B Listing

[Deleted User] · May 2015

I was at the dentist this weekend and a new hygienist joined the staff and was working on me.

She saw my e-ring and asked if I was engaged and I said yes and she mentioned she was getting married this fall too.

Thankfully she had her hand half in my mouth when she told me she was sending invites early because she was B listing, so I couldn't do my Stephanie Tanner "HOW RUDE!" impression.

[Deleted User] · May 2015

I overheard a woman in the elevator this morning complaining that she was having "trouble" with a bridesmaid not living up to her duties or helping in pre-wedding events, and that she wished she didn't have a wedding party at all.

Her friend reacted like not having a bridal party is an abomination and insisted you HAVE to have at least ONE bridesmaid/MOH (because you know, duties, photos and even sides).

People...

jacques27 · May 2015

With the way people have been going BSC here the last couple of weeks, I was almost certain when I saw the title that this was going to be a post of righteous indignation about why they are so damn special and B-listing is ok.

I have decided that from here on out, I will only be posting variations of Constance Wu saying "Awww, hell no!" on the Etiquette board.

littlepep · May 2015

A girl this week told me she demanded her bridal party relocate her bachelorette even though they said it was out of their budget. She was like I was kind of a bridezilla. I was like well at least you know that? I guess?

luckya23 · May 2015

My friend said something to me this morning about "obviously having an A list and B list"

I was like yeah, there are the people I wanted to come, and the 150 our parents invited!

I did end up sending one round of invitations 10 days after the first, but that was mostly just address issues

(and 8 more I didn't realize his parents wanted to invite)

luckya23 · May 2015

FeeleyToBe said:
I was at the dentist this weekend and a new hygienist joined the staff and was working on me.

She saw my e-ring and asked if I was engaged and I said yes and she mentioned she was getting married this fall too.

Thankfully she had her hand half in my mouth when she told me she was sending invites early because she was B listing, so I couldn't do my Stephanie Tanner "HOW RUDE!" impression.

Would you actually tell her though? I feel so weird telling people they are being so rude... like when MIL invited her SIL to my shower this weekend without even letting the hosts know...

yogapants · May 2015

I don't know how to tell people they're being rude. Like the friends who don't want to invite one guy's girlfriend because they "don't think it'll last". Well, it's lasted 9 months so far and they stayed together even after he moved to the opposite coast for a job opportunity. I actually did speak up about this but they didn't budge. This couple will be together for just under a year by the time invites go out, so hopefully they'll come to their senses.

redheadbride15 · May 2015

Earlier this year when I was starting my guestlist I noticed that TK's guestlist manager has an "A" vs. "B" option and I naturally assumed this was a tool you could use to group your guests for seating arrangements, etc. (like bride's side vs. groom's side), but then I noticed that there was also another tool to group your guests into bride's family, bride's friends, groom's family, groom's friends. It was only after this that I learned what "B-listing" even was, because quite frankly it never crossed my mind that anyone would think to do this. I didn't even need to lurk on the etiquette boards to know that this would be a terrible idea.

Shame on you, TK!

LabLove86 · May 2015

This weekend I was talking to one of my bridesmaids about the guest list and how we are going to have to cut a few people to meet our venues maximum. Her response was "Well - just send out more invites as you get declines! Then you can invite everyone" My response was just:

chloe97 · May 2015

We left 2 of my FMILs girlfriends off our list because we literally hit our max and quite honestly neither of us know the women. She never specifically asked us to invite them, but has been hinting profusely that we send them an invitation if we get enough RSVP no's. She's already sworn to me that "they understand and wouldn't be offended to be B-listed."

Yeah and they would understand there is not enough room to invite them!

larrygaga · May 2015

The salon where I had my trial hair done has like 3 stylists who are all getting married this year. Naturally between their hair cuts (slow day?) they all stood around, watched me get my hair done and we were talking about weddings. It was fun. However, I opened my big stupid mouth and insulted a nearby barn that Ive been to a wedding to before. I thought it was ugly and there are way cuter barns out there. It was one of the stylists venues.......oops.

Thank god she's not the one doing my hair, lol.

[Deleted User] · May 2015

luckya23 said:

FeeleyToBe said:
I was at the dentist this weekend and a new hygienist joined the staff and was working on me.

She saw my e-ring and asked if I was engaged and I said yes and she mentioned she was getting married this fall too.

Thankfully she had her hand half in my mouth when she told me she was sending invites early because she was B listing, so I couldn't do my Stephanie Tanner "HOW RUDE!" impression.
Would you actually tell her though? I feel so weird telling people they are being so rude... like when MIL invited her SIL to my shower this weekend without even letting the hosts know...

Well, I would have probably said, "oh... you're doing that?" with a slightly snarky look on my face.

If it were a friend I might try to say something and explain why.

I was at a coffee shop once and heard a girl telling someone about her cash bar (dude said he'd be bringing his own flask- zing!) and I was very tempted to leave a note for her as I left that had The Knot E board listed.

LadyMillil · May 2015

Ugh. My friends went to look at venues recently and realized how much everything will cost for an evening reception. They have decided to do a cash bar, but wedding party drinks for free. I'm a BM but DH isn't in the wedding. I didn't tell them it was a bad idea, but I did say that I would just order a bunch of drinks for me and give some to DH.

thisismynickname2 · May 2015

I could not correct strangers in the heat of the moment. My awkward silence would have to be it.

For friends, I've tried to be polite about it. My one friend over-invited and was thinking about just not having enough chairs. "A cocktail reception! The venue says they do it all the time!" I was all, "But... that's a long time on your feet. People stake out chairs and don't leave. People will just leave the party early." Apparently her FFIL threw a fit about chairs, and now they'll have enough chairs. Phew.

peachy13 · May 2015

One of my mother's friend's daughter is getting married this summer and my mom is attending along with some other friends in their circle... except for one lady (Phyllis) who is kind of in and out of their group of friends. So my mom, MOB, some other of their friends, and Phyllis all meet up on a whim last week. MOB tells my mom and other friends beforehand "don't talk about the wedding to Phyllis, she's a B-lister."

badbnagdway · May 2015

I successfully, but gently, talked my FI out of b-listing a co-worker. He had invited a lot of work people (everyone on his floor at work) and said after invitations he had gotten more friendly with another dude in another department. A week before the wedding he asked if he could invite him. All I said was, "so, I'm going to leave this up to you, but I do think that he may end up feeling slighted that he got an invitation only because we had room for him". I did say that if it was someone that was hired recently (like, since invites went out) it might be different. He said the guy had worked there a long time and that I had a good point and decided not to give him a last minute invite.

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