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Wedding Hair and Beauty

Calling All Alternative Brides

Hello, hello.

I was sad to see that, among the many bride-type specific boards, there isn't one for alternative types. What do I mean by alternative?

Tattooed, pierced, unnaturally dyed/oddly cut hair, and/or women with a very specific style that may fall outside the traditional (black wedding dress, anyone?).

I'm a green-haired, tattooed color woman with fifteen piercings. Currently I'm in the process of finishing my left sleeve, and three of my piercings are on my face. My FI, who is very conservative looking, loves my personal style and doesn't want me to change a thing. My mother has embraced the crazy hair and asked if she can put a streak of it in her own hair for the wedding (which I love!), but is trying to convince me to go face-piercingless. Obviously, I'm going to choose whatever feels right to me in the end.

However, I wanted to ask if any of my fellow alternative looking brides have encountered difficulties or have advice to give. Did you change yourself for the wedding and regret it? Did you not hide/change something and regret that? Impart your wisdom, share your stories, talk about your worries, hopes, fears.





Pinksatin91016VanessaCharlotte

Re: Calling All Alternative Brides

  • I have seen some fabulous pictures of tattooed and pierced brides. That being said, they were dressed either completely alternatively, no white dress, (usually steampunk inspired, goth, rockabilly etc) or done up to the nines. I think if your look is your look and it's not going to be a shock to anyone the day of, go with it. 

    My step mom is a hairdresser, my hair has been every shade imaginable, sometimes intentionally. The philosophy is that it is just hair. Tattoos are my favourite expression, if the artwork is done well, they are beautiful. I'm not big on piercings because I've not had good luck with them, but some are done well, and I understand them for other people.

    In the end, how you look won't matter to anyone but you and your FI.
  • There's an Offbeat Weddings forum on here that I also moderate. You mentioned there wasn't one, but there is. Check it out if you'd like. There are many "alternative" brides on this forum.

    I have tattoos, have had different "crazy" hair colors and styles, and prefer to only wear black. I'm not really going for an "alt" look on my wedding but I'm not trying to look "traditional" either. I'm picking things that I genuinely like that feel "me". I'm keeping my hair black for the wedding because that's what photographs best on me (dark brown is my natural color). My tattoos will not be covered and I'll be wearing heavy makeup and teased hair. That's what makes me feel best. Attempting to look too bridal or like I'm trying to hard to be an offbeat bride will just be weird because it's not natural to me and my personality.

    Do what feels best for you and you won't regret it.


    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers



    CMGragain
  • I checked that out, and that's not really what I was looking for, but thanks. I'm not having an offbeat wedding, but I identify as an alternative person by nature. I mean, I'll look alternative even without an "offbeat" wedding, since that's just the way I look.

    Most likely I'm keeping my hair green for my wedding. It looks awesome on me, my FI loves it.





  • climbingwifeclimbingwife NYC 'burbs member
    10000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    For my first wedding (10 years ago, I was 24), my mom was insistent that I cover up the tattoo on my shoulder. She and my dad were footing the whole bill for the wedding, so I felt pressure to comply. I covered it, and I'm sorry I did. The MUA who insisted that the product she used wouldn't come off, ended up coming off all over my veil. Half way through the reception, I went to the bathroom and had someone wipe off the makeup for me. I was so angry at myself for letting my mom dictate that. 

    For my second wedding, I had that same tattoo redone. My tattoos are a part of me, and I'm not changing the way I look for anyone. 

    randomslove
  • I specifically purchased a dress, which is grey, where you can see my entire back pieces and my chest piece. I did get a longer dress so my leg tattoos are covered, but I'm ok with that. I also have facial piercings and currently do not wear them since I can not wear them at work, but I fully plan on having them in for my wedding day, as my fiance, like yours is more on the conservative side and loves me for me. As for my hair I had been rocking shades of red for the past 6 years and on a whim stripped it out and when blondish... still up in the air on what to do with my hair color/style for the wedding.

    I agree through there should be an Alternative bride forum, as the more traditional brides do not seem to understand my lack of care of what a wedding "should be"
  • aliwis000aliwis000 member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments Third Anniversary First Answer
    edited May 2015
    I think you have a really good attitude on this. You should do what makes you feel best.

    I just have my ears pierced and no tattoos, just not my personal style. I think your wedding day is a day you should be yourself, well maybe a dressed up version of yourself. Myself is is usually in jeans and a t-shirt so I am obviously stepping that up. :)

    Your FI is marrying you, your style is a part of that. Wearing all the piercings, just wearing some of them, covering/not covering the tattoos, totally up to you. I will say I think the pictures of tattooed brides look best when the dress compliments it. When you can see the whole, or majority, of the tattoo or the dress frames it in some way.

