Chit Chat

UPDATE: XP: Yes, You Will Be Side-Eyed

ohmrs2014ohmrs2014 Dirty Jerz mod
Moderator 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
edited May 2015 in Chit Chat
I posted this on the Etquitte board, but thought I would post here as well since CC gets a lot more traffic.

So my mother received a bridal shower invite during the week for her cousin's future DIL and when I went to visit she showed it to me.  Here I was thinking she was just going to need my help purchasing something off of the registry online (my parents aren't savvy when it comes to online shopping).

Instead, she went on to say how they were registered at blueprintregistry and she couldn't believe the items on there.  They were registered for airfare tickets and items for their honeymoon.  The kicker (according to my mom) was that she was registered for her veil.

My mom called her cousin and asked what this was and her cousin went on a tirade apparently about how she didn't even agree with their registry.  

My dad then entered the conversation and said he had never been so appalled by something in his entire life.  They both agreed that they would be giving either a physical gift or money at the shower.

Now my parents are very laid back and easy going people who hardly complain about what others do, they just go with the flow, and if by chance they don't agree with someone else's ideas, they don't usually make a big fuss.  

For my parents to make a big fuss about this, says a lot.

Just remember, when you think your family won't say anything about these types of registries, they may not say it to your face, but they will complain about it.




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Re: UPDATE: XP: Yes, You Will Be Side-Eyed

  • kvrunskvruns member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    registering for your veil?? so if no one buys it for the shower will she not have one?  wtf  
  • emmaaaemmaaa North Carolina mod
    Moderator 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    Wow, registering for her veil! That is the kicker for me too.

  • kvruns said:
    registering for your veil?? so if no one buys it for the shower will she not have one?  wtf  

    emmaaa said:
    Wow, registering for her veil! That is the kicker for me too.
    You guys are mean! She's entitled to that veil! I feel sorry for your SOs. You clearly don't understand that as a Bride, she should get whatever she wants and other people should pay for it. 
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  • beachyone15beachyone15 TEXAS (the home of my exes) member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary First Answer
    Nothing says "help pay for my wedding" like asking your guests to pay for your veil! WTF?!


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  • wandajune6wandajune6 Chicago-ish member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    It's all awful but the veil crosses the line.

    I'm thinking Novella's rock or a metal chicken would be appropriate.
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  • kvrunskvruns member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    Tell your parents to go to Joann Fabrics and buy a length of white tulle and a hair comb.  Ta-da, there is her veil!
    I think Jo Ann's has a veil, maybe Wilton brand or something.  Bet it's less than $10 after coupon! 
  • Yuck. So gross. Will it ever end? 
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  • Geez, I'm surprised she didn't register for her dress too!
  • photokittyphotokitty where I want to be mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Honestly if you could register for a veil at say Macy's or BBB I wouldn't side eye it...it's sort of like registering for champagne flutes or cake cutting stuff, ONLY if you actually can actually buy the actual veil and present it at the shower.

    But "buying" it off a cash registry is just gross.
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

  • Honestly if you could register for a veil at say Macy's or BBB I wouldn't side eye it...it's sort of like registering for champagne flutes or cake cutting stuff, ONLY if you actually can actually buy the actual veil and present it at the shower.

    But "buying" it off a cash registry is just gross.
    *** Boxes? ***
    I would still side-eye a veil if you could register for at Macy's or BBB. The flutes and cake stuff, at least in theory, are also for the benefit of both parts of the couple. A veil is something the bride wears. We used Amazon for our registry because I like their shipping, prices and customer service. We could have registered for almost anything you can buy in any store and it still would have been tacky for me to, for example, register for my wedding shoes. 
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  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Honestly if you could register for a veil at say Macy's or BBB I wouldn't side eye it...it's sort of like registering for champagne flutes or cake cutting stuff, ONLY if you actually can actually buy the actual veil and present it at the shower.

    But "buying" it off a cash registry is just gross.
    Ehh.. I disagree, because you're never wearing that veil again. Not only is it only for the wedding, it's only for the ceremony and some pretty pictures (judging by how I never see brides wear their veils to the dance floor...). Champagne flutes and cake cutting stuff can be used again.  So the veil is contributing to the wedding costs; the other stuff is a lifelong gift. 
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  • photokittyphotokitty where I want to be mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited May 2015
    Honestly if you could register for a veil at say Macy's or BBB I wouldn't side eye it...it's sort of like registering for champagne flutes or cake cutting stuff, ONLY if you actually can actually buy the actual veil and present it at the shower.

