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How to convey no gifts?

snowywintersnowywinter member
250 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
My fiance and I have everything we need/want. Given that our wedding will cost a lot of money for our friends and family to make it since they're all out of state and it's an expensive time of year, we don't want guests to be burdened with having to buy a wedding gift or giving us money on top of that. Is it okay to just say no gifts necessary on the invitations? I just don't want some ignoring that and bringing a gift anyway, making others feel awkward if they didn't.
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Re: How to convey no gifts?

  • artbyallieartbyallie mod
    Moderator Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    What Addie said.
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    No. Never mention gifts in invitations-not enen to indicate "no gifts." It comes across as greedy and entitled.
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  • Blue_BirdBlue_Bird member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments First Answer
    Gifts are never necessary. Most people send gifts ahead of time rather than bring them to the wedding. No one will feel awkward if someone else brings a gift. As others have said, make no mention of gifts as it's impolite, and if someone asks let him know you have everything you need. Send prompt thank you notes for any gifts you do receive (if any). People give wedding gifts out of joy and good will, not a sense of obligation.
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  • novella1186novella1186 member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    No need to mention anything, other than if people ask you directly as Addie said. If I couldn't afford to get you a gift after the cost of travel, I wouldn't, regardless of what your invite said. If I could afford it and really wanted to give you one, I would --again-- regardless of what your invitation said. Some people truly love to give gifts so it's a fun thing for them. 

    Adults can decide what to do with their money and whether or not they can afford/want to give a gift. 
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  • snowywintersnowywinter member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    edited August 2015
    Thank you everyone. I guess my family is just weird about the gift thing. It's considered a huge faux pas to go to any party (birthday party, graduation, wedding, anything) and not bring a gift, even if the host doesn't have a registry or there's nothing they've told you they want. That's just how my parents were raised so my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, are all like that. But you're right that I don't want it to come across wrong on the invite, so I'll leave it off and just try to spread by word of mouth.
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  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited August 2015
    If that's how your family is, you will probably get gifts, even if you did put "No gifts necessary" on your invites (which you shouldn't do, as that implies there was an expectation of a gift in the first place).

    So, let adults be adults and decide how to spend their money. If we have to travel for a wedding, it may affect how much we are able to give for a gift at that time, or it might not. Point being, we know what our finances are and what we are comfortable giving someone as a gift.

    If people ask you can always tell them you are not registered and are happy just to have everyone attend.
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