my one FB friend, but one has to be pretty clueless!

julieanne912 · April 2015

Ugh, GoFundMe's are the worst. This past 2 weeks I've seen one acquaintance start a GoFundMe for "rent".... ie her and her loser BF have been living with her parents, and she's got one kid and another on the way, so instead of him getting a better job or her getting a job at all, they're asking complete strangers to help them.

Saw another one along the same lines, only this one was to raise money for a down payment for a house.... another situation where the husband works but the wife doesn't. It's like sorry, it's awesome you chose to stay at home to raise your family, but that doesn't mean asking complete strangers for cash to support your life choices.

flyingfoxes · April 2015

My coworker's DIL started a GoFundMe early last year to try and raise money for her and coworker's son to go to Greece for their honeymoon because it was a "dream trip". Coworker was mortified when she found out. They got married last June....and are getting divorced now. Luckily nobody donated and they took that shit down pretty quick.

Cookie Pusher · April 2015

sal2015 · April 2015

Someone I knew from high school recently started a GoFundMe to pay for his emergency root canal because "dental work is expensive." Yes, dental work is expensive, but grown ups pay for their own dental work. He posted it repeatedly on facebook and as I was rolling my eyes, several people donated to the tune of several hundred dollars. Ugh. He made sure to post on facebook after the root canal to tell everyone that it was all paid off.

ETF typo.

larrygaga · April 2015

FiancB · April 2015

I saw a poster at school advertising one for MY FIRST MISSION TRIP. Grossssss. I want to paste something on top of it but haven't decided what.

themuffinman16 · April 2015

JennyColada said:
So one of my friends just started a...bum da BUMMMMM
GoFundMe.
She got into USC for a Master's program that she's been wanting to do for forever, and she needs $9000 to take some pre-reqs that she was unable to take/pay for due to various medical issues (she hurt her back at work and has been paying for/dealing with that). She's not yet eligible for financial aid since she's not yet a student.
Only I know more: She's going to Europe (leaving tomorrow) and just got a new credit card. As far as I'm concerned, she should be applying for personal loans, and then she can pay them off later on. I mean, that's what REGULAR, NORMAL, and RESPONSIBLE people do when they're in a pinch financially.
Sorry hun. Love you, but no.

My mind immediately read UFC. I was thinking, "Oh shit. " I imagined someone in a full body cast marking their circle of terror. Then I reread it, and your post does say USC. Is it bad that I am a little disappointed... that would have been a hilarious story for a GFM.

LondonLisa · April 2015

Why can't said prerequisites be taken at a community college? I have a friend who did a Masters in the US (she was American, but went to uni with me). She said she took classes at a local CC for like $100 a course or something ridiculously cheap, which promptly made us all frustrated at how much we spent at our university when we could have knocked those out of the way early haha.

Frankly, with how generous universities in the US are with financial aid (grants/loans etc), I find it dodgier than a 4 day old curry that this university won't give her any help.

I'd have a hard time not responding "I would give you money, but my spare change is going towards paying off my student loans from when I was in postgrad, you know, like an adult"

kvruns · April 2015

LondonLisa said:
Why can't said prerequisites be taken at a community college? I have a friend who did a Masters in the US (she was American, but went to uni with me). She said she took classes at a local CC for like $100 a course or something ridiculously cheap, which promptly made us all frustrated at how much we spent at our university when we could have knocked those out of the way early haha.

Frankly, with how generous universities in the US are with financial aid (grants/loans etc), I find it dodgier than a 4 day old curry that this university won't give her any help.

I'd have a hard time not responding "I would give you money, but my spare change is going towards paying off my student loans from when I was in postgrad, you know, like an adult"

that comment made me laugh! But then it also made me think. Saying she can't get financial aid because she's not yet a student doesn't really make sense. If she needs the $9K for the pre-reqs before even starting at USC then she could apply for student loans to cover the classes wherever she is taking them - ie where she will be a student while she takes those classes.

jenna8984 · April 2015

kvruns said:

LondonLisa said:
Why can't said prerequisites be taken at a community college? I have a friend who did a Masters in the US (she was American, but went to uni with me). She said she took classes at a local CC for like $100 a course or something ridiculously cheap, which promptly made us all frustrated at how much we spent at our university when we could have knocked those out of the way early haha.

