Should I invite my daughter's family?

Re: Should I invite my daughter's family?

• littlepep member

  

  May 2015

  I think this is a conversation you and your FI need to have. I think it's totally reasonable for you to invite them if that's what you want to do, but yall to have a discussion about his being uncomfortable with it. I find it weird that he's upset about people who are family to and supportive of your daughter (his soon to be SD).

  

  
  

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• southernbelle0915 mod

  

  May 2015

  If you are close enough to these people to consider them family, I think your FI needs to support your relationship with them. It shouldn't matter if they're blood related, great friends, or whatever - you consider them family and that's that.

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• TrixieJess member

  

  May 2015

  My father passed away 7 years ago. I'm still close to my step-mother and her family, as well as her new husband, they are family. They only "blood" relation is my brother. If you feel close to them, your daughter is close to them and you would like them to be a part of your wedding, you and your FI need to have a serious discussion. This is not about your ex, it's about people who you care deeply about and who have a connection to you and your daughter and who are not going anywhere after you are married.

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• saric83 member

  

  May 2015

  Why is your FI on the fence?  Just because his family might be upset (which IMO is ridiculous), or other reasons?

  
  

  My family was invited to my niece's mom's wedding (similar situation where my brother isn't in the picture).  We would have totally understood not being invited for space or budget reasons, but I definitely would have been disappointed a bit because she IS family who we spend a lot of time with. 

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  May 2015

  Thanks for the replies! 

  
  

  It sounds like y'all are on the same page I am. I think the bad taste every one has in their mouths over my ex is spilling over to his family...but they can not control the actions of an adult (boy) man unfortunately! I also don't want to harm the relationship I've worked so hard to cultivate.

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• SP29 member

  

  May 2015 edited May 2015

  I think that is really awesome that you are close to your daughter's family. I would invite them, if you want them there, because they are supportive people to you and your daughter.

  
  

  Of course you should talk to your FI first, but I think he needs to understand that this has nothing to do with your ex (it's not like you're inviting him!) and these are people who are important to you because they have always supported you and they continue to support your daughter (and your FI's soon to be step daughter!). FI's family needs to get over that jealousy. 

  
  

  My parents had an amicable divorce. My grandma (dad's mom) still considers my mom her daughter in law, as she says she will always be the mother of her grandchildren. My mom doesn't have her parents around anymore and isn't very close with her side of the family. My mom doesn't come to big family events on my dad's side anymore, unless it directly involves us kids, because my dad has a new significant other, but my mom still goes and visits my grandparents on her own. 

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• Jen4948 member

  

  May 2015

  It sounds yo me like you need to explain to your FI that while you appreciate why your ex should not be present, his family members supported you and your daughter during and after your breakup and they remain important people in your lives who should not be thrown aside simply because you are marrying him, and you don't love him less because they have been there for you.

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