Wedding Woes

Wedding Planner Disappointment

I met with a wedding planner yesterday to discuss her possibly being my DOC and I really just was so disappointed that I feel the need to vent it.

First, I go to the address for what I assumed was her office, but was actually her house - not a big deal in itself. I'm just used to people who work out of their home asking to meet in a coffee shop or something for the first meeting. But when she came to the door she didn't introduce herself or ask who I was - just "come in" and motioned to the living room. I had to ask if I was in the right place.

Second, it was clear that she had not cleaned up that living room in the last few weeks or so and the coffee table was piled up with random things and her lunch plate - maybe I was being too judgy of her cleaning habits, but not a good first impression for someone that wants me to hire them to run my wedding day. 

Third, she had a binder that she took a sheet out of, read the front (it appeared to be a catering menu from another wedding), and then proceeded to take notes of what I said on the back. Not exactly the super organized planner I was hoping for.

Fourth, every time she asked me a question, my answer reminded her of another wedding and she would proceed to tell me a story about someone else's wedding plans that she was working on - and most of them involved her disapproval of what they wanted or how silly they were being. I have no problem with her having those opinions, but to talk smack about a client to a potential client? Nope. Not to mention that over half of the consultation was about someone else's wedding.

Fifth, when I told her I was inviting kids to the wedding, she commented that she hates when people don't, especially because its usually because people are going to be drinking. Then she proceeded on a 5 minute rant about how trashy it is for people to get drunk at weddings and she was glad I wasn't going to be one of "those" brides. That is until I told her we were still serving alcohol after dinner and she had to backtrack really quickly.

Sixth, there were several things I mentioned doing that she immediately shot down. Have my sister do my make-up? My pictures are gonna look awful. Mom doing my hair? Only if its a super easy style. FBIL in charge of iPod playlist? Nope, gotta have a DJ. Ummm, you've never met these people, nor do you know what talents they have - don't tell me they can't handle it.

Lastly, and I was relieved of this actually, she informed me that she was not prepared to book my wedding as her printer had broken and she had no way to get any paperwork ready. Although, I had scheduled this meeting over a week ago, so if she had been prepared she could have printed it any one of the 9 days before somewhere else.

I know in the long run this is not a major ordeal, but I was looking forward to knowing that FI and I weren't going to have to coordinate everything ourselves. We live in a rural area and this planner was the only one less than 2 hours away from us, so I was so hopeful that she would work out. The DOC budget is going have to go up quite a bit now since whoever we hire will have to travel to us and - from my research - require a hotel room. Time for some number crunching and budget readjustment.

Re: Wedding Planner Disappointment

  • I got married without a wedding planner or DOC.
    What are you looking for this person to do? I can't imagine that being a DOC requires any special skills beyond telling people what to do. If you have family taking the place of other typical vendors (stylist/make-up,DJ) why not ask someone you know to help coordinate the rest of the activities? 

  • It sounds like you're already asking your family/guests to be your vendors..  Why budget for a DOC when it sounds like you've got people doing this stuff for you?  You can pay your vendors more to do the work for you without hiring a DOC.  For example, you can pay your caterer and/or florist a little more to set up the tables for you.  You can pay your rental company a little more to do the setup/decorations/take apart.  Just as the PP mentioned - what's the purpose of getting a DOC if you're already handling these details and for all practical purposes, if you're working with the right vendors they'll make your life easy to the point of not being afraid to say "you hired us to do a job for you, we've got you covered, we'll make a note of that last minute change, see you Saturday!"  Whether you have a DOC or not, you'll still need to make final calls and communicate final details, write out checks, etc. 

    IMO, I'd RUN from that "coordinator"...  Home based business, I get it, out of their home, but depending on what they're trying to charge if they don't have their stuff enough together to have a room or meeting space, then shooting down every idea any bride has ever had - yea... no...  Honestly, someone like that sounds like the "I helped (overthrew) my (pushover) bestie plan her wedding and had so much fun I should get paid to do this!"

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • The main reason I was looking for a DoC is that the venue I chose has no staff - they are letting us in to the building that morning and locking up that night - nothing in between. I wanted someone to help with the ceremony, keep FI and myself from having to run down people for photos, and making sure the night flows as it should without us/our families having to watch the clock all night.

    And just in case you were wondering, the family I mentioned doing hair etc. came to me and offered to do so - I did not go to them and ask.

    @MesmrEwe That is pretty much the story she told me when I asked how she got started - Planned a friend's wedding and had so much fun, she started a business.
  • If she cannot keep her own life organized, no way I would hire her to organize your day.
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