Frankly, with how generous universities in the US are with financial aid (grants/loans etc), I find it dodgier than a 4 day old curry that this university won't give her any help.

I'd have a hard time not responding "I would give you money, but my spare change is going towards paying off my student loans from when I was in postgrad, you know, like an adult"
that comment made me laugh! But then it also made me think. Saying she can't get financial aid because she's not yet a student doesn't really make sense. If she needs the $9K for the pre-reqs before even starting at USC then she could apply for student loans to cover the classes wherever she is taking them - ie where she will be a student while she takes those classes.

hahah I also love how the Brits say dodgy- I don't think I've ever used that word.

jenna8984 · April 2015

I honestly don't even know what's worse- the GFM's clogging up my newfeed- or the 18 people selling shit. Between Mary Kay, sex toys, body wraps, herbalife, Jamberry, god knows what else. NO. I don't want to donate money to you and I also don't want to buy your stupid bullshit products or host a party asking other people to buy your stupid bullshit products. You are not a "#bossbitch #entrepreneur" because you swindle dumbasses into buying weight loss shakes.

KatWAG · April 2015

My favorite GFM story was from a guy I went to college with. He and his wife were moving to California and his birthday was coming up. The wife thought that since they now live in CA and it was her H's birthday she should start a GFM for a surfboard ($800) to give to her H for his big day.

The only person to contribute was the wife, and 2 family members.

JennyColada · April 2015

KatWAG said:
The only person to contribute was the wife, and 2 family members.

As it should be!

KatieinBkln · May 2015

Some people very close to me just started a gfm for their dog, who needs surgery. It costs $1200. I love them, I love their dog, but I can't help thinking...you can't scrape together $1200? Not even on a credit card?

If that's the case, it makes me really sad. But I somehow doubt that's the case. (I'm a jerk.)

sophhabobopha · May 2015

ChemFanatic25 · May 2015

kvruns said:

LondonLisa said:
Why can't said prerequisites be taken at a community college? I have a friend who did a Masters in the US (she was American, but went to uni with me). She said she took classes at a local CC for like $100 a course or something ridiculously cheap, which promptly made us all frustrated at how much we spent at our university when we could have knocked those out of the way early haha.

Frankly, with how generous universities in the US are with financial aid (grants/loans etc), I find it dodgier than a 4 day old curry that this university won't give her any help.

I'd have a hard time not responding "I would give you money, but my spare change is going towards paying off my student loans from when I was in postgrad, you know, like an adult"
that comment made me laugh! But then it also made me think. Saying she can't get financial aid because she's not yet a student doesn't really make sense. If she needs the $9K for the pre-reqs before even starting at USC then she could apply for student loans to cover the classes wherever she is taking them - ie where she will be a student while she takes those classes.

I thought you don't normally get financial aid if you're not a full time student? Also Community colleges are not $100/class cheap but they most definitely are cheap (maybe around $400-$1000 depending on where you go) and there are a lot of great community colleges out there. She should just pull out a loan if she can't scrape together $9,000. It's what many students do. I wonder what kind of masters she will be going for. Some offer way more financial aid/scholarships/grants than others. If she doesn't get a full ride is she putting together a GFM for that as well? Bleh!

melbenso · May 2015

kvruns said:

LondonLisa said:
Why can't said prerequisites be taken at a community college? I have a friend who did a Masters in the US (she was American, but went to uni with me). She said she took classes at a local CC for like $100 a course or something ridiculously cheap, which promptly made us all frustrated at how much we spent at our university when we could have knocked those out of the way early haha.

Frankly, with how generous universities in the US are with financial aid (grants/loans etc), I find it dodgier than a 4 day old curry that this university won't give her any help.

