WWYD?

AddieCake · August 2015

I went to a wedding in November for someone at work with whom I'm not really close. I'm sure I was only invited because we are in the same department. They had a honeymoon registry, so I ignored that, of course, and intended to just give them a check. I kept forgetting about it all this time. Should I still give it to them or just forget it at this point? I didn't take it to the wedding itself because I hadn't yet gotten a card in time.

ShesSoCold · August 2015

I'm broke, cheap and kind of a dick, so if I didn't particularly like or care about the opinion of the person, I'd forget it. But if I liked them or felt bad, I'd give them a gift and a verbal, "hey I am so sorry this took me long! I loved your wedding blah blah blah".

banana468 · August 2015

ShesSoCold said:
I'm broke, cheap and kind of a dick, so if I didn't particularly like or care about the opinion of the person, I'd forget it. But if I liked them or felt bad, I'd give them a gift and a verbal, "hey I am so sorry this took me long! I loved your wedding blah blah blah".

This. We had people give us "late" gifts and I definitely appreciated the gesture.

CMGragain · August 2015

It is acceptable to give a wedding gift up until one year after the wedding, so you'd better get going!

Blue_Bird · August 2015

AddieCake said:
I went to a wedding in November for someone at work with whom I'm not really close. I'm sure I was only invited because we are in the same department. They had a honeymoon registry, so I ignored that, of course, and intended to just give them a check. I kept forgetting about it all this time. Should I still give it to them or just forget it at this point? I didn't take it to the wedding itself because I hadn't yet gotten a card in time.

It sounds like you'd rather not, so I wouldn't worry about it.

WinstonsGirl · August 2015

You do have up to a year (we actually got 1 wedding gift about 2.5 years after the wedding), so if you really want to, send it. If not, don't worry about it. Is it something that will/already has caused friction at work??

AddieCake · August 2015

WinstonsGirl said:

You do have up to a year (we actually got 1 wedding gift about 2.5 years after the wedding), so if you really want to, send it. If not, don't worry about it. Is it something that will/already has caused friction at work??

I don't think it has or will. I rarely see or talk to this colleague, so I have no way of knowing if she is the type to be thinking, "I cannot believe she didn't get us a gift!" I really would rather not because we've had a lot of unexpected expenses come up recently, and I have things the money would be better spent on, but I've never gone to a wedding and not given a gift. I feel weird not giving one, but even one of her bridesmaids (who I am good friends with) told me not to worry about it. Ugh. I just can't decide. Thanks for the input, everyone!

Jen4948 · August 2015

Since you have until a year after the wedding to give them a gift, you can do so any time up to then when your finances improve.

STARMOON44 · August 2015

Don't do it.

JellyBean52513 · August 2015

If I were in your position, I would probably give my co-worker the check and own up to my forgetfulness a la "This is you're wedding gift I've been forgetting to give you for almost a year now, I'm sorry for being such a scatterbrain. Thank you again for the great time at your wedding."

SP29 · August 2015

Personally, I would give a gift, even if it is a small gift card to a restaurant or grocery store.

I know gifts are never required, but I would feel awkward for going to a wedding and not giving some sort of gift. If I didn't like the couple enough to give a gift, I wouldn't go to the wedding.

I think it's fine to give a gift late.

IrishPirate60 · August 2015

What a great opportunity to affirm the marriage. All the hoopla is over, they've probably had a few rough days, and would appreciate a card that acknowledges the long-term commitment they made. Maybe a date night basket?

AddieCake · August 2015

OK, I think I am leaning toward doing it since I do think it will bug me forever if I don't and the majority of you seem to think it's the right move. Thanks again, everyone!

luckya23 · August 2015

As a guest, I would feel weird not giving a gift at all, especially if it's someone I'm going to have to see again (ie: my coworker rather than someone DH works with).

As a bride though, DAMN I THOUGHT I WAS FINISHED WITH THANK YOU CARDS!

snowywinter · August 2015

I think you're making the right decision in choosing to give the gift now. I, too, would feel weird attending a wedding without giving a gift, even if it's late. I understand that technically guests shouldn't be expected to give a gift, but I have never attended a birthday, graduation, or wedding without a gift and never plan to.

AddieCake · August 2015

luckya23 said:

As a guest, I would feel weird not giving a gift at all, especially if it's someone I'm going to have to see again (ie: my coworker rather than someone DH works with).
As a bride though, DAMN I THOUGHT I WAS FINISHED WITH THANK YOU CARDS!

Probably not an issue. From what I hear, nobody has gotten a thank you note.

WWYD?

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