My sister and I have always had a difference of opinion on many things. We don't see eye-to-eye on anything and we bicker and argue a lot. She always takes things too far and says really mean, horrible things when she is angry. I love my sister with all my heart and I know that she loves me, but sometimes we don't LIKE each other.
When I got engaged over Thanksgiving, both my Mom and her pressured me to ask her to be my Maid of Honor. Knowing she had zero wedding experience, lived across the country, and was going through a transitional period in her life (new job, boyfriend, move), I had a long discussion with her about what I would need from her and what being a Maid of Honor meant to me before I asked her. So she was well aware of what her duties would be. Against my better judgement, I let my Mom talk me into asking her to be my MOH.
A few weeks ago, she started arguing with me about anything wedding related and started telling me how selfish and self-centered I was. She claimed that I was only interested in having a huge expensive "Kardashian" wedding, which isn't true at all. She has also made the bridesmaid dress shopping experience horrible and caused a huge fight between the bridesmaids over dresses because everything we "picked" was not her style, when the discussion was only to get ideas of what everyone liked. She has also claimed that I am making everything about me (shocker! last time i checked it was MY wedding), and that I am being overly sensitive for getting upset by her actions.
I'm frankly worried that she is going to ruin my wedding day by getting angry over something and saying really mean, nasty things to me that make me cry. I DO NOT want to deal with that on a day that is supposed to be about the love between myself and my fiance. Both him and I are feeling very unsupported by her and I have made the decision that I can't have someone be my maid of honor who makes me feel bad all the time and turns every wedding-related thing a drama fest.
I still would obviously want my sister AT my wedding, but I am questioning even keeping her IN my wedding, let alone having her as my maid of honor when my other bridesmaids are SO much more supportive and graceful about putting up with her BS. I'm just not sure how to approach her about it, since it's obviously a sensitive topic. Any advice is appreciated.