    Have a fantastic wedding and be sure to show us some pics of your dress!

  • I guess technically mine is going to be alternative?

    One of my bridesmaids has half her head shaved, she offered to grow it out but I am not about that life! So since I have an under buzz that we're dying red {to match my Louboutins! *dies*} we're gonna colour her buzz red :D She also has 2 tatts on her arms.

    Also I have 2 tatts that will be very visible {arm and foot} and a giant one on my back is hiding underneath my strap sorta {which is good because it needs touch ups}

    FI has 2 large tatts on either forearm that will be shown because he's in a short sleeve dress shirt.

    One of my other bridesmaids has piercings.

    I would not cover anything. This is who you are! :D
  • I agree about an alternative bride section. My fiance and I are in the leather community and it would be great to be able to talk about that kind of thing. We're doing a mildly steampunk/geek wedding, and the date we picked is May 4th because of reasons that should be obvious. (May the Fourth). I don't have any tattoos yet but I will by the time we get married and he has a bunch. He's pagan and I'm Jewish so its also going to be interfaith. He wants to carry a sword and have a broom to jump and I'm totally okay with that. We're really relaxed and practical so its going to have just hints of steampunk and geekery throughout. 
    OurWildKingdom
  • edited October 2015

    Be true to yourself. Do what you feel is right for you. Make or don't make any changes based on what you want to do. You don't want to look at your wedding photos years from now and go "why did I cave into the pressure and change xxx about myself for my wedding day."

    And this advise is coming from a tatoo free, no piercing person, who told her BM to show off her artwork proudly in a beautiful strapless BM dress even though she offered to cover them for the day. I love my friend for the person she is and everything about her, I wouldn't want to look back at my photos and go, damm, I made her change who she is, that isn't right.

     

    hellohkbthespeshulestsnowflake
  • I have blonde and purple hair. I have tattoos and piercings. FI has his whole back tattooed. My dress will cover my leg tattoos, but the one on my arm will be visible. After the wedding, I'm going to be starting my half sleeve, so excited about that. I will be keeping the purple hair for the wedding and my mom made a comment about having to explain to my kids why I had purple hair for my wedding, my response was "I'll tell them that their mom is a badass." She hasn't brought it up since.

    You should feel beautiful on your wedding day. Your tattoos and piercings are apart of who you are and why wouldn't you want to show that on your wedding day? You are going to be beautiful showing them or not.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I have some tattoos but they will be covered by my gown. My hair is pinky/red and both of my parents have asked if I was changing it for the wedding. I also have a pixie cut and my mom is trying to get me to keep longer for the wedding. Nope! Maybe in the future I'll grow my hair again and I'm fine with that, but right now this is how I love to look and that's how I want to remember my wedding day, feeling like I looked the absolutely best I could right now.

    Do what feels natural and right for you.

  • We are having a Rockabilly inspired wedding....I am actually changing my dress to highlight my tattoos instead of changing myself to conform with "wedding norm". I chose Alfred Angelo cinderella 205 and I am having it cut to a ballerina length in the front to show off my day of the dead tattoo as well as match the overall feel of "Rockabilly" more than the floor length version. Above all your wedding is about you and your hubby and you shoulld stay true to who you are....if your guests don't get that, maybe they shouldn't be celebrating your special day with you?

  • edited February 2016
    Hey there! So called "alternative bride" here, though I really don't view myself as terribly alternative :smile: 

    I'm getting a specific tattoo for my wedding as "something blue". Backseam stocking tattoos with baby blue ribbons to be specific. 

    I'm definitely not changing myself too much for the wedding, but I am trying to be mindful by compromising a bit as my fiance is a bit more traditional than I am. I'm wearing a dress that isn't white, but it's still a light-ish color (dusty lavender), for instance. 
    "But feeeemales are strong as hell~"
    thisismynickname2
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    FW has a tattoo and is wearing a sleeveless off-white dress to show it off.

    As for me, I'm torn between a suit and a retro navy blue dress; I'll be 41, and I look like death warmed over in white. 

    We'll both be wearing Chuck Taylors, in homage to the Tenth Doctor and for the sake of comfort.
  • @VanessaCharlotte that tattoo idea is adorable. I'm actually getting a tattoo right before my wedding-- my MOH is my little sister and she's been asking for matching tattoos for years, so her gift is going to be getting them for us. I love the idea of the lavender dress as well. Have you posted a picture of it?

    @OurWildKingdome -- I love that you and your FW are letting your personalities show in your wedding attire, too. I'm actually wearing fluffy white booties with red hearts for the ceremony and changing into my normal boots for dancing.