I'd have a hard time not responding "I would give you money, but my spare change is going towards paying off my student loans from when I was in postgrad, you know, like an adult"
that comment made me laugh! But then it also made me think. Saying she can't get financial aid because she's not yet a student doesn't really make sense. If she needs the $9K for the pre-reqs before even starting at USC then she could apply for student loans to cover the classes wherever she is taking them - ie where she will be a student while she takes those classes.

The thing I find even stranger is that she is saying she got into a graduate program without meeting the prerequisites to be in that program. It's been 15 years since I applied to grad schools, but I'm not aware of any that will admit you to the program if you haven't first completed all required prerequisites.

allispain · May 2015

melbenso

Love the siggy. Why hello Captain Malcolm Reynolds.

FiancB · May 2015

KatieinBkln said:
Some people very close to me just started a gfm for their dog, who needs surgery. It costs $1200. I love them, I love their dog, but I can't help thinking...you can't scrape together $1200? Not even on a credit card?

If that's the case, it makes me really sad. But I somehow doubt that's the case. (I'm a jerk.)

Care Credit is awesome.

And you generally can get financial aid when part time if over a certain number of credits. I believe 6-12 is considered part time and does receive financial aid, just obviously not as much as full time. I was only part time for most of the time I was taking prerequisites for nursing school, because of when the classes were offered and because I already have a BS so I didn't need writing and biology and stuff like that.

ShesSoCold · May 2015

KatieinBkln said:
Some people very close to me just started a gfm for their dog, who needs surgery. It costs $1200. I love them, I love their dog, but I can't help thinking...you can't scrape together $1200? Not even on a credit card?

If that's the case, it makes me really sad. But I somehow doubt that's the case. (I'm a jerk.)

My friend did the same thing. About the same amount. And posted the link directly on my FB wall because "I understand the need". Bitch it took me four years to pay off the $7,000 care credit that we took out for my dog's surgeries. You can suck my ass if you think I'mma donate to you.

hellosweetie1015 · May 2015

So. I just saw my first GFM Facebook post.

And I feel super judgey and not good about myself because of the thoughts I'm having. But.

Guys, am I terrible if I think that this person who I've seen consistently USE her various diagnoses to be lazy is just again using her diagnoses? Like, for instance, she's got something akin to fibromyalgia. It's debilitatingly painful, from what I hear from all sources. I lived with her for a year while she was going through getting this diagnosis. And... there were days where she was visibly affected and stayed home. And there were days where she seemed, to me, 100% fine, "went to the dog park with our other roommate's dogs just because she wanted to" fine, but she used her diagnosis to get excuses from work and school. And... there were days when she used little things that I'd just power through (sore throats and things) to stay home and goof off. She used them to postpone tests, and explain away absence-related failures and stuff. I just... I don't believe her all the time anymore. Am I as terrible a person as this makes me feel?

KatieinBkln · May 2015

hellosweetie1015 said:
So. I just saw my first GFM Facebook post.

And I feel super judgey and not good about myself because of the thoughts I'm having. But.

Guys, am I terrible if I think that this person who I've seen consistently USE her various diagnoses to be lazy is just again using her diagnoses? Like, for instance, she's got something akin to fibromyalgia. It's debilitatingly painful, from what I hear from all sources. I lived with her for a year while she was going through getting this diagnosis. And... there were days where she was visibly affected and stayed home. And there were days where she seemed, to me, 100% fine, "went to the dog park with our other roommate's dogs just because she wanted to" fine, but she used her diagnosis to get excuses from work and school. And... there were days when she used little things that I'd just power through (sore throats and things) to stay home and goof off. She used them to postpone tests, and explain away absence-related failures and stuff. I just... I don't believe her all the time anymore. Am I as terrible a person as this makes me feel?

Not terrible. While it's trie we can't know what's going in with another person , or whether they're just hiding their pain well, etc., I think it's true that certain people with whatever type of difficulty or disability use it to avoid stuff.

Honey, I love you, but no.

Re: Honey, I love you, but no.

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