Hello everyone! So I have a friend that I've been close to for several years; I was asked to be bridesmaids when she first got engaged three years ago. The wedding had to be pushed back multiple times, and is now set for this fall. A few weeks ago, I got a job offer that would be perfect for my career and career goals, and I really need to take it. The only problem is that it's across an ocean from my hometown, and the wedding. There's no way I could make it back (I'd need to take several days off, which I'm not sure I can being new in the position, and pay more money than I have for a plane ticket).
I finally mustered up the courage to break the news to the bride (my friends were warning me she might freak out), and she took it super well! Then, in a conversation a few days later, though, she asked if I would mind if she replaced me with another friend to ensure that she would have even sides - I think her parents especially are concerned about the pictures. I was taken by surprise and initially said I didn't care, but the more that I think about it, I am a little hurt by the idea. I can't help but feel like the bride just saw me as a prop or a number to fill out even sides - easily replaceable. Everyone I've mentioned these to (both in-person friends and online), has said it's my fault in the first place for dropping out, it's her day, and basically that it's silly to be upset at all.
Is this a completely ridiculous way to feel? Should I say anything to her? Has anyone else ever been in this situation (whether as a bride or a bridesmaid), and if so, what did you do? What's the proper etiquette for this situation?