    VanessaCharlotteOurWildKingdom
  • Hey @randomslove,

    I posted a pic in the beauty forum, but here ya go:



    It's on ModCloth for pretty darn cheap. I like that it's not floor length, 'cause I'd probably trip over a long dress. And I personally adore the color, 'cause purple is totally my power color, haha. So yeah, still light colored, but not bright white. I've never worn white a day in my life and have no desire to 'cause I think white would look awful with my skin complexion.

    Can I see your dress? :smile: 





    "But feeeemales are strong as hell~"
    OurWildKingdomrandomslovePaperTigersx
  • randomsloverandomslove member
    250 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    edited February 2016
    That is beautiful. Purple is the royal color, so it's a good 'power color' for someone to have. I like your taste. The neckline is lovely, too. What kind of shoes are you wearing?

    My dress is pretty traditional-- ivory, long, modest train. A bridal boutique had a giveaway for military brides and brides marrying someone in the military, and included vets in that. So it was free. It's a St. Patrick dress, but I have no idea about that brand overall. I just tried it on and loved it. It's more traditional/princessy than I thought I'd like. Oddly enough, I look tan in this picture, which means the dress doesn't wash me out despite my paleness.

    And in the background is my shepherd, Peasy. This photo was to show the dress to my mother.
    @VanessaCharlotte

    ETA: Tag, also... that's hilarious. I just realised I uploaded this picture with a batch of a friend's photos.





    OurWildKingdom
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    edited February 2016
    @randomslove, that is a gorgeous dress! And Peasy is a cutie pie.
  • @randomslove, that is such a pretty dress! It looks amazing on you. :smile: 

    And your dog Peasy is adorable <3
    "But feeeemales are strong as hell~"
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    @VanessaCharlotte, I adore your dress too. I'm slightly obsessed with ModCloth.
    VanessaCharlotte
  • @OurWildKingdom, Thank you! I'm obsessed with ModCloth too! My wishlist on that site goes on forever :smile: 
    "But feeeemales are strong as hell~"
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    edited March 2016
    Just got my hair cut wicked short and intend to keep it that way for a while. It's longer on top but really short in back. I'm trying to decide what kind of hair ornaments to use (if any).

    ETA: Please excuse the goofy face in the second photo. I was concentrating on trying to get some of the back view.


  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I'm not alternative (one tattoo under normal clothes), but I would think it weird if an alternatively-styled friend of mine turned into a Disney princess for the day. You have to be yourself, the person your intended loves and knows they're marrying. 
    I agree with the comment that a dress will hopefully compliment or frame tattoos. My good friend has a lot of floral tattoos on her wrists and back, and her dress had floral detailing that suited all of that very well.
    (Incidentally, that was a wedding where I think only one member of a 12-person bridal party didn't have tattoos, and I was the only woman who didn't have any visibly showing, haha. And yet overall it was a pretty traditional wedding with traditional outfits and whatnot.)

    ________________________________


  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    edited March 2016
    Thinking of coloring my hair black with dark red highlights for the wedding. I've always colored my own hair, though, and I'm a little leery of doing highlights. Suggestions?
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Thinking of coloring my hair black with dark red highlights for the wedding. I've always colored my own hair, though, and I'm a little leery of doing highlights. Suggestions?
    I bet it would look great, but if you're leery of doing it yourself, is a professional in the budget? 
    ________________________________


  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Thinking of coloring my hair black with dark red highlights for the wedding. I've always colored my own hair, though, and I'm a little leery of doing highlights. Suggestions?
    I bet it would look great, but if you're leery of doing it yourself, is a professional in the budget? 
    A professional would be out of my budget but going to a cosmetology school wouldn't be. The ones around here rarely charge more than $40-$45 for services, and the students are supervised. I've always had excellent experiences with cosmetology schools.
  • I'm on the flip side of this I think. I'm heavily covered in tattoos that I love, I used to rock a partly shaved head and snake bites. However, I've been growing my hair out the last year, its back to its basic red/brown, and I'm having as many visable tattoos covered as possible for the wedding. I wish I could tell you these profound reasons for taming it down, but I have no idea why. I just have this idea of what my wedding day looks like, and I guess for once I want to be "clean cut". I see my tattoos everyday, but I'm only going to have one day to play the girly bride role, might as well go big or go home I guess.

    *shrug*



    OurWildKingdom
  • The idea of looking like someone you aren't in your wedding pictures escapes me. I just don't understand why you would want to go through all that trouble to pretend to be a "girly bride" and "clean cut". I know lots of "girly brides" who didn't change who they were by covering tattoos, and they were all beautiful brides. Unless you have ”whore" or something obscene tattooed on your forehead I don't think you need to cover them to make a  lovely girly bride. 

    Did a non tattooed person talk you into this?

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