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Wedding Invitations & Paper

Inner/outer envelopes, necessary or optional?

I feel like its kind of a waste of paper, and will add expense to calligrapher and postage. My mother insists that this is what's "done". Who is right here? I feel like I rarely get invitations with outer envelopes, but I honestly can't remember. (which may answer my own question, since its obviously a forgettable thing). Thoughts?


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Re: Inner/outer envelopes, necessary or optional?

  • I think of this as a fanciness issue.  If you're having a calligrapher, you probably want to have both inner and outer envelopes.  I'm having a casual wedding and will likely only have one envelope.  The whole dual envelope thing started back when rich folk had people to open their dirty, smudged by the Pony Express man's fingers.  Then the rich folk got handed the pristine inner envelope by the butler, probably presented on a silver tray.  I think of it more as a 'tradition' than a must-have.  Up to you.
  • It is traditional, but it also serves a purpose to have a place to specifically list who is invited. In a family, only the parents would be on the outer envelope but the children (if invited) would be listed on the inner envelope. This helps clarify who is actually invited. If the children aren't on the inner envelope, then they aren't invited.
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited May 2015
    Ditto what ILoveBeachMusic wrote.  20 years ago, it was standard practice.  Today, it is optional, but it is very handy when inviting families.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Thank you! I didn't know about the family thing, I just thought you addressed "Mr and Mrs Smith and family" if you wanted to include children, but that makes more sense.



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  • Thank you! I didn't know about the family thing, I just thought you addressed "Mr and Mrs Smith and family" if you wanted to include children, but that makes more sense.

    The problem with the "And Family" line is what if Grandma lives with them, is she invited too?  What about step kids who live with the family part time, have they been included in your count?
  •  thanks all! I think we are going to do outer envelope just because it is black tie and with calligraphy and everything, it seems appropriate.


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  • I'm just doing an outer envelope and writing all the people invited for that invitation on the envelope (I may create a spot on the invite itself for the names of the invited to double the chances of people getting it right). I just can't handle the waste that a second envelope creates. It's also why we're not going with mailed RSVP cards. Online or phone RSVPs (if they can't handle online) to cut down on wasted resources and expenses.
  •  thanks all! I think we are going to do outer envelope just because it is black tie and with calligraphy and everything, it seems appropriate.

    Is it really black tie?  That means evening ceremony, plated dinner, live band, top shelf liquor with open bar, the works.  All your guests should wear gowns/tuxedos.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • CMGragain said:

     thanks all! I think we are going to do outer envelope just because it is black tie and with calligraphy and everything, it seems appropriate.

    Is it really black tie?  That means evening ceremony, plated dinner, live band, top shelf liquor with open bar, the works.  All your guests should wear gowns/tuxedos.
    Does it matter to you if it is? Or are you looking for another board to chastise people's etiquette or lack thereof.

    Yes, all of the above. But thanks. 


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