    But "buying" it off a cash registry is just gross.
    Ehh.. I disagree, because you're never wearing that veil again. Not only is it only for the wedding, it's only for the ceremony and some pretty pictures (judging by how I never see brides wear their veils to the dance floor...). Champagne flutes and cake cutting stuff can be used again.  So the veil is contributing to the wedding costs; the other stuff is a lifelong gift. 
    I see your point. I guess I would lump it in with buying wedding night lingerie or a robe for the bride. Neither are uncommon gifts in my circle at a shower. If I knew what veil my sister wanted and it was within my budget I would consider giving it as a shower gift. I think it would be a very personalized and treasured gift. But then we give garters and six pence, stuff like that, as well. I guess registering it is pretty gauche, but not gifting it IMHO. 
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

  • FiancBFiancB MinnesOOOta member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    I'm pretty sure one of the wedding shops in town has an option to register for your dress and everything. 
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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited May 2015
    Honestly if you could register for a veil at say Macy's or BBB I wouldn't side eye it...it's sort of like registering for champagne flutes or cake cutting stuff, ONLY if you actually can actually buy the actual veil and present it at the shower.

    But "buying" it off a cash registry is just gross.
    Ehh.. I disagree, because you're never wearing that veil again. Not only is it only for the wedding, it's only for the ceremony and some pretty pictures (judging by how I never see brides wear their veils to the dance floor...). Champagne flutes and cake cutting stuff can be used again.  So the veil is contributing to the wedding costs; the other stuff is a lifelong gift. 
    I see your point. I guess I would lump it in with buying wedding night lingerie or a robe for the bride. Neither are uncommon gifts in my circle at a shower. If I knew what veil my sister wanted and it was within my budget I would consider giving it as a shower gift. I think it would be a very personalized and treasured gift. But then we give garters and six pence, stuff like that, as well. I guess registering it is pretty gauche, but not gifting it IMHO. 
    But do people register for those things, or do you just gift them?

    My sister borrowed my veil, and I probably would have brought it to her shower if she'd had one. Still, she wouldn't have registered for it. I see the lingerie like with the champagne flutes and cake cutters, those are common shower gifts in my circle, but no one registers for them. 

    ETA: words
  • photokittyphotokitty where I want to be mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Honestly if you could register for a veil at say Macy's or BBB I wouldn't side eye it...it's sort of like registering for champagne flutes or cake cutting stuff, ONLY if you actually can actually buy the actual veil and present it at the shower.

    But "buying" it off a cash registry is just gross.
    Ehh.. I disagree, because you're never wearing that veil again. Not only is it only for the wedding, it's only for the ceremony and some pretty pictures (judging by how I never see brides wear their veils to the dance floor...). Champagne flutes and cake cutting stuff can be used again.  So the veil is contributing to the wedding costs; the other stuff is a lifelong gift. 
    I see your point. I guess I would lump it in with buying wedding night lingerie or a robe for the bride. Neither are uncommon gifts in my circle at a shower. If I knew what veil my sister wanted and it was within my budget I would consider giving it as a shower gift. I think it would be a very personalized and treasured gift. But then we give garters and six pence, stuff like that, as well. I guess registering it is pretty gauche, but not gifting it IMHO. 
    But do people register for those things, or do you just gift them?

    My sister borrowed my veil, and I probably would have brought it to her shower if she'd had one. Still, she wouldn't have registered for it. I see the lingerie like with the champagne flutes and cake cutters, those are common shower gifts in my circle, but no one registers for them. 

    ETA: words
    People register for the flutes and cutters, but I've never seen anyone register for the rest. 

    Other than one rude bachelorette party that had an insert for the bride's Victoria Secret registry - no, just no. If I'm close to the bride I will often bring a gift of my own choosing to the B party, but I'm not buying it off a registry bc B parties should not be "gifts expected" events.
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

  • kvrunskvruns member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer

    I saw the update on the Etiquette thread about registering for the rest of their wedding - dress, DJ, photographer, etc.  All I can figure is they have already purchased these items and now are hoping someone will buy them that item and basically just pay them back for it?  Otherwise you're playing with fire not having those things if the wedding is soon enough to have a shower.

    can people buy a partial item - like 1/3 of the dress? I mean is someone really going to buy her whole damn dress for a "shower" other than perhaps someone who had already planned to buy it?

  • Yikes! It's one thing for someone to offer to buy something for the wedding to give at the shower, it's another to ask. Example: my granny is buying our guest book and giving as gift at the shower, but we didn't ask her for it. {it's suppose to be a surprise BUT my mum knew I was hunting for one, so had to tell me}
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