Sorry if this doesn't fall into the correct category, let me know if I should move it.
First off, I have asked family members and friends and everyone says it is ultimately my choice and I should do what makes me happy, however, I don't personally know anyone who has been in a situation similar to mine. I'd love to hear from someone who has been through a similar situation or just outside perspectives, I am so on the fence about this.
Here's the deal: My family is crazy(like so many others). My Grandfather raised me because my Mother was a drug addict(shes is now clean and sober, but still fairly unreliable, shes just flighty.) I have really struggled with wanting her to be at my wedding and be part of the planning as our relationship has been so strained, but I've done a lot of thinking about it and decided that I do want to include her in this part of my life.
Now here is the issue: My Mother has one sister. While I was growing up I always did things with my Aunt and her kids, but since I've been an adult she and I do not see eye to on a lot of things and have had some arguments over the way she treats others in the family. She and her Husband do not invite me to family functions, call me on holidays, or anything like. My Aunts daughter and I also do not get along very well because she is very immature and has a history of taking advantage of my sisters kindness. I am fairly certain I do not want to invite them to my wedding. Since I feel like you should invite people to your wedding that love and support you and people that you want to be part of your future lives as a married couple, and these family members do not fit that bill.
Is this too mean? or too harsh? if I do not invite them they only family I will have at my wedding is my Mom and Sisters. (My grandfather will try to make it but his health isn't great.)
One more thing to add, I've asked my grandfather what he thinks, and he said he thinks these family members resent me because I'm the only one that has left our home town and "done well for myself", while everyone else just kind of follows the same circle. He thinks its best that I invite them to show them "what they are missing out on" then cut them off. (He is sometimes wise, but spiteful.) I don't feel that is the right thing to do at all.
Sorry so long....
I guess long story short, Do I invite family members even though they aren't really close to me and don't seem to want to be close to me?