Wedding Etiquette Forum

How to list deceased grandparents who were widowed and remarried

My paternal grandmother passed away when my father was 2 years old and my grandfather remarried shortly after.  I want to include my maternal grandmother and my grandfather and step-grandmother under my In Memorium section of my program.  What is the correct way to word or list this?  Everything I've come up with looks awkward.  Is there a particular way to do this that is "correct"?

Re: How to list deceased grandparents who were widowed and remarried

  • I would just list each person separately and try to not address married/widowed couples.  So instead of listing Jane & John Doe, grandparents of bride.  You could put Jane Doe, Suzy Doe, John Doe, grandparents of bride.  I don't think you need to get into the specifics of which woman was your step-grandmother or whether the person is a maternal or paternal grandparent.


  • Just list their names & not their relationship to you
  • I'd just list each one individually by name and let it go at that.
  • In Memorium
    Mr. and Mrs. Grandfatherfirst Grandfatherlast
    Mrs. Grandmother

    or

    Jim and Sally Granddad
    Katie Grandmum

    You don't need an in memorium at all, especially if it is problematic, and you certainly do not need to list everyone's exact relationships to you.
  • I, personally, dislike memorial at weddings, even listing in the program.  I did not mention my deceased relatives at my wedding, not even my Dad.  This is just my personal opinion.
    It is your wedding.  Your guests are there to celebrate, not to  mourn.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Am I an asshole for thinking it's odd to put a family member you've never met (or even that your parents remember) in a memorial section? 
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • Am I an asshole for thinking it's odd to put a family member you've never met (or even that your parents remember) in a memorial section? 
    That's actually a really good point.  Just because someone donated some DNA to your creation doesn't mean you're thinking of her on your wedding day.  In fact, since she died when your parent was young you (and practically your parent) doesn't even know this person.
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