Wedding Etiquette Forum

On the one hand, this is in really, really poor taste. And on the other, get wedding insurance, FFS!

312Emily312Emily member
Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
edited July 2015 in Wedding Etiquette Forum
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/post-nation/wp/2015/07/02/dylann-roofs-sister-is-apparently-raising-money-for-her-wedding-and-honeymoon/?tid=sm_fb

So obviously she can't buy an insurance policy now, but I'm going to guess if she'd had one, at least some of the contracts would be covered?  It's ridiculous of her to be asking for money from when people are dead due to a family member's actions.  Not her fault her brother is a creep, but it's in really poor taste to go to the public asking for donations (because of etiquette AND a tragedy).  Geez.  Way to double down on the faux pas.
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Re: On the one hand, this is in really, really poor taste. And on the other, get wedding insurance, FFS!

  • I just... what... sad... no... huh?
  • 312Emily312Emily member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited July 2015
    Also, you'd think it might be in better taste to just cut your losses and maybe see what the vendors you have deposits with can do for the victims.  Like, meals delivered to the church by your caterer, and flowers from your florist.  But no, it's all about HER SPECIAL DAY BEING RUINED.
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    MJKlovercharlottesmom0626
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    Tenth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    No words are adequate.
  • Jells2dot0Jells2dot0 Cowtown mod
    Moderator Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited July 2015

    I don't know if wedding insurance covers "my brother is a mass murderer." I had wedding insurance for my first wedding and I don't think it covered acts of terrorism. But, I could be wrong. That was in 2004.

    That being said, this is one of those times where you just run off and elope. If she really wants to be married, just take what little money you have left, avoid any media attention, and disappear to get married.

     

    ETF- words are hard

     







    lyndausvi312Emily
  • I don't know if wedding insurance covers "my brother is mass murder." I had wedding insurance for my first wedding and I don't think it covered acts of terrorism. But, I could be wrong. That was in 2004.

    That being said, this is one of those times where you just run off and elope. If she really wants to be married, just take what little money you have left, avoid any media attention, and disappear to get married.



    Ah, you're right.  Acts of terrorism not covered. And even so, I don't think you're covered if a reason for canceling is an immediate family member is jailed (as opposed to sick or dead).  But yeah, elopement is really the only graceful option in this case.
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  • Yeah, I don't think wedding insurance would cover that.

    And while the GFM is awful, I do feel bad.   Imagine you're in the home stretch with everything set and excited family members and now none of it happens and it's because your family member is an asshole.   
  • marie2785marie2785 member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited July 2015
    I feel really bad for the bride since it seems clear she does not agree with her brother's terrible actions, but this is not the right way to deal with it. At the end of the day her wanting a wedding is not comparable to the needs of those who lost loved ones. Donations should go to cover those families' expenses (funerals, lost income, etc), not her wedding day. 

    If I were her I'd also be nervous about a bunch of racists donating to this in an effort to support her brother. 

    EDIT: Looks like she took down her go fund me page. Smart move on her part. 
  • arrrghmateyarrrghmatey member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
    edited July 2015
    312Emily said:

    I don't know if wedding insurance covers "my brother is mass murder." I had wedding insurance for my first wedding and I don't think it covered acts of terrorism. But, I could be wrong. That was in 2004.

    That being said, this is one of those times where you just run off and elope. If she really wants to be married, just take what little money you have left, avoid any media attention, and disappear to get married.



    Ah, you're right.  Acts of terrorism not covered. And even so, I don't think you're covered if a reason for canceling is an immediate family member is jailed (as opposed to sick or dead).  But yeah, elopement is really the only graceful option in this case.
    Some insurance plans (and even venues) do, but not many. Both our venue and our insurance covers acts of terrorism. HOWEVER, I'm pretty sure it wouldn't cover something like this--more along the lines of if your venue was a target of a terrorism attack. You just have to make sure you read the fine print. But what this young lady did was certainly in poor taste. Donating to the church? Okay fine. But getting donations for your HM?? Just…no.
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  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited July 2015
    Huh.

    This truly is terrible, and I do feel bad for her- but wrong way to deal with it.

    I don't know if she removed the GFM or the site removed it, but I feel she wouldn't faired better if she told her vendors what happened, or some news got out about it, and more likely she'd get some vendors offer to donate their services.

    Honestly, we didn't have insurance. But if something happened, we would've sucked it up, saved up again, or went to City Hall. You don't ask other people to fund your wedding and honeymoon.

    Also, saying you'll donate 10% to the church feels wrong.... yes, donating is good, but your wedding doesn't compare to peoples lives, loss of income, the cost of a funeral... don't mix the two.
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