Response Card/RSVP HELP!!!

Re: Response Card/RSVP HELP!!!

• MyNameIsNot member

  

  May 2015

  n&a2015 said:

  Our wedding is August 15th and both of our families will have to travel, therefore I am about to send out our invites giving 12 weeks for people to make travel plans. Now in my final steps I am struggling to come up with an appropriate date to have the response cards returned. I know playing it safe for most people would be 4 weeks from the wedding giving 2-3 weeks before final head count it due. I think we need closer to 8 weeks to plan because our situation is a little sticky. My fiancé's family does not understand RSVP or response cards of any kind. When they have weddings they send an invite to the head of the family and then assume everyone under that person is coming and bringing their friends... ending up with 500+, they think! Well, we are having a sit-down dinner and need a final head count. So any suggestions on how long I should give them to respond before we know we should start contacting them? (I was thinking giving them 3 or 4 weeks to respond from when I send out the invitations.) PLEASE HELP!

  It's rude to ask people to RSVP more than a month in advance. Plus, with RSVPs that early, you can be sure that you'll have a ton of people changing their response later, creating more problems for yourself. 

  
  

  Put your RSVP date 4 weeks before the wedding. Then after the date expires, start calling people who haven't RSVPed. It doesn't take that long. 

  
  

  In the meantime, start collecting phone numbers for everyone on the guest list so that making those calls can move quickly. It doesn't take more than a few minutes to make each call. Even if you have to call 50 families, it can be done in an afternoon. 

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  May 2015

  n&a2015 said:

  Our wedding is August 15th and both of our families will have to travel, therefore I am about to send out our invites giving 12 weeks for people to make travel plans. Now in my final steps I am struggling to come up with an appropriate date to have the response cards returned. I know playing it safe for most people would be 4 weeks from the wedding giving 2-3 weeks before final head count it due. I think we need closer to 8 weeks to plan because our situation is a little sticky. My fiancé's family does not understand RSVP or response cards of any kind. When they have weddings they send an invite to the head of the family and then assume everyone under that person is coming and bringing their friends... ending up with 500+, they think! Well, we are having a sit-down dinner and need a final head count. So any suggestions on how long I should give them to respond before we know we should start contacting them? (I was thinking giving them 3 or 4 weeks to respond from when I send out the invitations.) PLEASE HELP!

  Don't send invitations so early.  Call people and let them know that they should start making travel plans.  Tell them your invitations will go out in the mail 8 weeks before your wedding, but they should be looking out for travel deals.

  
  

  Address invitations to the people invited; i.e. David and Nancy Jones.  If uncle David thinks that means his 8 children are also invited, you'll have to call him and explain to him the error of his ways.  Or, actually, your Fiance will since uncle David is his family.

  
  

  Find out when your caterer needs final numbers and your RSVP date is a week to 10 days before that.  So, if your caterer needs numbers a week before your event, your RSVP date is a week before that.  That gives you and your fiance a week to call people to tell them you didn't get their RSVP and you need to know how many to expect so you can tell your caterer and they have food to eat.

  
  

  Don't concede to the lowest common denominator.  Just because you have family members who don't understand RSVPs doesn't mean you should demean all your guests by catering to them only.  Most people know that they have to inform the hosts if they'll be attending.  Most people know how to make travel plans with 8 weeks notice.

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