Wedding 911

I don't feel excited anymore

I've been so excited for this day since he asked me to marry him. Everything had been going smooth, everyone seemed to be excited and telling us they would help us out (especially me since he's a truck driver and gone most of the time, so I'm left planning everything). But here lately I've felt like I'm the only person still looking forward to the wedding, I can't get anyone to help and he's never home to help. I hate feeling like this but some days I just don't get as excited as I was. I have 3 months left and I still have so much to do but with no help. His side hasn't paid for anything but they always ask if I've found something or did this or that; when I talk to him he blows it off like it's nothing. Now my family likes like it's nothing or it has to be how they have always pictured a wedding to be. I'm just so ready to pull my hair out :(

Re: I don't feel excited anymore

  • I've been so excited for this day since he asked me to marry him. Everything had been going smooth, everyone seemed to be excited and telling us they would help us out (especially me since he's a truck driver and gone most of the time, so I'm left planning everything). But here lately I've felt like I'm the only person still looking forward to the wedding, I can't get anyone to help and he's never home to help. I hate feeling like this but some days I just don't get as excited as I was. I have 3 months left and I still have so much to do but with no help. His side hasn't paid for anything but they always ask if I've found something or did this or that; when I talk to him he blows it off like it's nothing. Now my family likes like it's nothing or it has to be how they have always pictured a wedding to be. I'm just so ready to pull my hair out :(
    The only people responsible to pay and plan and craft for your wedding are you and your FI.  It's super unrealistic to expect everyone (as well as yourself) to squee about the entire process.  His side isn't required to pay for anything, and neither is yours.  If your Fi is blowing you off when you try to talk to him, that's a relationship problem, not a wedding problem.  But once again, no one is required to pay and help with the wedding except for you two.  

    The wedding industry wants you and everyone in your life to be obsessed with the wedding. This is so you will spend a ton of money.  Are you marrying your FI that day?  Because that's what counts. As long as you accomplish that, and anyone you invite is hosted properly, all of the little tiny details don't really matter.   


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  • What PP said. Also, how much do you talk about wedding planning? Maybe those around you are just burned out from constant wedding talk? You should just take a week off from wedding talk/planning/thinking, you may actually then be more happy and focused afterwards.
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  • If you don't have a time line set up for when things need to be done, get that done immediately. The Knot has a free one available that I found very helpful. It covers the basic stuff. You may have alot of the stuff already done, in that case, it will feel good to mark them off as done. Try to keep things simple and it will reduce your stress. Men typically never get as excited about the wedding details as women do. With your FI being a truck driver, he's probably tired after driving all day so even if he is excited, he's too tired to show it. Don't worry about what your families say & ask about. You and FI are the only ones responsible for paying for anything and if either family asks for something specific and it's not in your budget you tell them that. Same goes for guests, you figure out how many people you can comfortably afford to host and figure how who gets how many guests. You will be fine and the joy will come back.
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