Bridal Shower Dos and Dont

Re: Bridal Shower Dos and Dont

• alithebride member

  

  December 2009 edited December 2011

  email them and ask them 1) if they will be helping to plan/throw it and 2) what they can afford to contribute.

   

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• weddingbells2010

  

  December 2009 edited December 2011

  Agreed with pp.  Ask the girls if they would like to help in A) planning and paying, and if so, what they are comfortable contributing.  You can make more decisions after you get those answers.

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• dianenjnj member

  

  January 2010 edited December 2011

  you, as a relative, cannot ask for financial contributions from her bridal party for your own sister's shower.  if they didn't offer maybe there's a reason.

  
  

  if you want to be nice about it, plan it yourself, pay for it yourself and let the bridesmaids host.

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• flinn017 member

  

  January 2010 edited December 2011

  I would have to disagree about you having to pay all the expenses since you are the relative.  I have planned and helped plan several showers, invovling family and friends of the brides.  I have also been on both sides of the spectrum.  Not being able to contribute a lot toward one shower, and for another one, I contributed and planned more.
  
  Since it is your sister, you should to take the lead role, open the line of communication and get an understanding of what everyone else is expecting.  Each girl should be in charge of a task, some things cost more than others.  But it is important that everyone is involved. 
  

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• dianenjnj member

  

  January 2010 edited December 2011

  unless the bridal party OFFERS without huge hints from you...it would be presumptive to assume they WANT to be assigned duties of throwing  your sister a shower.  if, however,  they offer without prompting fine... if not,  it's rude to ask someone to dip into their pocketbook.

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• weddingbells2010

  

  January 2010 edited December 2011

  Personally, I think there are mixed messages out there about the proper rules on this issue.  If you look for info on the role of a bridesmaid, it very clearly says that part of your role is to help throw a bridal shower.  However, if you're the person in charge, like the MOH, people like pp's say it's rude to ask that of a bridesmaid.  I just don't get the mixed messages.  I think it's rude NOT to ask the girls to participate.  If your'e a close enough person to the bride that you're in the bridal party, you will most likely want to be involved in "showering" her with gifts on her special day.  Obviously there's a difference between ASKING and TELLING, and any good MOH/sister/host will do it gracefully and without judgment on those who can't afford to help much.

  
  

  In the past, it used to be tacky for a family member to host the shower b/c it looked liked you were fishing for gifts for the bride.  However, many brides have family members as bridesmaids- sisters, cousins, I've even heard of a mom as a bridesmaid! If it's okay- and even expected- for the bridal party to throw a shower- and the bridal party happens to be family, then I conclude that it's not inappropriate for you to ask the rest of the girls and take charge of the party.

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• johnarden1

  

  April 2010 edited December 2011

  Please look under the rehersal dinner and showers vendors tab for a professional rehersal dinner and showers company...like J A M- John Arden Muisc

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