Wedding Invitations & Paper

Save the Dates-Who gets them?

We are planning a wedding in Las Vegas, where we live.  We are planning on sending Save the Dates to our out of town guests.  Should we send them to people who live here as well?  

Re: Save the Dates-Who gets them?

  • You can send them to your entire guest list if you want.  But keep in mind that whoever gets a STD must also then be invited to your wedding.  Since STDs are sent out about a year in advance a lot can change between now and your wedding, such as your budget, that may cause you to have to cut your guest list or change your plans.  So I would suggest your OOT guests and VIP guests (immediate family and such) get STDs and no one else.  This way you aren't putting yourself in a possible bad situation if for some reason plans need to be changed.

  • I would send them to VIP guests as well as any guests who need longer than 6 to 8 weeks to determine if they can come and make the necessary arrangements.

    Beyond that, you can send them to anyone else you plan to actually invite.  That's up to you, but every save-the-date must be followed by an actual invitation to the wedding.

  • If you wanted, you could send them to your entire guest list.  We did.  But like PP's have said, anyone who may need more notice than just a short time to make their arrangements.  Just make sure, that if you do send to your entire guest list, that you are truly committed to sending an invite to every person who receives a STD.
  • We did our entire guest list and wish we didn't.  For example, I sent STDs to a bunch of coworkers in February.  In June, I switched jobs and haven't heard from hardly any of them since I left.  But since we sent a STD, we HAD to send them an invite. Only one of them is coming.

    So, I agree, just send to VIPs and people who need to travel.  I would also say that if any of your in town guests have kids, and the kids aren't invited, maybe send to them too so they have plenty of time to work out childcare arrangements.  
    Married 9.12.15
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  • I would stick with PP and send to only VIPs and OOT guests first. You can always send formal invites to more than those who received STDs.

    Similarly to @julieanne912, FI and I sent STDs to a good chunk of our guest list for our wedding next May...here's where we differ: FI's best man and best man's gf had been in a long-term relationship, and lived together, so naturally we sent the STD to both of them as a couple. FF to 1 month ago, and SURPRISE, they are no longer best man & lady friend. I wouldn't be upset/confused about what to do if said lady friend had also been a friend of mine/FI's outside of just being best man's lady friend...but now I truly don't know what to do bc she was given an STD, so etiquette says formal invite is to follow. I don't want to be rude nor do I want to hurt anyone's feelings. 
  • I would stick with PP and send to only VIPs and OOT guests first. You can always send formal invites to more than those who received STDs.

    Similarly to @julieanne912, FI and I sent STDs to a good chunk of our guest list for our wedding next May...here's where we differ: FI's best man and best man's gf had been in a long-term relationship, and lived together, so naturally we sent the STD to both of them as a couple. FF to 1 month ago, and SURPRISE, they are no longer best man & lady friend. I wouldn't be upset/confused about what to do if said lady friend had also been a friend of mine/FI's outside of just being best man's lady friend...but now I truly don't know what to do bc she was given an STD, so etiquette says formal invite is to follow. I don't want to be rude nor do I want to hurt anyone's feelings. 
    If the only reason the lady friend was on the save-the-date was because at the time she was the SO of the best man, she doesn't need to be sent an invitation.
  • Thank you all for your feedback!
  • Thank you Jen4948! I really did not want to step outside of proper etiquette and end up being out of line!
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